Quote:
|
Originally Posted by SaraTherase
Hello again ��
When one thinks of forgiveness we often have a generalized idea that it is right and good. Human beings are imperfect and often make mistakes and repeat unhealthy cycles etc and usually this happens because there is something needing to be grasped, obtained or learned.
My question regarding this subject is that we often see many people in the world physically hurting other people in the way of various forms of abuse and multitudes of people cheating on spouses etc
I am curious and wishing to develop a better understanding of where exactly does one draw the line regarding forgiving others? At what point does a person's value or self respect become compromised when practicing forgiveness?
I would be grateful for any thoughts, ideas or insights.
Many thanks
|
The primary purpose of forgiving is to help the one that's been hurt to move on and not allow the hurt to continue to bring her/him down as they move into the future.
It does NOT mean one has to declare that the action did not matter or did not cause great harm and/or to say to the perpetrator that their action is forgotten.
You can - should you choose - reach out to the perpetrator and offer to let the matter go but that's gotta be a personal choice. It naturally will likely be influenced by the nature of the hurt done and by the desire for both to move forward from it.
Where both parties indicate desire to move forward together then forgiveness can benefit both. But that's down to choice and it shouldn't be an expectation by the 'offender' or indeed exerted by others. There should be no pressure to forgive another who plainly does not want to move on and/or is likely to repeat their hurt, only encouragement for the one hurt to move away from the hurtful action and the perpetrator.