I need an advice
 

I have this conflict in me, so I will speak as direct as I can, and if I offend anyone, I am extremely sorry. I don't know what category to put myself in but,
there are times I feel the need to eat meat like a hunger spike then.
There is after I eat some for like 2 weeks then my taste change and I just can't stand to eat meat,
and every time I encounter a bone or anything I lose appetite completely or I just vomit and have a feeling of disgust like I am being reminded of the pain and the suffering of what I eat feeling of guilt as if myself made the kill, and that it's,
in fact, a corpse that brutally been murdered, then I feel the urge to eat only vegan food suddenly it tastes so good, and I feel satisfied from that, normally those are cycles of 2 weeks each than my taste change again, I need an advice what is going on with me ?,
why I swap so much often the taste and why suddenly I feel that way and when I become a meat-eater the only thing I feel is a drive and hunger for meat then after swapping out to vegan ? what is going on with me ?, that happen for as long as I remember myself.

I think its sort of normal
Would you like to stop eating meat for good or...?
Cause if so you can try many vegetarian things that have more of a meat texture...you also have to see why you crave meat, is it the texture, a certain dish, etc etc

I think the craving has to do with animal fat. I think most people crave the cholesterol as it is good for the brains. Fake ''meats'' can have a similar texture but the content isn't the same. You don't have to choose between veganism and meat eating. How about a middle ground where you eat dairy and eggs?

I will try that out I try to avoid it as I am sensitive to lactose,
when I use it I just literally getting enslaved to the toilet,
maybe I will try milk or cheese without lactose I was so afraid to try them but I will go for that,
the problem is when you do not live alone with someone who not sensitive to lactose they get all the normal milk and cheese so anytime you try to touch them that not good but I guess I will try to (toxic mother every word you throw turn to drama so I prefer most time sit silent,
in the corona time, many were forced to live with their parents because of the horrible economy situation, deep inside I wish I could just break free, but I know that not practical or doable to sustain together that hard even with our own home, so alone to get and rent a home that hard )

Lactose free sounds like a plan.:smile: I can't drink milk after eating, then things go wrong. Also have to be careful combining fruit with dairy.

Maybe what you're actually craving is salt and fat so that you feel satiated after a meal. Even a handful of roasted salted cashews might help over come that craving or a handful of walnuts would be an excellent choice as then you'd also be getting the omega 3 fatty acids that you need for health.

ye my diet has no omega 3 as I don't eat anything from the sea come to think about it my diet is normally 3 meals with 1 rice bread slice that I create myself(cooking risotto rice and then blend it with eggs and put at the toaster). in my meat-eating time poultry meat salad and that it, and when I am vegan same rice bread an egg on it salad (salad is tomato cucumber onion and maybe garlic) and that it.

You are transitioning, but something in you still desires the meat experience from time to time.

When I was at this phase, I would instead eat Beyond Burgers (plant-based burgers). The experience was very close to actually eating meat itself, that it satiated the desire for hamburger.

I am sorry, I do not know what to say. I think each person that tries the vegan or vegetarian diet has a different experience. Some are motivated by their own health, some by the animals life. I begun quitting meat many years ago and have never back to eating meat again because of animals' suffering.

Going vegan was a simple decision for me. Living any other way is not ethical. Understanding of the principle of karma led me to my decision.