Suicide
 

My aunt committed suicide in a very violent way yesterday. We are all shocked and in an immense state of grief.

I used to believe that suicide meant you didn't get to be with God.

Now I believe she she is home where she needs to be and is at peace. I pray that for her anyway.

I want to talk and talk and talk. I am in disbelief that this is happening to my family. I am so sad. I have cried all day and am so weak right now.

I cry for my uncle, my two cousins, my mom who has lost her sister.

I cry because I have been there and have been fortunate enough to come through the other side of it.

And I never ever thought I'd be part of the surviving family of a suicide victim.
:icon_frown:

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss in your family. I too, know what it's like to lose a family member to suicide. It kind of sounds like you're still in the state of shock stage. It isn't easy getting through all the different stages of grieving, but things will eventually get better. Hang in there and just try to take it one day at a time. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

:hug2:

You are absolutely right.When you commit suicide then it means you do not have faith on God.Think positively the suicide means that you have admitted that you are a looser.Can you listen your self a looser?
Absolutely not.always have faith on your god.Think that God is your best friend and protector.

People take their own life for all kinds of reasons, ranging from being in too much physical pain, emotional pain or unable to find a better solution to their problems. But that does not mean they were a looser. Perhaps to some people who are too quick to pass judgement and/or didn't really know the person, they might be considered a looser. But to their family, friends and anyone else who loved them, they were not a looser. To make such claims is very disrespectful to both that person and the loved ones they leave behind.

Sending thought from me and my family at this tough time :hug3:

My condolences, Alleigh...My cousin committed suicide last year after a battle with Alcoholism and it really hurts...I am wishing you and your family well through this hard time.

seeker89

My thoughts are with you are your family. It is unfortunate that you have to go through this. I can imagine it would be horrible. As someone said, just take one day at a time. Life can be awful but unfortunately there is nothing we can do about it.

**sigh** some folks just can't take it anymore, whatever "it" is. one has to be in extreme pain of some sort to override one's natural survival instincts and for this reason the harm they cause their loved ones by their self determined departure, with some understanding and compassion, can be forgiven.

condolences to you and your family, Alleigh. i wouldn't worry about where your aunt is right now. she obviously suffered more than enough during her life on Earth and i have no doubt that she's somewhere gentle and healing.

Massive :hug2: to you, alleigh. Your aunt must have been in a terrible place to have done this. :icon_frown:

I cannot say much to comfort you, I know, but I do know of someone (not personally, through acquaintances), who took their own life, who then some time later came through in spirit to a relative who was a medium. Needless to say this person reassured their family that they were doing just fine in spirit. So I believe that people who commit suicide are helped and nurtured on the other side - they are (obviously) distressed souls at the time of their deaths, who desperately need it.

Please accept my most sincere sympathies at this horrible time. :hug2:

Shocker
 

I’m sorry that you & your family have had this happen.

Talk about whatever you need to as much as you need to.

I am so sorry for you and for family, Alleigh

You have your right to express your opinion, but I believe you are very wrong. I cannot conceive of a loving God that would scorn and push away his miserable, distressed children, any more than I can imagine a loving parent here would do so. And my knowledge of the person I mentioned in my above post - who is much loved and missed by many, many people, and is most definitely not a "loser" (what on earth??) - leads me to believe that people who commit suicide are treated with the compassion and support that they need in the next life.

I am so sorry for your loss. As someone who has survived a suicide attempt I have had to learn how precious life really is in order to keep going. Some days it is all I can do to just get up but after trying to give up, I fight to keep going. I have battled my own demons and I never look down on anyone who feels they cant cut it in the real world. Life is hard and we are going to mourn our losses but please know they she is finally at peace. The wonderful thing about God is that He is always loving and always forgiving. Find peace with that.

Heh. I just got done writing a post earlier about how my life has been dogged by suicides. If you want to talk and talk and talk, I am here; just PM me.

I disagree with SteffMarshall but I can also see the point he/she is making. It's a two-sided coin. It's not that your aunt lost faith in God; it's that your aunt was overwhelmed with human existence and wanted nothing more than to go back to God. This does not make one weak or a looser. Isn't it what we all long for? Yet yes, there is that flip side.... why take such a short cut like that? For those left living, that is the very question to ponder.

If you believe in reincarnation then it may console you to consider your aunt chose a very challenging path for this incarnation. She may have chosen to kill herself as a sacrifice for the rest of you that she loved, for lessons you all needed to learn to grow. In other words, she agreed to leave this world when she did, because it was all a part of a grand master plan, for the rest of you who are her One.

Or she simply took on more than she could handle, got overwhelmed, and went back for a rest. To stay on the other side from here on out, learning lessons from afar, watching and learning from afar, from a safer distance, through your lessons instead of experiencing them directly herself.

Just please whatever you believe, know that she is just fine, she may not be here in form, but she IS very much here. In ever breath you take. If you miss her, breath her in from the air. The molecules you breath in may transform their way into tears coursing down your face, and that is all as well... they evaporate, go back into the air, become clouds, rain down, filter through the ground, become the water you drink and a critical part of you.

Hugs and much love. I'm here, if you want to talk. Talk on and on to me all you want. Been there, done that. Over and over...

P.s. I am not going to say I'm sorry for your loss, because I truly believe -- not believe, I KNOW -- you have not lost anything. Though I do understand right now it probably feels like that, and very much so. One of these days, not tomorrow, not next year... but one of these days.. you will know too.

And, I want to thank you for your post that helped me put some things in my own house in order.

I heard that God takes into consideration the person's mental illness before they committed suicide. So sad to hear this. I hope you have faith to know she is okay. I recommend going to chapels of Catholic Churches where Jesus' presence is said to be and just talk to him about it. I suggested a friend come with me one time about her struggles from moving away from her family but doing what in her heart she thought was right and she had to leave the chapel because she swelled up with emotion. I really feel its a healing place. When I am literally drained by life and just tired of it I go there and leave feeling refreshed and in peace again. May God hearken to your prayers and bless your family.

I want to say this without advocating suicide, because I don't, honestly, I don't!.... nor do I think it's constructive to advocate it, so I do understand the church's teachings on this, really I do... but...

Mental illness? Please. What is more sane than wanting to be back in God's arms? Is that not what all of us spiritual seekers ultimately want?

Dwell deeper on this. Maybe you will uncover the layer of the onion that is the Puritan work ethic --- reunion with God takes hard work and effort and practice, not an easy short cut. And, I'd probably agree with that, but then there are many additional layers of the onion to cry through as you cut and slice away at this particular question, breathing in and crying out souls as you do.

Don't ask why they did it -- ask what you can learn from it. Here. In your human experience. Go deeper than the pat answers. The pat answers work with your first funeral. Kind of. Maybe. By your 6th you've got to the heart of the onion.

Perhaps the greater insanity is being here. And then you realize -- insane is awesome amazing space to be! Let's hear it for the insane!!!

Question. Are you saying that all people who commit suicide are just spiritual seekers who what to return to God?

My Stepdad committed suicide after his new doctor changed his depression medication three times in one month. Even after this new doctor been warned by the previous doctor to never change the medication, because of a prior history of attempting suicide after the meds were changed, he still did it anyway, telling my Stepdad that he just wasn't even trying to get better.

I'm sorry, but I do think mental illness most certainly can drive a person to taking their own life.

I am very sorry for your loss.
Suicide is a very.. taboo subject even today, but I witnessed my best friend mourn for a friend of hers who committed suicide.

I do not believe, if you commit suicide 'you go to hell' In fact, I dont believe in hell.

Her spirit guides, would have helped her with the transition - and for whatever reason she done it for. They will be helping her heal.

If it helps, talk to her. The biggest question is 'why'. But not everyone opens up and the most unexpected people could commit suicide.

I hope this helps somehow.

Stay strong

Hezxo

Thank you for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers.

My initial suicide/heaven beliefs did come from the catholic faith however, I have since moved on from religion all together. They don't teach of this stuff on this forum in CCD or even Sunday school in any church that I've ever heard of. What I have learned comes from within.

I once struggled with depression. For about 14 yrs until I was healed. I've had two failed suicide attempts so I know how she felt - and even if not to the nth degree - I've been there. And I do understand how she could believe it was her only way to escape the darkness. She was on the wrong medication which is why we believe she was able to commit this horrendous act. This seamless woman, who was in charge of every breath from dawn to dark, who lit up the world with her singing and grace and love and how she loved her children...only 7 months ago something invaded her and drove her away from us, God, her children, and any joy she had. She did not find comfort in anything worldly.

I truly believe that when she died, she was welcomed with open arms and when I close my eyes I can see her so light and loved. I can feel her all around us. I do not wish her back here at all. I will surely miss her, as we all will, but we are settled in the peace that we know she now has. She is being healed, cared for, and will be given whatever role she will now fill.

Suicide IS a delicate matter however the bottom line is, people need to be loved and remembered regardless. I would never think anyone a loser should they take their own life. In their minds, it is the only way. (I've been there. I just didn't do it right.)
And we are not to judge that. We embrace one another and mourn however, we feel her love even moreso than before.

Thank you so much again, for listening to me. Still in a bit of shock and sadness and coming full circle with knowing she is in a far better place...

I'm sorry for the pain you are dealing with regarding the loss of your beloved aunt. I don't believe that anyone goes to hell. I have struggled with suicidel thoughts and desires and attempts my whole life. At one point, while trying to be a 'christian', I could no longer take it, and cried out to God that I didn't believe a god of love...that people claim is 'love' would cast me to a place like hell in my despair and pain. I asked for forgiveness and I cried out how I simply could not continue living in the mental and emotional anguish I was...at that moment, it was a truly liberating moment for me. All pain ceased, I got the urgent sense that I feared a place that didn't exist, all that existed was love. All my surroundings even looked different, calmer, peaceful, beautiful. It's funny because I've been listening to one of Eckhart Tolle's books on CD while driving to school each day...I read the book before and it was not doing much for me during the dark period of my life...but hearing it now and how he came to be out of his darkness, I could totally relate to.

Anyway, sorry for the rambling, please be at peace and while you miss your aunt, please don't worry she's in hell. She is not a loser, she was a hurting woman....

Beautiful post Sarian!!

sorry for your loss am sure a speak for everyone when l say where all here for you xx

I am sorry for your loss.

[quote=Sarian]It's funny because I've been listening to one of Eckhart Tolle's books on CD while driving to school each day...I read the book before and it was not doing much for me during the dark period of my life...but hearing it now and how he came to be out of his darkness, I could totally relate to.

QUOTE]

May I ask which of Eckhart Tolle's books you are referring to? I've listened to an audiobook of his in the past and it helped me a great deal. I think I need to turn to another work of his at this time in my life. Thanks:hug3:

Tolle's stuff has an interesting habit of working better for fairly comfortable people, if you only read a few pages at a time. If you can get through half the book in a day - which is so hard when you spend every page reflecting, haha - it can change anyone. Though if you don't mind me joining the conversation, it's great that you're seeking out the message again. He leads you through the human tunnel, into the light ... then into more and more light with each word :D
Everyone reacts differently, but on topic ...

I hope this helps you abandon your worries. Not many people know the origins of the Christian suicide beliefs. In Roman times, the new Christian religion was spreading. They were a touch decadent. So those who'd lived by the Ten Commandments realised, wow, this Heaven place sounds amazing. Let's go there now!
Soon the Church's numbers began dwindling. Now they cared about their message, and didn't want the people sharing it to die out. Unfortunately, the Papacy ran their flock with Pax Romana, the same tactics that the Roman army used. So they chose fear tactics, and told the new Christian sect that suicide was now a sin. Those who performed it with no regret would definitely live with eternal damnation.
Ah, the tangle those two words have caused. Someday Humanity will laugh at the idea, promise :)

You know, all of us looking for answers in this topic have chosen a good place for it. So much healing intention ...

Don't be weak, don't let your family bring you down! Remember, you're a light warrior. Light warriors are strong people.

Consequence
 

I'm very sorry to hear about anyone who suicides. There is no Hell but there is a consequence. From what I have read, a person repeats the life and circumstances that led up to the suicide, so really, it is never is an escape. It just looks that way.
Bye

My impression: Souls who commit suicide do not go to hell. I've communicated with a friend from beyond the grave who took her own life and she was in a good, healing place. She was raped by her father and suffered from bipolar and gave up because of the pain. In a meditative vision I saw her as a child and she told me "I can be innocent again" and she was on a playground with angels surrounded by light. She regretted taking her own life but was learning from the experience.

There is absolutely no punishment for taking your own life other than that souls often regret doing it after the fact and make a commitment to not do it again. It can even be a learning experience for souls who take advantage of it. We learn what not to do by making mistakes, right? It is just another lesson. If it becomes a habit - which for most souls it does not - than the birthing guides address this by the structure of the souls lives and sometimes their spiritual growth may be a bit slower than others due to this. I think for some souls who are in truly intractable pain and/or debilitation without any possible end in sight suicide is permissible. People have to be very honest with themselves and their guides/god/inner self about where to draw that line so that they are not being rash. But I am a proponent for assisted suicide in some cases. Also, souls that suicide while they are mentally ill or in a psychotic state I sense are not held accountable because they were not truly in touch with themselves or with reality. Again, its very individual - but souls will judge their spiritual progress not just on how they ended their lives but also how they lived it.

alleigh-- i am so sorry to hear this. i committed suicide in a past life, so while I can't even begin to fathom your grief, I can understand what your aunt went through. Having been back for a few incarnations since that life, and having gone through a past life and life between lives regression, I can say that your aunt was met on the other side by souls who love her unconditionally and that the pain she felt in this lifetime went away as soon as she returned home.

I can tell you unequivocally that when you commit suicide you are not 'punished' for it in the afterlife and that my experience of 'karma' from the suicide was more about learning how people would be able to forgive me and how to forgive myself than it was about being 'punished' for what i'd done.

if you want to talk more, send me a private message. I'm more than happy to answer questions from the perspective of someone who made the decision your aunt did, but i'm also just happy to listen if you need someone to talk to.

My Condolences to your family. So sorry.

My stepfather committed suicide too. I started having strange vivid dreams afterwards where he would come to visit me but he looked sad and he had phantom black bags attached to his torso which seemed to weigh him down.

When he was alive he once said to me that if there is an afterlife, he would try to prove it to the living when his time came.

Later, I'd have more dreams and one in particular where he told me that "it is all true". Then, he started coming to me in happier moods and looking younger and more alive. This was before I found out about OOBEs and lucid dreams.

When I decided to visit him for the first time in an OOBE, I seemed to have surprised him in his own world where he was living out some fantasy. Later, he would cry to me and tell me that he regretted what he did. I patted him on the back and told him that everyone makes mistakes and that nobody blamed him. That seemed to cheer him up.

After that, he would surprise me in lucid dreams and once he even asked me how I could visit him. I told him about OOBEs and he seemed interested.

Anyway, as I became more experienced it just seemed to easy to visit him. It made me feel really good and it has been very beneficial for me in terms of getting over his death (whether it was really him or not). He has also told me things that checked out in real life but I can never be sure if it was coincidence or product of the subconscious reservoir.

These days I don't visit him any more but I might again...like seeing an old friend...

I don't think there is any punishment in death. Mistakes can also be beneficial. there is a lesson learned in everything. And let's face it, whether there is an afterlife or not...the deceased are still winning.

Suffering comes from living and, although there are those of us that endure this experience and get the most out of it...others cannot take it any more (or they believe that they can't).

I could not have said this better myself!

So sorry for you and your family.

:hug: I am so sorry for your loss and if it brings you any comfort at all to know you are not alone (my grandpa shot himself, and i have had a few close friends commit suicide) I am so sorry for what you are going through. We are here for you, and for those that have experienced similar, we understand.:icon_frown: Please take at least a little comfort in this.
If you need to talk, i would be more than happy to just listen.

I just wanted to give you a :hug: too for what you have been through Trieah

a:hug: for you too seeker. sorry for your loss

sorry for your loss too.:hug:

I am not crying, just trying to be there for another since i have been through similar... when your grandfather shoots himself, and when your friend jumps infront of a train... it kinda changes your outlook on suicide, karma or not... i am trying to provide comfort to someone who needs it now.. and the hugs i gave were in mutual understanding and connecting as human beings. I always have good intent. I do not believe she or i need any lectures at all, instead understanding, comfort and acceptance.
I am not understanding your lack of compassion.

sending some love
 

:hug2:

i wish you the best & i really wish there were something i could say to soothe the pain. much love & hope to you and your family.

(((hug)))