the way I look at reincarnation we are all here for individual purposes, so let's say your dad in this life - he has his path to walk, his struggles to overcome - what if they have all done their bit, and then you are asking your entire family of spirits to then be reincarnated with you to do the exact journey only you have to be a twin sister instead of in your current body. Why do you want to be your own twin sister? If you wish to be reborn as a female, and what ever you need to sort out in your own spiritual development later on here on earth there will be plans and outcomes and variety of destinies (on free will base).

Are you connected to maybe your parallel life? (to me meaning alternative destinies path, when you make an important decision in your life, whether aware of it or not, there will be this cut and another you will live on in that parallel).

I'm asking as you describe you have gender issues. If so I think I got your point, but please correct me if I am wrong, but you want to relive your life as a female, and you want to do so with the same family you love, and you love the time you are living in now, so the future is not for you.That if you had been reborn as your twin sister you would not have to have had this battle on the inside and part of your growing ups would not have that confusion and pain in it?

But maybe in this life, in the body you are in right now, is this alternative reality - what was meant to be, so you have to live through it and you have to make out what works best for you. Your family I think should be loving and supportive of you in this (or else I can imagine you would not have wanted them around just the way they are in another life). You could ask (your spirit guide) to show you an alternative parallel reality and see if that helps you on your journey?

I've been mostly so far experiencing that I was reborn a female but been male too and maybe partly for that reason I have always felt more comfy around guys as brothers or friends (Fall in love very rarely), and had to at times withdraw myself, remind myself, I used to have the looks of a tomboy too I've been told, before my body transformed into adulthood without my help to look like something else (but part of me will always remain a tomboy on the inside, had guys telling me all of a sudden they don't think I either care or am aware of how pretty or beautiful I am, my then luv would say about his ex when I pointed out I thought she was beautiful that "Yeah and she knows it", as if it was a negative thing, but about me keep a picture and say about me "My natural beauty", and in therapy he would say he felt he almost went from one extreme (female companionship) to the next, sometimes other's look on you is not the same as your own, (not to be mean to myself but I am not sure I would be my own type ;) )and of course that can be individual, and this is in no way to weight in just as much as what you have been going through, but I think in the end you just have to be true to yourself and let people know what you are about and for them to respect that), but for me there has been different time lines. Your family is part of your soul-group and will be reincarnated (maybe not all of them) with you in one way or another.

I can understand you can get a frustration about this, and well, they say patience is one of the things we have to learn, but I think you will get the bigger picture once in spirit and can then work on plans of reincarnation what will be suitable for your spirit's development.