maybe these feelings keep returning, because in daily life something still needs to be learned/experienced?
You ask if maybe you still need to be forgiven? By whom? What if you just need to forgive yourself?
About the over and over returning of certain feelings...sounds familiar. I have this with an enormous feeling of grief that i just not seem to overcome.
Tears started coming out of nowhere some years ago. During a course in counseling everytime i started talking about myself....and about wishes or something like that...as soon as i started a sentence with ´I....´ i started crying almost uncontrollably. I felt weird and also a little ashamed.
Years later through dreams and lots of other strange experiences i found out that i was possible one of twins. When realizing this i experienced emotions like i never had before...totally crazy...
During that time i also had a few regression sessions to find out more about this, but instead i entered a possible past life. In that life i had a husband (with an agressive drink). We had 2 daughters and i was pregnant. I already had had a little of this life in a dream years before. During regression my husband returned home drunk and agressive. There was sort of a room underground where he would take me when agressive and drunk. He took me there and then cut the baby out of belly. He took the baby with him into the woods and left me dying.
I (still do) found it hard to say if i believe in past lifes, but again i got so intensely emotional. During regression, while dead, i felt an enormous wish to someday be together with my baby (son). Then there was a connection with the small twin brother i lost still in utero.
Over and over again i get so emotional, remember a little thing and find peace. But then days, weeks or months later...i get totally overwhelmed again.
It´s hard to grasp...not with a rational mind.
I hope you find peace with it someday...or ´the´ answer or ´the´ solution!