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Originally Posted by Hologram8
my doctor is at the VA hospital -- they really don't ever want to talk about anything - I just have to show up once every 6 months or they wont give me my medicine --- they don't want to talk about anything though usually the visit is only for a couple of minutes
sleep paralysis seems to be pretty common - a lot of people seem to be dealing with it
I just take the medicine so I can sleep --- they want me to take it in the daytime but I wont because I wouldn't be able to walk or anything - I would just be a vegetable
I can live with voices -- it's insomnia that bothers me
you have to be careful when dealing with the VA - the military is evil - from the recruiter to the VA - there are a lot of evil people who work at the VA that want to hurt you - they will kill you with a prescription just as easily as they will send you into a warzone - generally they are not your friends --- I moved to a better town where the people aren't evil and the VA treated me better there -- but here where I am now - the VA is evil
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Can't you go and see someone that you feel safe with? I understand you do not wish to take any pills that will make you that tired during day time, but the one my relative is taking for example is not in the relative's case making one tired. But from my understanding lots of pills out there does make one real tired.
Do you possible have a work insurance policy where if you tell your boss that you are in need to see the doctor (you could mention the sleep paralyses as a reason perhaps?) that you can get it for free, perhaps? if you don't want to go into that with your boss perhaps mention something that is less close to the mental part? Perhaps you don't need to tell your boss at all, but can contact them directly? I understand if it can be a sensitive matter)
I agree that sleep paralysis is pretty common, I just hope there is not anything else to it, but you are of course in your body and can be the better judge of that.
Your insomnia is a serious matter. You could eventually slip into a psychotic state (which is what happened to my relative), as no brain can go without sleep for that long, get that many disruptions.
I have noticed that I get most flashbacks from what seem to be past lives and am more open to the spiritual world in both a good and a bad way when I have not slept properly. I use to sleep walk much til I was about 8 or so, I think. This was too when I would say things that were past life related. And have a really bad recurring nightmare (that too was past life related), this does sound somewhat pathetic compared to what you have been going through regarding your military background, so I apologize for that..
If you are on something for sleep and it is not helping you enough with it you should in my opinion get some advice, different prescription or a successful combination, from a doctor you have confidence in and feel safe with.
Please, take care.