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Dharma Employee
12-11-2010, 10:12 PM
can this be

its a strange feeling

it suddenly felt very healing and unconcerned with her, which was strange to feel and got me doubting again as this was more in the body

LadyImpreza1111
12-11-2010, 10:37 PM
It will come and go. I haven't thought of twin too much today but that is because I'm just drained and can barely focus on work as it is.

Dharma Employee
13-11-2010, 11:15 AM
i am now questioning whether this was all it was meant to be and then i was suppose to move on as today, I don't feel any of it anymore and it is kinda confusing

I was going to go and find her tommorrow at this dance venue, she is guaranteed to be at, and either give her the invite to the party or the invite with the letter

am leaning on just the invite

thing is, I not even sure I care today at all

it feels like all this feelings and fixation is fading into nothing and I am even questioning if it was just brief flash of something

we have not spoke for about 5 weeks but I just feel, whatever which would lead one to conclude that it was just a flash of something and now it has gone

Jules
13-11-2010, 12:26 PM
it feels like all this feelings and fixation is fading into nothing and I am even questioning if it was just brief flash of something
I'm not denying your feelings for one minute, and don't want to belittle what your belief is at all. We each of us have our own truths and perceptions. And who am I to say what you feel is anything other than this. I'm not. But what I would like to say, and this is to Lady Imp as well, try to learn to let go. Live for the now. If it's meant to be in this lifetime it will be. But by being so sad and downhearted, and not being able to see beyond this, you are dishonouring yourselves and your tf's. You are fully aware they have their journey's to go through just as you have yours. If you are truly meant to be together at this time it wouldnt' be this painful,would it? The best advice I can give anyone is to go with your gut instinct.
If you want to give her the invite then go with that. Personally I think that would be the best option, if she says no, then you know where you stand and you don't need to send the letter, Just remember. Whatever happens, everything is perfect in the moment.
Namaste
Jue xx

glenos
13-11-2010, 12:37 PM
Gawd Jue, six hundred and how many posts since rebirth.., what your phone bills are like is anyones guess. lol

My take on it:-

I see birds(!) on the bus, up the town, down the pub or whereve,r and we often exchange a "hello"in a pheronomic kinda way. We aknowledge one another in a miriad of ways. I used to think that some kind of higher level magic had happened and that she's "the one" etc. Having tried a few of these vibes out I realise that it was nothing more than the age old boy meets girl syndrome going off. As you get older (ahem) and wiser (double ahem) one tends to look past this kind of stuff and see it for what it is. To meet your TF on the earth-plane is rare, to have a TF who is of the same sex is rare, and to know that you have met is rarer still.
All I can say is that it will "work itself out in the end". Concentrate on building your own power and if some one turns up with their own power the that's to the good, but a Twin Flame at every turn? Nahh.

G.

LadyImpreza1111
13-11-2010, 07:51 PM
I HAVE learned to let go. I would be happy for my twin if he thought he could be happy with someone else.......but I also sense that OUR story is far from over and unlike Dharma, I don't struggle with any pain at all. And I never did in the almost year since I first got in contact with my twin.

Dharma Employee
14-11-2010, 12:41 AM
i have never rushed to call it anything glenos, but found this stuff the most apt and direct to what I have been experiencing, but have rarely if at all used the word twin flame but much of the time, settled on soul connection

jules, never my direct intention, to be downhearted and sad as such but this has affected me a lot more than anything else i can recall for a very long time, hence the desire to understand

psychoslice
14-11-2010, 01:48 AM
Hi Dharma Employee, it sounds like you are spiritually maturing, you are moving on from a love you though you had to a deeper Love that you always had but just never Realized you had it, in this case a SM or TF can act as a catalyst.

yes
15-11-2010, 09:51 AM
Hi Dharma Employee, it sounds like you are spiritually maturing, you are moving on from a love you though you had to a deeper Love that you always had but just never Realized you had it, in this case a SM or TF can act as a catalyst.

I agree with this, but the moving on might not necessarily be permanent. The realization might be a temporary relief and the attachment to the individual person might come back ever stronger.

psychoslice
15-11-2010, 10:07 AM
I agree with this, but the moving on might not necessarily be permanent. The realization might be a temporary relief and the attachment to the individual person might come back ever stronger.
In true Realization this wont happen, the relationship has been seen for what it was, just an attachment, just like growing up and realizing your teddy bear isn't real, try going back and pretending its real again, I just wont be the same.

Dharma Employee
15-11-2010, 11:25 AM
mmm, well, It was my birthday yesterday

had a few drinks at the dance venue, which had a bar

, danced with her for the first time in 6 weeks, gave her an invite to my birthday bash this week and gave her the opportunity to email me, text me or write me, her rsvp, with a note, saying, please respond in a way that is most comfortable for you

i walked away shortly after giving her the invite, she was behind me at one point, but didn't let me know

I am not going dancing this week, so will have to either email me, text me or write me her response

I completely regret doing it now

should never have invited her

SpiritStarFly1
15-11-2010, 11:30 AM
Hey

Good for you - you gave her the invite and have now left it up to her. How did you feel when you saw her/danced with her for the first time in 6 weeks?

Don't regret your decision to give her the invite. If she comes along, then great. If she doesn't, don't be too hard on yourself. Concentrate on having a great birthday regardless :smile:

Dharma Employee
15-11-2010, 11:59 AM
it felt nice to see her again though still felt, there was some edginess on ocassion

for all i know she is just an attention junkie

she obvioulsy knew i was there for her

I never normally go to that dance venue unless we have a thing happen

SpiritStarFly1
15-11-2010, 12:10 PM
It was something you had to do - it is all to do with that pull we have with these people. Your connection with her is telling you an awful lot about yourself, and how you handle things, such as relationships. Even if you two never get together (and it may just be that that is the case), this connection has taught you so much about yourself.

You hit on something I can identify with when you said "shs is just an attention junkie". The guy I have a connection with simply thrives on attention. If, when I was working with him, I hadnt paid as much attention to him as he would have liked he would do something to ensure I did - bang stuff around, do a silly dance etc. And he knew I would be the one to target 100% all my attention straight on him. Thing is, that was one of the things I loved about him *sigh*

mystical
15-11-2010, 12:21 PM
dharma (((((hugs ))))) u have done the hardest part for now , try and ove on in the meantimte and feel pleased with urself for sending it even if she rejects it , i can understand how nervous u felt as i keep menaing to wirte to my twin flame but as of yet the words dont seem to flow so guess not the right time as yet , keep sendin out positive thoughts to this and try not to think oh she wont come as u will then block the intention , its up to her now xx

Dharma Employee
15-11-2010, 02:30 PM
well I have been thinking all morning between crying, on and off, please dont come

since all this happened my drinking has increased

I have been smoking more when drunk

I still am struggling to care about me and my space/company

SpiritStarFly1
15-11-2010, 04:01 PM
I understand the increased drinking too. And I bet you haven't got the appetite for food either.

And I totally understand where you are coming from worrying now that you have given her the invite. Just after I last saw my soul connection, I went home and (after one or two drinks) emailed him to basically tell him that I was never going to work with him again, that I would miss him terribly, and if he should ever be at a loose end, to text me and we will meet for coffee.

I've heard nothing since. But each day that goes by, even though I feel sometimes as if my soul as been ripped apart, I know that at the moment, this is how it has to be. If he was still contacting me I would be right there, emotionally involved and a complete emotional wreck. Him not contacting me has enabled me to try moving on, getting re-focussed on what I am meant to be doing. it doesnt stop me from thinking about him, doesnt stop me from wanting to see him, doesnt stop me from wanting to cry (although this is getting slightly easier as time passes).

Don't beat yourself up - I do hope you find peace soon:smile:

mystical
15-11-2010, 04:30 PM
well I have been thinking all morning between crying, on and off, please dont come

since all this happened my drinking has increased

I have been smoking more when drunk

I still am struggling to care about me and my space/company


when my twin left this last time , i turned to alcohol , it was never sumthing i really enjoyed and to be honest i detested the smell on others it really repulsed me , but i drank because by cutting him off i needed to feeling that warmth within , i guess i tried to substitute the feeling taht he gave me , i never got drunk tho just enough to get very merry so i felt happy , but ist the wrong route to go down , i found altho a pain killer and a bit of a sub i actually became reliant on it and began to drink a whol;e bottle of malibu a day it cost em a fortune and i mustve smelled of the stuff , i couldnt even go in town without having a drink to calm my nerves but then , one day i got all paranoid n i could smell the dirnk i use to think this was just me craving it but it was actually coming out my pores , yuk , after that it put me off , i mean if i could smell it then everyoneelse could too , after that i began to cleanse my body and detox from several things eat better less smoking and no drink, i dotn regret turning to drink because in a way im glad cos its made me see how bad an effect it can have on our body , now days if i have more than 3 drinks my kidneys play up that tells me i have had my limit

Dharma Employee
15-11-2010, 04:59 PM
yep, well i dont wish to drink, really was generally a one a week/fortnight kind of person untill all this and yet have noticed over the last 4 weeks, it has gone a bit mad

I certainly don't think this is good for me or anything

thanks for your responses

I just miss the days when I was dreaming of a regular romance with this woman though realise, that cant be but do find that a little heartbreaking sometimes

Kaere
15-11-2010, 05:09 PM
mmm, well, It was my birthday yesterday


I don't have much to say about the rest but Happy Birthday!! :occasion15: