angnix, I'm here for you if you want to share more. Hope you don't feel I attacked him too hard. Just looking out for you. You lost your husband only six months ago and am now in this confusing game with this friend-cousin who is both keeping your hopes up and at the same time is putting you down. if you don't want the same thing from your relationship then you know what is the right thing to do. Don't sell yourself short. Real love is balance, it is not superior verses inferior, it is two people treating each other right, both ways. You have not done anything wrong and you deserve real love and not games.