relapse

[debbie.b]

ggrrrrrrr......thought i was coping really well but i've woken up this morning feeling like poop!! sent an email last night knowing i wasn't going to get a reply but still had to do it. i've been posting songs on my facebook with words that relate to my situation & i have this really strong sense of presence right now & it's driving me nuts!!!!

[debbie.b]

Creed My sacrifice + lyrics (http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3 D5I3gLaTG80w&h=47436)
www.youtube.com (http://www.youtube.com)

Creed - One last breath with lyrics (http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3 DB-yXPPFyG0A&h=47436)
www.youtube.com (http://www.youtube.com)

just how i'm feeling.......... :-( i'm a saddo!!! lol

[mystical]

(((((((((((hugs))))))))))) i think we all do this foprk time to time , if u watch my fb u will see sum days im all down n missing him posting music etc the enxt ego steos in and i act liek this the best thing that ever happened to em and how i dont need or wnat him , i use to wake up every single morning n he be ther in my head soon as my eyes opened now its abotu 15 mins or so now sum days i go all day with onyl a few thoughts even tho he is always there in the front of my mind but then others i break down but i quickly compose myself and try to meditate connecting with hhis heart always makes me feel better :) dont be too hard on urself and when u relapse know that it is perfectly normal and embace all what u feel xxxxxxxx

[Lostgirl]

It happens to everyone :) Dont worry and dont get yourself down about it. Evrything will be fine in the end and despite all the hard times one day you will look back and think to yourself "what on earth was i doing".

Sometimes sending that email just makes you feel better, knowing that they know how you feel and that you have done everything you can to get them back :) Dont worry about it and just relax it happens to the best of people :)

[NightSpirit]

5 steps forward and 2 back. Keep plodding away at it debbieb

[NightSpirit]

I just had this thought. People tell me that losing someone through break-up or divorce is far worse then losing that someone through death. I'm starting to believe this now...at least mine is completion...others don't have that.

[mystical]

i kinda agree with this , but for me when i lose my twin i literally grieve , it feels liek i have lost all my loved ones again as well as myself if that makes any sense for me losing my twin actually felt like he was gone forever :(((that deep pain and longing neevr going away always felt with the images of him looking at me and the way he would hold me i was being haunted its pure torture , when i lost my brother the pain was indescribeable cos i felt i had also lost my son when my tiwn pulled away it was the exact same pain a real physical ache, i was broken i never thought i would ever come to terms with my grief or my loss for my brother but meeting my twin it made the pain go away and it was easier and i was thankful for walking the path i had cos it led me to him eventually and was worth all the heratache

[NightSpirit]

i kinda agree with this , but for me when i lose my twin i literally grieve , it feels liek i have lost all my loved ones again as well as myself if that makes any sense for me losing my twin actually felt like he was gone forever :(((that deep pain and longing neevr going away always felt with the images of him looking at me and the way he would hold me i was being haunted its pure torture , when i lost my brother the pain was indescribeable cos i felt i had also lost my son when my tiwn pulled away it was the exact same pain a real physical ache, i was broken i never thought i would ever come to terms with my grief or my loss for my brother but meeting my twin it made the pain go away and it was easier and i was thankful for walking the path i had cos it led me to him eventually and was worth all the heratache

Yes, I imagine you do all these things in the grieving process...no different to losing someone in death. But, at least I can reach a completion, where-as with them still around, i imagine somewhere in the back of your mind you always hold out for hope...and to me that's never going to reach completion.

[Falling Star]

I have also found that the seperation from these bonds is somewhat of a grieving process. Many of us have been together in our previous lifetime whereby we were seperated by death. So.........These bonds prove the truth of eternal life.
All part of the spiritual awakening process......And although we might feel blinded by pain there is a much higher purpose involved.

[NightSpirit]

I have also found that the seperation from these bonds is somewhat of a grieving process. Many of us have been together in our previous lifetime whereby we were seperated by death. So.........These bonds prove the truth of eternal life.
All part of the spiritual awakening process......And although we might feel blinded by pain there is a much higher purpose involved.

This I believe beyond a doubt.

[SpiritStarFly1]

I can completely sympathise. I've been up and down over the last (almost) 3 weeks, and at previous times when I was in contact with him (he never knew - or at least, he did but we never spoke about it, I could see it in his eyes, feel the soul connection). At the moment, today, I'm ok. But later on I could just suddenly burst into tears.

I've tried the Facebook thing but I think he is quite emotionally immature tbh and not really able to read between the lines. When I walked away 3 weeks ago I promised myself that would be it but found myself emailing him that very same evening - no reply tho (ouch).

Relapses hurt, and at times it feels as if your heart is being ripped out. Take care of yourself during this time, comfort yourself with the things you like doing - curled up with a good book and mug of hot chocolate for instance - nurture yourself.
Hugs xx

[17 yrs of separation]

Debbie, sorry to hear that..(:

[Falling Star]

It seems that one soul always waits for the other to awaken.........Evolve. I am at a place of letting go now........trusting in higher-forces and destiny of souls.
But i can empathise, i too have been on a roller coaster ride.......Felt the pain of seperation but do believe that whatis meant to be........Will be, but all within divine timing. (hugs)

[debbie.b]

thanks you guys. i went back to bed for a few hours & have just got up after having a dream about him!! i was arguing with him & he was making a coffee. i said to him 'your gonna spill that' & he told me f off & as he walked away he spilt it & we both laughed. a friend of mine was there & we were all talking about sedona as we had just been there. i've never been to sedona but i do know sedona is one of the most spiritual places in the world with major energy vortexes. weird to be dreaming of that!
anyway, i feel a bit better now other than a guilt trip cos i should be concentrating on my husband right now :-s

[NightSpirit]

Until your karma is completed with your husband, you will not move on to another. Even if you tried, it would fall to pieces. All things in spiritual nature must flow with the vibration. The greatest purpose for you right now would be to begin your inner journey to meet your soul and acknowledge it as far greater then the debbie you believe you are.

[LadyImpreza1111]

It seems that one soul always waits for the other to awaken.........Evolve. I am at a place of letting go now........trusting in higher-forces and destiny of souls.
But i can empathise, i too have been on a roller coaster ride.......Felt the pain of seperation but do believe that whatis meant to be........Will be, but all within divine timing. (hugs)


Yup. I'm sitting here waiting. I know he's closer than he was even 6 months ago. He was REALLY consumed with ego and at times, I would feel his insecurities during the day. I guess I dealt with that rollercoaster of emotions during the first 6 months of the whole separation. I could never really tell what was his and what was mine. My emotions used to shift from one extreme to the next each day and I was so exhausted. It didn't help that I had a friend at the time who was extremely moody and I empathically picked up on her too. I was empathic with everyone. Thankfully I feel him more often than anyone else now.

I rarely felt the pain of separation because I know that he's always a part of me and that separation was an illusion all along...... but I use to have moments when I needed comforting, he was the first person who came to mind and to just think about him calmed me. Its a blessing indeed to know that no matter what trials and tribulations you endure in this life.........there is someone who also carries your burden at the same time and you are not ever truly alone. Yeah. You might have family and friends who are there for you, but they don't know you inside and out the way your twin does.

I'd say the past few months have been the most calm. I don't feel his insecurities anymore and I've connected with him even more in dreams than I ever did in the beginning. Now I don't enjoy staying up too late anymore because when I do, my quality of sleep suffers and I don't "hear" from him. Each night, I go to sleep with a sense of anticipation. Also I'm no longer friends with that one friend so now when I feel emotions, I can be more confident that they are his or mine. So for now, life is pretty good.

I'm still waiting though. Its been almost a year but at least the time has gone quickly. For that I'm grateful.

[debbie.b]

that's what did my head in, i never knew who's emotion was who's. mine or his. he has mental health probs as it is & i took on that part too, i really thought i had lost the plot. that's the easiest part of no contact, i'm back to my old self!!! what does it for me though is that yeah, he is the only one who knows me inside out & we would chat for hours on end about stuff we couldn't tell anyone else. that's what i miss now, just to txt him 'matt come chat i need you' & he would be there......how does it make sense that someone can drive you that crazy but you can't do without them??!!

[LadyImpreza1111]

My former friend and her twin fought like crazy but they always did their best to make it work. Looking back, I think any of her toxic moods were probably because of him. I also had a karmic soulmate (near twin) before meeting my twin and he was extremely negative, depressed and his moods affected me all the time. There were days when I wanted to kill myself.


It sucks when you are empathic and you pick up on your twin (though I can't complain too much because he's pretty mellow now), your friends, some family and perfect strangers all in one day. I was SOOOOO moody at the beginning.I get drained all the time. Part of it is being emotionally drained, and another part of it is not sleeping well half the time. I remember one day a woman came in where I worked and I've never seen her before in my life, didn't even look at her right away except out of the corner of my eye, but I knew she was grieving. And then she just out of the blue started talking about hearing a song on the radio on her way to the store and she was just bawling the whole way because she had a 21-year-old daughter who just recently passed away and that was her favorite song and she was desperate to find it. When I finally realized what it was I wanted to say to comfort her, she had already left and I haven't seen her since.

And then another time, there was a guy who was shot and killed (leaving behind a wife and 2 kids) at a mall in town. He was one of 4 boys in a family of 6 kids and one of 3 that was shot and killed. The last remaining son was shot in the eye I believe and now he is blind. And I've read about violence in the newspaper constantly to the point where I'm almost desensitized to it now. Yet when I read the article about how not just him, but his 2 siblings were killed, I SWEAR I felt the grief of his whole family bearing down on me at once and I just started crying my eyes out in the middle of work. And for a while I couldn't go through that part of the mall where he was killed because I felt his energy there too. I was cold, and sad when I walked through it.

Being empathic is a blessing when its accurate and you can make all the difference in someone else's day but it takes its toll on you. I am 25 and I feel like I'm in my 80's.

I know this is a gift I was given for a reason but I have days when I wish it was just my twin I felt.

[mystical]

that's what did my head in, i never knew who's emotion was who's. mine or his. he has mental health probs as it is & i took on that part too, i really thought i had lost the plot. that's the easiest part of no contact, i'm back to my old self!!! what does it for me though is that yeah, he is the only one who knows me inside out & we would chat for hours on end about stuff we couldn't tell anyone else. that's what i miss now, just to txt him 'matt come chat i need you' & he would be there......how does it make sense that someone can drive you that crazy but you can't do without them??!!

ya know i find myself now asking when peopel go thro this twin conenction do they really have a mental illenss? i was diagnosed with pts n so was he , he also is bi polar also yet more n more im hearing of the less ev0lved twin having a mental illness ....thats what drove me mental also cos all the while i was feeling my emotions i too was certain i was FEELING him , even tho i never knew bout twins that was just a knwoing i had, i too miss the simplicity of just chattin at times when im down all i need is just one word , hello form him n my whole life would pick right up , when i split with my kids dad eveyrione was against me but ya know what i didnt care as long as me and twin were ok , it wasnt about the sexual side or the loving hugs it was just knowing he was at the end of the line either on email or text , as for being drove crazy but still not being able to live without them im still trying to find that out myself lol xxx

[debbie.b]

exactly.....i've only just recently found out about the whole tf thing. we knew we were probably soulmates but after reading about tf it all resonated with us. he even agreed but then said only time will tell.....i suppose he was right!!! but yeah, he has bipolar & suffers psychotic episodes now & again. makes me wonder if they are like that because their brain can't handle the power of their soul!?

[17 yrs of separation]

Are you feeling better today? kisses

[NightSpirit]

There are so many similarities in my story when I read these posts..including mystical's last post. I truly don't know what to say anymore. As I read, these things flood back to me. On Monday just gone by, its been now 3yrs since my husband passed and still some days I can hate him for the things we both had to endure. These details aren't important, but what is important is, my greatest soul learning came from this period and I feel blessed for that.
I've noticed a syncronicity with my life's flow though. As one man left my life, another came straight in on its tail (3 in total) and in my 58yrs, I feel I've always been looked after by something beyond. My first husband, for 35yrs, then my [tf] for 6yrs, then my earth angel for 2.5yrs. But my [tf] husband period could only be described as surreal and still feels that way to this day. It was so intense that I could never begin to describe its dynamics to anyone. I simply keep it in me to take with me when I also go. It's pointless to do otherwise, because trying to describe any of it makes it sound fairytale-ish and loses the value of its dynamics.
Anyway, its nice to reminisce with you all by reading what you've shared...thanks

[debbie.b]

Are you feeling better today? kisses

hey sweety, felt better as the day went on. it's near on my bedtime now!! oh & thanks for compliment about my children!!
luvs ya :tongue:

[MsSassy]

I have also found that the seperation from these bonds is somewhat of a grieving process. Many of us have been together in our previous lifetime whereby we were seperated by death. So.........These bonds prove the truth of eternal life.
All part of the spiritual awakening process......And although we might feel blinded by pain there is a much higher purpose involved.

Wow, just awesome words!!

[Lilly82]

Firstly, I said in another thread that I don't think anymore that my whatever-he-was is a twin flame... well, I don't know, I have no way of knowing for sure what it is; it's just something. I just still have an overwhelming unconditional love for him and a burning conviction that we met for a reason, and that one day we will know each other better and all will be explained. Somehow I can't get rid of that conviction no matter how hard I try, and I'm tired of fighting it, so I'll just let it remain buried in my heart. Maybe it's right, maybe it isn't. Let the heart love; the brain will try to move on.

So on a personal level I'm too tired to wonder anymore, but on a theoretical level I'd like to ask something. The side of my brain that deals with matters of rationality and justice struggles to understand so many things.

I can get that twin flame connections might sometimes be there to teach us hard lessons, instead of twin flames complementing each other and helping each other become better human beings and more understanding, loving souls. I get that twin flames don't always end up together, for a million possible reasons, and that it wouldn't even always be best for them to do so.

It just seems a tad unfair that one party seems to suffer so much more than the other one... and that, if this forum is anything to go by, in a majority of cases the woman is the one who forgives everything unconditionally and waits beyond any reasonable hope. Women are the ones to learn a crucial lesson of patience - so what do the men learn?

Even if the patient party is not the woman (I swear I'm not trying to make this out into a feminist issue) it seems to be a bit lopsided anyway. Sometimes obviously people might be deluded about their "twin flames", thinking there's a mutual connection when it's just an unrequited infatuation on the ardent believer's part. But, theoretically, if there is indeed a real twin flame connection, does the "runner" feel anything? Does he or she ever feel this bad and wonder why? Does he ever get the powerful urge to contact or meet the other one, does he ever miss her so much his heart would break, does he ever dream of her and wake up so confused he bursts into unexplained tears? Does he ever think of her at all?

I just can't help thinking - IF there is a real connection, and if it's there for a reason, it must feel intense for the runner as well. Even if he doesn't understand it, even if he tries to forget about it, he must feel it. And if he does feel it, how CAN he resist replying to the twin flame's approaches (be it a letter, email, anything)? Even if he doesn't think it's wise or even if he's scared by the intensity, how can he resist the magnetic pull? Nobody is that strong - especially not someone who isn't spiritually mature, and I assume "runners" usually aren't, from what I've read on this forum.

(In my own case I've told myself a million times that I was wrong, that he must have felt nothing at all and that I must have been wrong about the whole thing. But then I remember that he was the one who "started it" - I remember the way his eyes would be drawn to me whenever I was around and the way he always happened to be where I was, I remember the startled depth of his stares and the way his head turned as if drawn by a magnet whenever I walked past. So he must have felt something, considering that I'm not the kind of bombshell stunner that would normally inspire such reactions! I just struggle to understand how you go from that to not wanting to hear anything more about the object of this magnetic pull. Even basic human curiosity would be compelling, if nothing else. And a lot of you have told about closer relations, about actually knowing your twin flames intimately and then them just disappearing out of your lives for good. Never mind whether it's wrong of them to do so to you, but how can they bear it?)

[NightSpirit]

Firstly, I said in another thread that I don't think anymore that my whatever-he-was is a twin flame... well, I don't know, I have no way of knowing for sure what it is; it's just something. I just still have an overwhelming unconditional love for him and a burning conviction that we met for a reason, and that one day we will know each other better and all will be explained. Somehow I can't get rid of that conviction no matter how hard I try, and I'm tired of fighting it, so I'll just let it remain buried in my heart. Maybe it's right, maybe it isn't. Let the heart love; the brain will try to move on.


This is an excellent idea for your own sanity....



I can get that twin flame connections might sometimes be there to teach us hard lessons, instead of twin flames complementing each other and helping each other become better human beings and more understanding, loving souls. I get that twin flames don't always end up together, for a million possible reasons, and that it wouldn't even always be best for them to do so.


In my case we were complementary. By what I read here, I must be one of the lucky ones. Yes, you're right, there are so many extenuating circumstances...but this i'm starting to notice...there's a trend happening lately (or is it that it's just come to my attention now?), that more and more are meeting their tf before both parties are ready. This intrigues me...I'm still working on that one.


It just seems a tad unfair that one party seems to suffer so much more than the other one... and that, if this forum is anything to go by, in a majority of cases the woman is the one who forgives everything unconditionally and waits beyond any reasonable hope. Women are the ones to learn a crucial lesson of patience - so what do the men learn?


mmm..I think its more that women are the more open ones, willing to speak on forums and such....men don't tend to seek out advise so easily. So maybe that's why the majority seems to be women.

Sometimes obviously people might be deluded about their "twin flames", thinking there's a mutual connection when it's just an unrequited infatuation on the ardent believer's part. But, theoretically, if there is indeed a real twin flame connection, does the "runner" feel anything?

I imagine he/she does to some degree. Everyone is different and handles emotion in different ways. We cant possibly know how the other feels...it would be only speculation.


I just can't help thinking - IF there is a real connection, and if it's there for a reason, it must feel intense for the runner as well. Even if he doesn't understand it, even if he tries to forget about it, he must feel it. And if he does feel it, how CAN he resist replying to the twin flame's approaches (be it a letter, email, anything)? Even if he doesn't think it's wise or even if he's scared by the intensity, how can he resist the magnetic pull? Nobody is that strong - especially not someone who isn't spiritually mature, and I assume "runners" usually aren't, from what I've read on this forum.


Regardless of how you feel yourself, others have the ability to shut down their emotions. For me, the time was right and both of us had done the preceding work needed to allow us to come together. Each case is different.

But then I remember that he was the one who "started it"

It could be that he simply wasn't ready for the intensity of it, or that he had other committments over-riding you being together. If the spirit is not willing to do the work together then its not going to happen. I believe I wrote you an explaination on your other thread about what the twin-flame phenomenum entails? When you are ready, then you will bring into your life the mirror of your soul. If this is this man, then there's still work to be done. Sorry......


And a lot of you have told about closer relations, about actually knowing your twin flames intimately and then them just disappearing out of your lives for good. Never mind whether it's wrong of them to do so to you, but how can they bear it?)


I have no answer to this because this is not in my own experience.

Bless.....:hug3:

[SunSister]

It just seems a tad unfair that one party seems to suffer so much more than the other one... and that, if this forum is anything to go by, in a majority of cases the woman is the one who forgives everything unconditionally and waits beyond any reasonable hope. Women are the ones to learn a crucial lesson of patience - so what do the men learn?

I agree with you on that first bit. It is unfair. :smile: On the other hand, I too have noticed the trend that women seem to be more aware or more willing to speak up about twin flames. However, there are also those among us who aren't willing to forgive everything unconditionally and who aren't going to wait around forever. I'm one of those women. Yes, I have a TF and it pains me to not have him in my life the way it used to be. At the same time, I'm glad that I no longer have to put up with all the damage he does to himself and his environment. That's somebody else's job now and I don't envy her one bit. Rationally speaking, I know I am better off without him right now. It doesn't make the hurt from separation any less painful, but it also doesn't mean that I'm going to spend my life waiting around for somebody who might never come 'round again.

Sometimes obviously people might be deluded about their "twin flames", thinking there's a mutual connection when it's just an unrequited infatuation on the ardent believer's part. But, theoretically, if there is indeed a real twin flame connection, does the "runner" feel anything? Does he or she ever feel this bad and wonder why? Does he ever get the powerful urge to contact or meet the other one, does he ever miss her so much his heart would break, does he ever dream of her and wake up so confused he bursts into unexplained tears? Does he ever think of her at all?

I agree, again, and I have thought for the longest time after that separation that this was the case with me. However, the connection doesn't lie and it was something that was recognised by him as well. He became the 'runner' precisely because he felt the connection between us and didn't know what to do with that. I don't know if he ever gets the urge to contact or meet me, but he has sought me out before and contacts me some weeks/months after I dropped him a line through e-mail. I know he hurts, sometimes, and that he thinks of me as I think of him. It's not a constant ache, with us, because we're still aware that we have each other through the connection and through our astral travels. We're not fully separate, which makes it easier to bear.

I just can't help thinking - IF there is a real connection, and if it's there for a reason, it must feel intense for the runner as well. Even if he doesn't understand it, even if he tries to forget about it, he must feel it. And if he does feel it, how CAN he resist replying to the twin flame's approaches (be it a letter, email, anything)? Even if he doesn't think it's wise or even if he's scared by the intensity, how can he resist the magnetic pull? Nobody is that strong - especially not someone who isn't spiritually mature, and I assume "runners" usually aren't, from what I've read on this forum.
...
And a lot of you have told about closer relations, about actually knowing your twin flames intimately and then them just disappearing out of your lives for good. Never mind whether it's wrong of them to do so to you, but how can they bear it?

It is intense, yes. It's a feeling that will stick with them just as much as it sticks with us. I think there are a number of things that enable them to resist the approaches, of which the most important is probably fear and maybe even distrust. My TF has been hurt and 'discarded' by so many people in his life that he cannot trust or accept that the love I give is unconditional and genuine. There are a lot of issues on his part that enable him to move away, even if he feels deep in his heart that he doesn't really want to.

He and I first met in the physical and actually worked together for quite some time. We dealt with each other online on top of all that. A set of circumstances separated us in the physical and he's not the type of person to come online often and talk. Yet, I know he hasn't disappeared out of my life for good. I know where he lives and I know how to find him if anything ever happens. I know he would always, always respond if something was truly amiss and I needed his help. It's the same on his end. He knows I'm here to contact and meet if anything's the matter. He knows that I will always open my door for him and let him in if he needs it. That's what makes it bearable for us. It's not full separation. It's being away from each other to grow and move on with our lives so that we can give this world the best it deserves. :smile: We know that we're always going to be standing on the edge of the world at the end of all things together.

[debbie.b]

well, i had an email this morning from matt........telling me that he always believed he needed me to further his awakening but he was wrong.....wished me well & that was it.

[NightSpirit]

well, i had an email this morning from matt........telling me that he always believed he needed me to further his awakening but he was wrong.....wished me well & that was it.

LOL..sorry...the laugh is not at your expense...I just can't believe he said that. Well then, he is not your tf...because there's never a doubt and you only come together when you're awakened...HUGS

[debbie.b]

i've said before he is still very ego based. i know him, he says these things for his own benefit to make himself feel good thinking he doesn't need me. he's done it before then relapsed himself so i'm just going to let him work through whatever he has to.

[NightSpirit]

If he is your tf then whatever he reflects back to you, is the shadow-edge of your own soul...awakening. This is what its all about...the shadow work you have not yet realised...yes!...its difficult to comprehend and yet its there for you to look at. You may never understand it because its so deeply embedded in your past. Can you see any recognition of any part of this within yourself?...it's truth time if you feel this is a right connection.

[SpiritStarFly1]

Firstly, I said in another thread that I don't think anymore that my whatever-he-was is a twin flame... well, I don't know, I have no way of knowing for sure what it is; it's just something. I just still have an overwhelming unconditional love for him and a burning conviction that we met for a reason, and that one day we will know each other better and all will be explained. Somehow I can't get rid of that conviction no matter how hard I try, and I'm tired of fighting it, so I'll just let it remain buried in my heart. Maybe it's right, maybe it isn't. Let the heart love; the brain will try to move on.

So on a personal level I'm too tired to wonder anymore, but on a theoretical level I'd like to ask something. The side of my brain that deals with matters of rationality and justice struggles to understand so many things.

I can get that twin flame connections might sometimes be there to teach us hard lessons, instead of twin flames complementing each other and helping each other become better human beings and more understanding, loving souls. I get that twin flames don't always end up together, for a million possible reasons, and that it wouldn't even always be best for them to do so.

It just seems a tad unfair that one party seems to suffer so much more than the other one... and that, if this forum is anything to go by, in a majority of cases the woman is the one who forgives everything unconditionally and waits beyond any reasonable hope. Women are the ones to learn a crucial lesson of patience - so what do the men learn?

Even if the patient party is not the woman (I swear I'm not trying to make this out into a feminist issue) it seems to be a bit lopsided anyway. Sometimes obviously people might be deluded about their "twin flames", thinking there's a mutual connection when it's just an unrequited infatuation on the ardent believer's part. But, theoretically, if there is indeed a real twin flame connection, does the "runner" feel anything? Does he or she ever feel this bad and wonder why? Does he ever get the powerful urge to contact or meet the other one, does he ever miss her so much his heart would break, does he ever dream of her and wake up so confused he bursts into unexplained tears? Does he ever think of her at all?

I just can't help thinking - IF there is a real connection, and if it's there for a reason, it must feel intense for the runner as well. Even if he doesn't understand it, even if he tries to forget about it, he must feel it. And if he does feel it, how CAN he resist replying to the twin flame's approaches (be it a letter, email, anything)? Even if he doesn't think it's wise or even if he's scared by the intensity, how can he resist the magnetic pull? Nobody is that strong - especially not someone who isn't spiritually mature, and I assume "runners" usually aren't, from what I've read on this forum.

(In my own case I've told myself a million times that I was wrong, that he must have felt nothing at all and that I must have been wrong about the whole thing. But then I remember that he was the one who "started it" - I remember the way his eyes would be drawn to me whenever I was around and the way he always happened to be where I was, I remember the startled depth of his stares and the way his head turned as if drawn by a magnet whenever I walked past. So he must have felt something, considering that I'm not the kind of bombshell stunner that would normally inspire such reactions! I just struggle to understand how you go from that to not wanting to hear anything more about the object of this magnetic pull. Even basic human curiosity would be compelling, if nothing else. And a lot of you have told about closer relations, about actually knowing your twin flames intimately and then them just disappearing out of your lives for good. Never mind whether it's wrong of them to do so to you, but how can they bear it?)
This says everything I have been thinking. Thank you so much. I'm sorry I can't answer your questions, but believe me, I truly ask these questions over and over again. I wonder if I am deluding myself and often feel as if I am one of those who has this major crush on someone, it is totally unrequited and I'm just a nutcase lol BUT, I experienced something for myself. The way we just connected, had to spend time in each others aura as if synchronising energies, the way we had such opposing views. The way his eyes were almost a mirror image of mine. I saw something in his eyes the day I told him I was leaving my job (see my other posts for details), the way he behaved with me on my last shift, the amount of emails he sent me afterwards.... And then nothing now for three weeks. This overwhelming urge to contact him, go see him, spend time with him. The random times I just feel like bursting into tears - why? Where is all this coming from? And, as you ask - does he feel this, really? And, as you say, if he is not necessarily spiritually aware (he isnt), why not then try to contact me? Text me, email me or even respond to my last FB message?If anyone has any credible answers please please share :)

[mystical]

LOL..sorry...the laugh is not at your expense...I just can't believe he said that. Well then, he is not your tf...because there's never a doubt and you only come together when you're awakened...HUGS

i dotn really believe that because my twin is just the same , and i knwo beyond a shadow of a doubt that HE IS MY TWIN not a karmic soul mate not a soul mate but my twin , i think maybe his ego is present here or maybe he is trying to convionvce her he doesnt need her when he does ,maybe he is doesnt need her , i mean aferall thats our main lesson here isnt here to know that we dont NEED ANOTHER? my twin always said he didnt love me or need me but turns out he did he admitted that himself , i met my tiwn when i was not even fully awakened he bought me on mor well the separations did , but and altho i have progressed he still hasnt n still pretty much in the same place as he was with a little bit of progression ,

i think its wrong to put doubt in her mind esp when we all battle with ourselves as it is , we spend so long trying to vaLIDATE what we feel and know already

maybe the time is not right yet deb , maybe he still needs to prgress further , let him find his own path and what will be will be, only u can know if he is your twin flame

[debbie.b]

i dotn really believe that because my twin is just the same , and i knwo beyond a shadow of a doubt that HE IS MY TWIN not a karmic soul mate not a soul mate but my twin , i think maybe his ego is present here or maybe he is trying to convionvce her he doesnt need her when he does ,maybe he is doesnt need her , i mena aferall thats our main lesson eher isnt here to know that we dont NEED ANOTHER? my twin always said he didnt love me or need me but turns out he did he admitted that himself , i met my tiwn when i was even fully awakened and altho i have progressed he still hasnt n stioll pretty much in the same place as he was with a little bit of progression ,

i think its wrong to put doubt in her mind esp when we all battle with ourselves as it is , we spend so long trying to vaLIDATE what we feel and know already

maybe the time is not right yet deb , maybe he still needs to prgress further , let him find his own path and what will be will be, only u can know if he is your twin flame

exactly how i see it & exactly how it has been in my situation & you know what.........i sent him another email & ended it by saying 'what will be will be' lol

[mystical]

lol , i think that right now he needs to find himself deb just like my twin , we have done all we can all we cna do is be there to suppirt them when they need us too ,

[NightSpirit]

http://harusami.com/soul2soul/twinsoul.html (http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/redir.php?link=http%3A%2F%2Fharusami.com%2Fsoul2so ul%2Ftwinsoul.html)

His birthday was 2/12...mine is 11/2. We married 11/1. He passed on the 22/11. And 11.11 was a dominant feature in our life together.

http://star.goddess.tripod.com/twinflame2.html (http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/redir.php?link=http%3A%2F%2Fstar.goddess.tripod.co m%2Ftwinflame2.html)


Edited: To add another link

[LadyImpreza1111]

Yup. That last paragraph of that article is specifically for those who are in pain.

[NightSpirit]

http://www.soulevolution.org/twinflames/twinflames.htm