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From your post I gather you are unhappy at the loss of that "special essence" due to not being able to control your sexual desires. Be aware thou that sexual energy is quite important and is connected to creativity. Your chakras should be in balance and that includes your sex chakra.
Good healthy sex energy is important as it can be transmuted and used for other things.
Do you wish me to check your chakras out and tell you if I think your sex chakra is out of balance compared to your others or not? If you do, I'll pm you my response for this. "IF" there is an issue with it, the answer doesnt lie in fighting it but balancing it.
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