[acorn]

If you come to a spiritual forum ...any one of them...them you have been prompted to seek answers, and you should take heart in this...it is no small thing.
Let it be a float to keep your head above water when you feel bogged down...when understanding has not yet ripened so to speak.
Many would call this prompting Grace...but I don't want to get caught up in that statement.
That we keep this quest for knowledge is whats most important...like the old adage; if you get bucked off the horse....ya gotta get back on it....keep trying
So give yourself a break, and try not to get discouraged...but at the same time earnestness is crucial for understanding to unfold.

In my unsolicited opinion....keep it stupid simple....get the lay of the land before you jump down a rabbit hole

Love
acorn