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As a 'Being' you would know, yes, you would be aware of some missing element. Even at so young an age. Especially when we think about it, we come from Spirit as fully developed Spirits....it's only the physical body which is in the form of a little child or baby.
Little babies in other words, are Spirits taking on a new physical form -that's all.
Their physical brains and cognition might not be developed yet but they are fully conscious beings outside of time and space.
Bear in mind that your father in this life might have left partly because of the journey of discovery and creativity you needed to make....but needed that spiritual 'friction' in order to make it?
Huh -you might think -not much of a 'gift' from my Dad!....but the journey of the Soul is mysterious. And there are things above not easily seen below. He might be a loved one whom you have always known when in your Spirit home, who made such an 'arrangement' with you for your eventual benefit (?)
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