HI Returningmoon
I agree with you that ultimately, you have to find your own happiness, but also too, everything around you, everything you choose, can be a building process to support this in you. Sometimes taking chances, diving in, is another way to build this process as yourself. Taking risks is also another way to open your heart, especially when you don’t know. At times, to dive in, can be a way to just see how things might go, if it feels right in you. If you just remind yourself, when you dive in, you can change your mind at any time, you’ll be fine. Reading your post you already know what you want. I would do it your way in the end. Some people move fast in matters of the heart. Others like to take it slow. If slow is your way. Trust yourself.
