way to go love water, good you are in terapy too to help you through this

just a little warning - just speaking of my own experience - make sure you don't take on your ex's responsibility to make himself feel better, where to draw the line but still be respective to his pain too. He might be help seeking, from what I could tell by the words in his letter but he too must take his own share, just so that you won't take over his, I mean

this to me was really, really hard especially when contacted by my ex when I was in a new relationship and he wasn't doing too well. I am still tortured by that but more so because he died and while living I was just one hand up all the time to stop him - in fear of what my current would say and that I did not want the ex to say too much. I truly regret that today and have to live with that for the rest of my life. They say I said the right things to him, but I didn't hear him out - I just interupt him. I was one big stop sign. And I was this stop sign in fear he would get too close and I would take over his responsibility but that is really a defect I have (being empath with no boundries) and I am learning these days where to draw the line.

I think it is important to hear someone out, and it will make it both easier for you and him to move on and to forgive, not that you will forgive if you don't want to in the lenght to return to him, but forgiveness will release you and free you of the pain in the past. The forgiveness is more about you, than him, but your forgiveness will free him too when going into the future.

again sorry for your pain and hoping for a better tomorrow, it will be better once you move out of the grief period as you are no longer under abuse