Tabitha
18-04-2011, 01:38 PM
Hi everyone. My story is going to be very long, so please bear with me.
First, I have to say that before my story began, I was firmly sitting on the fence regarding all this spirits, life after death stuff and whatnot. I wasn't a scoffer, but I didn't really see how it could be true. I'd had no personal experience to speak of in these matters.
Anyway - my story begins around four to five years ago. There are two tangents to it. Whether or not these two tangents are connected is what's been puzzling me.
I began taking an interest in a singer-songwriter - I'll call him "Gareth" for simplicity's sake. Obviously I don't want to identify him - he was well known enough - if you're British and 40 plus, you may well have heard of him. I had been aware of Gareth during the time his band had a few hit singles, some years earlier, but I hadn't followed his career.
Gareth died some years back now (over ten), in troubled circumstances. Again, I heard the news at the time, but it didn't mean a great deal to me tbh. It wasn't until around five years ago that I "discovered" ,so to speak, his music, and began listening to it properly. I was incredibly moved by it - it's fair to say that it "blew me away", as the saying goes. I began to read properly about Gareth's life and death, and it hit me very hard - I felt as if I were "mourning" him as if he had only recently died iyswim.
My interest in Gareth escalated, and I became involved with a long running fansite of his. I ended up becoming admin of it, and as a result, I came to encounter some of Gareth's family and friends. I also took it upon myself to visit his grave on the anniversaries of his birth and death, to leave flowers for him, on behalf of all us fans. I've managed to do this without fail for the last four years ( he's buried about two hours away from where I live, so getting there isn't a problem for me). It's something I do happily.
On one occasion on the tenth anniversary of his death, when I was in his home city (where he is also buried), I spent that evening with a lady who was a close friend of Gareth and his family. We chatted about Gareth, and she showed me letters and cards etc. that he had written to her, items of his clothing that had been bequeathed to her as mementoes, that sort of thing. It may sound morbid to some, but it was a very special evening for me.
One of my most treasured possessions is a postcard written by Gareth two years before he died, which was gifted to me by another of his friends whom I met a tribute night.
So that is the first tangent to my story - my love of Gareth and his music.
The second tangent -
I have lived in my present home for nine years now. For the first five years of this, I had never experienced anything like paranormal activity in it. Nor had I at any other home I'd lived in previously, and at this time I was thirty six.
So, around four or five years go, some very strange things started to happen. I would be alone in the house, and objects would disappear - I would search everywhere for them, then they would reappear in a place which I know I definitely checked. This completely freaked me out - at this time I had never heard of DOP. I would walk into a room and find that objects were moved halfway across the room from the place in which I knew they were a few minutes earlier. Twice I have had objects just drop down out of the air in front of me, as if someone were hanging from the ceiling, and dropping them down. I have watched my letterbox flapping for several seconds, with nobody at the door, and with no breeze. The lights in our living room dresser will be found switched off, when I know that I switched them on, while everyone insists that they didn't switch them off.
These events have been going on to this day, not all the time, just every few weeks or even months. But enough times for me to realise that I have undoubted paranormal activity in my home. My husband and parents have also witnessed it, so they know it isn't just me going crazy.
To someone like me, who up till then wasn't even sure that spirits actually existed, this was seriously freaky business, you understand. At first I was frightened of it, but as time went by, and I realised that nothing harmful or destructive ever happened - and never has - I grew calmer. I read around, and figured that I obviously had a spirit manifesting itself in my home. The spirit seemed to want my attention - which it has - but I wasn't sure why.
Anyway, two years ago, I met up once more with the lady I mentioned spending an evening with. I mentioned the activity to her, simply because I knew she was a believer in the spirit world, and I didn't know anybody else who was. She immediately suggested that it might be Gareth. This astonished me - I had never made the connection. I never met Gareth when he was alive - so why would he visit me in spirit? It didn't make sense.
Thinking about it, though, there a few possible pointers which seem to suggest it, although apart from the last one, I don't know if they are just coincidences.
First, when a fellow fan and I were walking to Gareth's grave with our flowers, on the tenth anniversary of his death, an animal, of a particular breed, that was closely linked to Gareth, was coming the opposite way along the pavement. It stopped, and looked at us. The guy with me nudged me, and said, "Look, it's a sign from Gareth, it has to be." I told him not be so soft; it was just a coincidence.
Another time, I found that my laptop, which had no desktop image selected at the time - just the default Windows logo - had had a picture of Gareth and his bandmate, on the cover of one of their albums - selected as my desktop image. I didn't do this, and my husband and daughters swear they didn't either. It's only me that uses the laptop - they use the main computer.
Talking of which, I was once using the main computer while my laptop was under repair. I was alone in the house. I had three or four windows open, one of which was a blog entry by one of Gareth's friends and fellow musical collaborators, describing his visit to a medium, in which Gareth's spirit appeared to make contact. I went upstairs, leaving another window from a different website onscreen - definitely not the blog entry. When I returned to the living room, the blog entry was onscreen. Now, I don't know much about computers, but I've never had a minimised window "jump" onto the screen by itself like that before.
I finally decided to visit a medium myself last year, something I'd never done. I have to say that nothing conclusive could be garnered from the meeting. The medium did mention that his first encounter with the spirit world was when he saw the spirit of his deceased pet - which was the very same animal and breed that I mentioned being linked with Gareth. Another coincidence?
And now comes the the real crux, to me, at least. This happened a couple of weeks after my visit to the medium. I had a dream.
The dream described below occurred between 6.20 and 7.00 a.m. one morning, when I was in a half dozing, half awake state.
This is my dream:
In my dream, I was awake - I think. I had, in waking hours, been thinking about who it could be that had been visiting our home over the past four years.
In my dream, whilst "awake", I spoke out loud, did something I have never actually done before - addressed Gareth by name, asked outright if it really were his spirit that was visiting my home.
In response to my address, I began to feel what I can only describe as a humming sound beginning inside my head. The humming grew louder, and eventually it cleared to become a voice, speaking. It sounded as if I were listening to a radio playing inside my head. I shook my head frantically at first, frightened of this "voice" inside my head, trying desperately to get rid of it. Eventually, though, something made me stop, and accept. The voice confirmed to me that the entity that had been manifesting in my house was indeed Gareth. It (the voice) faded, then grew stronger, at intervals, similar to a radio signal fading in and out. More was said, but I couldn't remember what when I woke up. Only the confirmation that it was him, or his spirit, I should say.
Now, I really don't know what to make of this. I could dismiss it as my subconscious, but then I searched on spirit communication - and the first few hits mentioned dreams. So is it possible that Gareth's spirit did indeed communicate with me via my dream?
I'm not scared by any of this, at least not any more, really, just intrigued. I really don't know anything much of this whole spirit world business. I'm not sensitive, or anything like that.
It's not that I'm desperately wanting the spirit to be Gareth's, iyswim. It either is or isn't, and it doesn't really matter - I have proof of spirit existence now - not that I was actually demanding it - and that's what's really important to me. But I can't help being curious. I'd love to know if if it really is Gareth - did I get my answer in my dream, do you think?
If you've got his far, thank you for reading my epic story. I swear every word of it is the truth. Any of your thoughts on it would be greatly appreciated, thank you.
(By the way, I've tried to be as obtuse as possible about Gareth's real identity, but if anybody has worked it out, please don't reveal it, obviously. Thanks.)
First, I have to say that before my story began, I was firmly sitting on the fence regarding all this spirits, life after death stuff and whatnot. I wasn't a scoffer, but I didn't really see how it could be true. I'd had no personal experience to speak of in these matters.
Anyway - my story begins around four to five years ago. There are two tangents to it. Whether or not these two tangents are connected is what's been puzzling me.
I began taking an interest in a singer-songwriter - I'll call him "Gareth" for simplicity's sake. Obviously I don't want to identify him - he was well known enough - if you're British and 40 plus, you may well have heard of him. I had been aware of Gareth during the time his band had a few hit singles, some years earlier, but I hadn't followed his career.
Gareth died some years back now (over ten), in troubled circumstances. Again, I heard the news at the time, but it didn't mean a great deal to me tbh. It wasn't until around five years ago that I "discovered" ,so to speak, his music, and began listening to it properly. I was incredibly moved by it - it's fair to say that it "blew me away", as the saying goes. I began to read properly about Gareth's life and death, and it hit me very hard - I felt as if I were "mourning" him as if he had only recently died iyswim.
My interest in Gareth escalated, and I became involved with a long running fansite of his. I ended up becoming admin of it, and as a result, I came to encounter some of Gareth's family and friends. I also took it upon myself to visit his grave on the anniversaries of his birth and death, to leave flowers for him, on behalf of all us fans. I've managed to do this without fail for the last four years ( he's buried about two hours away from where I live, so getting there isn't a problem for me). It's something I do happily.
On one occasion on the tenth anniversary of his death, when I was in his home city (where he is also buried), I spent that evening with a lady who was a close friend of Gareth and his family. We chatted about Gareth, and she showed me letters and cards etc. that he had written to her, items of his clothing that had been bequeathed to her as mementoes, that sort of thing. It may sound morbid to some, but it was a very special evening for me.
One of my most treasured possessions is a postcard written by Gareth two years before he died, which was gifted to me by another of his friends whom I met a tribute night.
So that is the first tangent to my story - my love of Gareth and his music.
The second tangent -
I have lived in my present home for nine years now. For the first five years of this, I had never experienced anything like paranormal activity in it. Nor had I at any other home I'd lived in previously, and at this time I was thirty six.
So, around four or five years go, some very strange things started to happen. I would be alone in the house, and objects would disappear - I would search everywhere for them, then they would reappear in a place which I know I definitely checked. This completely freaked me out - at this time I had never heard of DOP. I would walk into a room and find that objects were moved halfway across the room from the place in which I knew they were a few minutes earlier. Twice I have had objects just drop down out of the air in front of me, as if someone were hanging from the ceiling, and dropping them down. I have watched my letterbox flapping for several seconds, with nobody at the door, and with no breeze. The lights in our living room dresser will be found switched off, when I know that I switched them on, while everyone insists that they didn't switch them off.
These events have been going on to this day, not all the time, just every few weeks or even months. But enough times for me to realise that I have undoubted paranormal activity in my home. My husband and parents have also witnessed it, so they know it isn't just me going crazy.
To someone like me, who up till then wasn't even sure that spirits actually existed, this was seriously freaky business, you understand. At first I was frightened of it, but as time went by, and I realised that nothing harmful or destructive ever happened - and never has - I grew calmer. I read around, and figured that I obviously had a spirit manifesting itself in my home. The spirit seemed to want my attention - which it has - but I wasn't sure why.
Anyway, two years ago, I met up once more with the lady I mentioned spending an evening with. I mentioned the activity to her, simply because I knew she was a believer in the spirit world, and I didn't know anybody else who was. She immediately suggested that it might be Gareth. This astonished me - I had never made the connection. I never met Gareth when he was alive - so why would he visit me in spirit? It didn't make sense.
Thinking about it, though, there a few possible pointers which seem to suggest it, although apart from the last one, I don't know if they are just coincidences.
First, when a fellow fan and I were walking to Gareth's grave with our flowers, on the tenth anniversary of his death, an animal, of a particular breed, that was closely linked to Gareth, was coming the opposite way along the pavement. It stopped, and looked at us. The guy with me nudged me, and said, "Look, it's a sign from Gareth, it has to be." I told him not be so soft; it was just a coincidence.
Another time, I found that my laptop, which had no desktop image selected at the time - just the default Windows logo - had had a picture of Gareth and his bandmate, on the cover of one of their albums - selected as my desktop image. I didn't do this, and my husband and daughters swear they didn't either. It's only me that uses the laptop - they use the main computer.
Talking of which, I was once using the main computer while my laptop was under repair. I was alone in the house. I had three or four windows open, one of which was a blog entry by one of Gareth's friends and fellow musical collaborators, describing his visit to a medium, in which Gareth's spirit appeared to make contact. I went upstairs, leaving another window from a different website onscreen - definitely not the blog entry. When I returned to the living room, the blog entry was onscreen. Now, I don't know much about computers, but I've never had a minimised window "jump" onto the screen by itself like that before.
I finally decided to visit a medium myself last year, something I'd never done. I have to say that nothing conclusive could be garnered from the meeting. The medium did mention that his first encounter with the spirit world was when he saw the spirit of his deceased pet - which was the very same animal and breed that I mentioned being linked with Gareth. Another coincidence?
And now comes the the real crux, to me, at least. This happened a couple of weeks after my visit to the medium. I had a dream.
The dream described below occurred between 6.20 and 7.00 a.m. one morning, when I was in a half dozing, half awake state.
This is my dream:
In my dream, I was awake - I think. I had, in waking hours, been thinking about who it could be that had been visiting our home over the past four years.
In my dream, whilst "awake", I spoke out loud, did something I have never actually done before - addressed Gareth by name, asked outright if it really were his spirit that was visiting my home.
In response to my address, I began to feel what I can only describe as a humming sound beginning inside my head. The humming grew louder, and eventually it cleared to become a voice, speaking. It sounded as if I were listening to a radio playing inside my head. I shook my head frantically at first, frightened of this "voice" inside my head, trying desperately to get rid of it. Eventually, though, something made me stop, and accept. The voice confirmed to me that the entity that had been manifesting in my house was indeed Gareth. It (the voice) faded, then grew stronger, at intervals, similar to a radio signal fading in and out. More was said, but I couldn't remember what when I woke up. Only the confirmation that it was him, or his spirit, I should say.
Now, I really don't know what to make of this. I could dismiss it as my subconscious, but then I searched on spirit communication - and the first few hits mentioned dreams. So is it possible that Gareth's spirit did indeed communicate with me via my dream?
I'm not scared by any of this, at least not any more, really, just intrigued. I really don't know anything much of this whole spirit world business. I'm not sensitive, or anything like that.
It's not that I'm desperately wanting the spirit to be Gareth's, iyswim. It either is or isn't, and it doesn't really matter - I have proof of spirit existence now - not that I was actually demanding it - and that's what's really important to me. But I can't help being curious. I'd love to know if if it really is Gareth - did I get my answer in my dream, do you think?
If you've got his far, thank you for reading my epic story. I swear every word of it is the truth. Any of your thoughts on it would be greatly appreciated, thank you.
(By the way, I've tried to be as obtuse as possible about Gareth's real identity, but if anybody has worked it out, please don't reveal it, obviously. Thanks.)