[lomax]

You know,when i was a kid i was wondering WHY i feel this way when i was near my father.(divorced parents).Not an evil person exactly,but one of those who had no problem to install 'guilts' or make you feel that you're the one responsible for his negative behaviour.Unfortunately his mother (my grandma) was exactly the same.

I was raised by my mother but i was paying a visit to them at least once-two times per week as a teenager.After that,i had to stay away from them for at least three days,because i was getting sick and depressed.And not only that,but i was also blaming my self for this,feeling guilty about why i don't love them,and why i keep paying visits to them only to get some money and to show them my good side.

I was harming my self,dennying to accept that my own father makes me sick and i don't love him at all.

I really wish them to die alone,or to be in need of my help,so i could happily trash them and treat them like nothing.
Is it the right thing to do?Who cares.It's a truth.This is how i feel.

And as you said,i think my father and grandma are energy vampires.That's why i was getting sick,and always fear of them.