Originally Posted by nightowl

We can offer but the key is the second chance comes when they are ready to initiate it. It is not being passive when you show genuine concern for another, very often what is miss guided is when the concern becomes forced on another. There are many ways to help those who struggle both passive and aggressive but it still comes back to an individuals desire to change. Much time and many resources can go into helping an individual, and many times because the will to change isn't present the help falls by the way side.
Helping other to understand the choices they make and the consequences of those choices is a noble thing and is important, that is unconditional love, but the outcome is still determined by the individual. Sometimes it is all in how you say things as to rather it comes out as feelings of concern or feelings of judgment. If they aren't ready to receive it, then it isn't the right time. Give freely expecting nothing in return, let God/Spirit bring them to where they can hear and than be there to help if they ask. If you are a Christian believer I am sure you have heard the statement you can dislike the behavior, but not the person. It is not an easy thing to stand by and see someone self destruct but you just have to be there and wait for them to come around, sometimes they do and sometimes they don't and sometimes you just never know.

Originally Posted by Shim

If you have ever heard a true Christian say that they hate the sin but love the sinner then you are accurately stating such a thing in defense of their ancient and outdated thinking. Oh well, enough for me tonight, too tired to continue on but perhaps tomorrow. :hug: