[Ewwerrin]

Then everything is fake. Meaningless.
My mother is fake. My father aswell. My existence. My physical body. The sun. The planet.
Abraham Hicks. The law of attraction. Every love I have experienced in my life is not for anyone except for myself. Meaning, I never experienced love. So love is also fake.

Basically, everything is fake. Also the idea of God is also fake. Because I created that idea to seek something that is real. That truely exists outside of me or myself. And nothing exists outside of me. As it is all a dream. And I am just here as the dreamer. And there is nothing that exists outside of this dream, except another dream. And every dream exists only because I find it hard to accept that I will be forevermore eternally alone. Eternity is a long time. So it makes sense why I have created infinite dreams. And why I continue to keep making all of these dreams. To try and find a different perspective of myself. In the hopes that maybe there exists a perspective of myself that is more than myself. But I will never be able to escape the absolute undeniable fact that I am the only one that exists. And there has never ever existed anything other than who I truely am.

Who I truely am cannot be put into words. Because these words are also part of this dream. And I have experienced endless many dreams. So this dream is by no means any more or less real than all those infinite many other dreams. Which means as always, I am talking to myself. And no matter how amazing something happens, it's fake. And if I don't interfere with what happens, only meaninglessness and valuelessness reveals itself as the absolute eternal and infinitely ever expanding source reality/truth that is the core root reality of all that exists throughout all of eternally and infinitely ever expanding reality/dimension/experience.

However there is the idea of forgetfulness. Of forgetting that I am the dreamer. Which is inevitably very painful. As waking up requires either all the infinite/eternal ever expanse of existence to collapse on top of me. And thus be free from all of it in an instant of immense pain. Followed by unspeakable amount of time in non-physical reality. Where trillions of trillions of years pass me by in mere seconds. And here in this slow/zoomed in expanded reality, where I am dreaming that I am not God, due to slowing my vibration/frequency of my consciousness. That it seems that the entire universe is seperate from me.

It's an interesting place to be here. But I seem to have already revealed that I am the only one that exists here. And by me, I am not even talking about my human body. So to know myself is really impossible. Because there is no end or destination to that knowing. I have to recreate in order to know. And that knowing lasts only nanoseconds. So it cannot ever be real or sufficient. And what is real, is nothingness, which also cannot ever be experienced. It goes even beyond my awareness.

It is pretty dissapointing to find out that every truth that someone speaks of, no matter how seperate from me it may seem, always reveals that I had already created that before I was even able to perceive it.

What is even more dissapointing is to find out that I have created so much, not out of love, but because I was afraid of the truth. Which is simply my inability to accept that I am, have always been and will forevermore, eternally and infinitely throughout all eternity and all infinity, be alone.