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Originally Posted by Rosewater
I have been hurt too many times in my life and too forgiving.. i have let people in my life too many times that have hurt me in so many ways.. i finally cut those chords.. do i really have to forgive them? i feel like forgiving them no longer holds them accountable for their actions.. they have wronged me unfairly in so many ways and chance after chance i have given them and they just hurt me.. i can't let them back in, they don't even see the errors of their ways.. so what can i do? i don't want to hold negative resenetment energy in but i feel like letting go won't hold them accountable for their actions, i also dont' really now how to let go.. as i am hurt at a deep level
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Rosewater, I can totally empathize with you and your problem. I have had to make a nonsense mantra for myself, "I'm like a duck; I just duck and let it roll off of me" Sounds totally trite, but that is basically it. Two daughters have hurt and betrayed my trust so many times that we don't even speak. And that was their choice, not mine. It hurts and there are grandchildren involved. But at the same time I feel so very sorry for my daughters. You can't keep dwelling on it; you can't keep going over the 'what if's '.But you have to let go of any bitterness or anger. Those emotions will eat your body and soul up. They lead to heart attacks and cancers. Forgive and don't try to forget because you can't Not a real spiritual answer I know, but it is self preservation and logical. You can't keep your doors unlocked after you have been robbed a few times. Then it is time to make sure that the house IS locked up and safe. I will probably get some gaff on this reply, but I do know what you are feeling and what you have gone thru.