Thread: Addictions
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Old 04-12-2019, 02:25 AM
Shivani Devi Shivani Devi is offline
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I am going to give an example here...it is also something I need to get off my chest...I have needed to do this for quite some time.

I have another addiction apart from oversleeping...I am a junk food addict. I am a vegan's worst nightmare. I will freely admit this...and I feel no guilt.

However, over the past year I have put on 20kg due to refined carbs and a lack of exercise...this has exacerbated the symptoms of my arthritic knees..and so, a few months ago, I made the decision to go on a Keto diet to lose some weight.

However, I made a HUGE mistake! I told my mother about my goals and aspirations looking (in vain as it turns out) for some moral support.

My psychologist wonders why I have problems making and sticking to any goals...why I have an addictive personality. It is all due to traumatic abuse.

The trauma came in the form of my parents and their insistence on "personal responsibility" and "being true to your words" and having "moral accountability" because that separates a person of "strong character" from a person of "weak character"...you know, all of those social values THEIR parents instilled in them during the 1930s and 1940's which are no longer relevant in today's society...

So, the day after I told my mother I was going on a diet, the FIRST thing she said the next day, even before "how are you?" is "have you started your diet yet?" and when I said "no, not yet" she said "why not?" and I had to make up excuses and lies which I would not have even HAD to do, had she not hounded me for an explanation...my parents raised me to be deceitful, dishonest and untrustworthy even though this was never their intention.

To pacify her, I said that I would begin my diet at the end of the week...

Later that week, she phones again.."have you started your diet yet?"

I had to tell her that I was going out to a party on the weekend and I would begin my diet on the Monday.

Next Thursday she phones me "have you started your diet?"
Me: "yes mum, I started my diet on Tuesday"
Mum: "how much weight have you lost since Tuesday? You should have lost half a kilo in two days"
Me: "I don't know, I haven't weighed myself since I started"
Mum: "well, go and weigh yourself... I'll wait.."
Me: "I'd rather weigh myself after a week to get a surprise".

Another week goes by ..mum phones .

"How's your diet going? Lost any weight yet?"

This kept up...and up...and up...until in the end, my mind totally rebelled .
"I am NOT continuing on this diet because I hate you SO much!"

So, I was able to answer my psychologists question about why it is that I have problems making and sticking to goals.
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