Care
 

Curiously today, I’m looking at care towards yourself and life. How the care you give to you, extends outwardly as care to life around you.

In todays world of social media and people baring and exposing their lives, out to a greater world, you notice how important validation, likes and acknowledgment becomes in their world. It’s all part of building acceptance and self love, self care. I’m not against it. I see the value in its creator and creation as a shared space.

We find what we need as we send outwardly our own creation.

People who love and care, often don’t think these two positive attributes can be emeshed or entangled with unhealthy attachments. Yet all things (whether labelled as good or not so good) we do and create from our reality within, do get entangled by deeper unhealthy attachments, that we sometimes over look.

Care especially can hold within itself hidden agendas. Our ignorance of course, unable to notice or our minds idea, deciding, because it’s good and we care it has no hidden agenda.

Many if us have been bound by ‘duty’ ‘it’s the right thing to do’. We are also driven by extremes, where by we’ve had models who were very uncaring and unloving, so we take up the cause of care and love, determined to not be like them at any cost. Sadly for many people what they often house within the whole framework, is unresolved reactions, that keep this person going, keep it alive, determined to show themselves and others, they are good people.

In this striving to be this good and caring person, you can miss vital pieces of yourself contained by these kind of ideas and conditions set up by life and yourself.

You lose the true essence of what your authentic true self is as a loving caring person. Without any attachments, you’ll begin to see that it isn’t bound by anything, their is no measure, or comparisons. Their are no need to do or be in this space. Plus it isn’t identified by anything. It is you being you. You’ve cared for yourself so deeply you’ve let go of the external ideals about how you should be and show care.

As a model of care without pleasing, duty or bound by anything, care takes on a whole new approach. Discernment and patience, understanding and recognition from a bigger picture, lead you more aware, more spontaneously rather than rigid and fixed by governing old school systems in you.

People often flinch when identity meets this part of them.

They don’t want to be seen in bad light, as a person who is not good. Who doesn’t care.

Yet the hidden agendas priming and motivating your care, are and will be detrimental to you and others long term.

True care through your true self, doesn’t create upheavals and reactions. True self and your care is right and true and clear.

You wont care what other people care about your care. You’ll be aware of the changing face of care and care differently, more observant and aware of your own motivations. More aware and clear how spontaneity serves the shared space equally and as each need separately.

A really interesting topic JustBe.

Ok in my opinion I feel that you should have a BALANCE between caring for others and caring for yourself ie giving some time to others as much as giving some time to yourself.

When you care too much for others you can become resentful and if you care too much about yourself then you become a narcissist, not good either.

Many of us honour other people by caring/helping but most forget about honouring themselves.

Having a balance between the two is key for me.

You state……….”determined to show themselves and others, they are good people”

I feel you should be showing YOURSELF you are a good person and not thinking about others.

you also state………”duty as it’s the right thing to do”

Sorry but this word duty really rubs me up the wrong way and I DONT believe it is the right thing to do. In fact I don’t believe in duty at all. I feel it is a word that people/institution/families use to manipulate others into doing what they want them to do. (Our young boys having to go to war as one example)

If you’re only doing something for someone because it’s a duty, then what’s the point. You’re not doing it because you care or want to do it and you will only end up being resentful which in turn will affect your health and probably the other persons.

IMO You don’t owe anybody anything and they don’t owe you anything. You should be doing something for others because you genuinely .want to do it and not “because of duty”.

Ok so there’s my take on this topic and I don’t expect many people with agree with it cos I know I tend to see things in a completely different way to most people. But I look forward to reading other peoples comments about this topic.

Me too :)

To be able to care for others you have to care for yourself as well .I don't have a mobile phone through choice social media is a minefield.
you wont find me on there either,
My kids have mobiles but it is not for me.
I don't understand people who live their lives on Facebook and the like then they moan when someone says something they don't
like what they have said


Namaste

whether or not one thinks one cares, or whether or not one thinks they are a good person, or to whatever extent one might be posturing, it still a very difficult thing to disentangle oneself from the ideas one has about the perceptions others should have about one, and the consequential choice of behaviors meant to try to reinforce it..

@redchic
Thanks for your thoughts.

I didn’t have an issue with your response, it’s pretty much sound and related to my view anyhow.
Balance is pretty much the undertone of my post, so that’s great you mentioned it.

Doing from a genuine place can be fraught with imbalance unknown, so often they’ll build all kinds of reactions when things start to fall away from their normal giving.

It’s not always easy to recognise those imbalances in yourself, but generally it’s probably wise to look within and ask yourself why your doing what you do. Look and listen from within and see if your intent aligns to an inward state of balanced clarity.

That’s like reading a tongue twister. Lol.

You lost me from the word disentangle. Can you explain differently for me falling leaves. I’d like to understand.

Thanks 😊

hi justbe i was playing with words lol, but, what I meant was, i still find it difficult to not get tangled up in thinking about the perceptions I want others to have of me... and trying to make them reality... I'm slowly finding my way through the maze...

i guess another way of saying it is i find it a difficult thing trying to stand up, without trying to set someone else up as a leaning-post...

If I’m correct falling leaves your post might be speaking about ‘what others think’ of you.

I’ve found it very difficult letting go of what others think of me. It’s been a big shift away from so many old patterns, each one coming full circle in me to face fully. It hasn’t been easy. I was never a people pleaser but I did find myself upset if I was seen in poor light.

Again though it’s all about letting go of emotional binds tying you to those thjngs.

I like play on words haha, must be the poet in me..hehe

So I’m seeing that more clearly now, what your expressing, thank you.

So curiously what do you want them to perceive of you?