[Simontology]

I have a feeling this question is asked often but its very important to me

I've been reading up on NDEs especially the NDEs of those who have
committed suicide, I'm not depressed or anything but I am experiencing this great desire to "go home" and I feel like if I were to see the after life or at least have an OBE maybe it can give me the desire to keep on living I'm not sure if any of this makes sense

I heard of a man named Edgar Cayce who found a way to have OBEs and an ability to explore heaven on command and I'd like to be able to do that, maybe even teach it to others who are also going through a difficult time

Even a decent book on the subject would be great

Anyway, thank you for your time