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Originally Posted by Honza
Having been on my own for most of my life I have spent a lot of time wondering why. My conclusion is that I am not selfish enough! Selflessness sends energy outwards and sends others away from you, whereas to have a partner you need to draw them in. It is based upon the law of attraction.
People who are selfless forget their own importance - and therefore so do others. They forget your importance. My theory is that most relationships are based upon 'I' to 'I'. Rather than soul to soul. (that comes later). Therefore ones needs that selfishness to tug people towards you.
You need a strong 'I' to attract people to you. Hence practicing I AM affirmations will draw people to you. Whereas loving others will satisfy them but not you.
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Hmm..
In reality, altruism is the core of happy and lasting marriages.
Yeah, there have been numerous studies done about long and happy marriages. The repeating theme is the altruism.
Perhaps, your "selfless" needs to be redefined from self sacrificing and low self-esteem.
Receiver and taker are vastly different as well.
It is true. One needs to state that "I" want this or that. But this is not about being selfish. This is an intention. This is about being self-aware and self assured.