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Glad you find it interesting, Clio!
The thing your friend did/does is another not so handy thing many women tend to do: mention a relationship way too early. That comes across as being needy, plus men usually need time for such things to grow and develop.
It is best to let that happen organically and even more so to let the man come up with that when he is ready.
Remember, men's collective wound is commitment so when a woman he's barely been dating starts talking relationship almost right away he'll freak out. Had she not done that he might have gotten there, but mentioning it so early on is quite the thing.
And I agree with you on the sex on a first date. Matthew Hussey always said to not have sex until there's an emotional bond and you don't have that yet on a first date.
I remember once meeting someone who had real interest and that was mutual. Then we had sex too early, and I could feel this shift happening in him: I moved from serious relationship material -which I had been until we had sex- to more FWB material. Such a shame as we did have a very deep click. Everything was ruined because we had sex too soon. And it's hard to reverse that. After having had sex it is already the standard for the guy and he assumes from there on out you will simply be available for sex.
I never had sex on a first date, made a mistake that one time, a reason why that came to be (long story) and now back to not ever doing that again.
Oh well...
Not beating myself up over it either. As another male dating coach said: if it's right it won't go awry just like that.
And I believe that too.
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