13-05-2021, 05:57 AM
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Hi, what do you mean with "more serious"? Could it be a communication problem? I know it is obvious to you what you mean but maybe he don't follow you? If you two were close friends before the romantic relationship you should have the foundation of being real and honest and just sit by yourself and talk about it? I don't know your age either? Sometimes it can be the case of him planning perhaps to go through an education or want a specific job and does not have the financial ground to stand on to perhaps be in the position where it is a "good move" for you two to have your own place? I'm just mentioning an example, I don't know your situation.
One of the worst thing that can happen is that his action, his words are read to you as in him not loving you enough to get serious, so I would say you two really need to have a talk and try to see each other's perspective.
Of his personality trait - how is his family dynamic? Are they like that? These are just some questions you need to ask yourself (not answering me on this public forum), If someone is introverted usually mean someone in the family is a narcissist or close too, that he has a trusting issue, that you can get close - but not that close, you know what I mean? Could be he hasn't been taught to be any different, or aware or know the possibility of it.
I understand the need for affection and signs from him that he loves you, now when he has made you feel insecure. If one feels insecure in a relationship it is as if one goes from blossoming to withering, all sorts of inner processes start happening, signs saying this is not healthy for you.
I reacted on something you wrote that you too were careful not to show the other side/emotion of you as if you think you are too much. You are not too much. You are reacting to something unhealthy, something that is not resolved between you.
In every relationship but especially I would say the romantic kind you have to get real practical. You have to talk about the phase of the relationship, the speed, and what the relationship means to the both of you and what you hope to accomplish with it, that way you get each other. Sometimes one could be moving too fast in comparision to the other, sometimes it is the other way around, this why you need to have the talk. This is two lives coming together. There is so much we take for granted and we can't read thoughts, so it is easily there is a vulnerability and misunderstandings. There has to be left a space where the partner has to have a time to melt things too, to see it from the other perspective.
It can be he takes much for granted and is relaxed in the relationship with you why he forgets to be more romantic. That he does not understand that he is the one causing insecurity. So you got to talk to him about it.
I've told someone in the past that the price that I am to pay because I loved that someone is for me to feel inferior, insecure and not enough, is too much a price to pay. he had not seen it like that at all but when I pointed out why he understood and thought it was terrible and was sorry. But that is something that the love-business has taught me. You have to feel good about yourself and you can't be with someone who make you insecure where as you are not insecure in other relationships.
You could be so blunt to ask him are you just with me until you find something better? put him on the spot, make him understand something is wrong, but knowing he and you too can make it right together. You got to talk. that you know your own worth and this is not OK, this does not fly with you. That you would not treat him or anyone else like that.
All blessings to you, I know, relationships can be so difficult sometimes 
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