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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Past Lives & Reincarnation

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  #1  
Old 07-03-2018, 03:25 PM
ValVan ValVan is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2017
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Is it past life karma? What soul connection is it?

There was a guy.
I was deeply in love with him for 3 years.
Our position was a bit complicated.
Year 1 to year 3, we didn't talk, year 4, we talked. And no talk then until year 5.
Year 5, I had a dream of him, and I fell in love with him after that dream, I tried hard to hold my feelings back and tried my best to avoid him. And he showed interest in me and always flirted with me a little bit.
I denied my feelings for him and tried to get in other relationships.
Then he left school.

Why did I do this? I don't know, I just didn't want to face him, when I looked at him, I wanted to run away, I see my defects, my wounds and something I don't want to face when I see him. I can't even look at his pictures.

I told him by email that I liked him. After 6 months, he replied and gave me his address telling me he had moved to other country. Then I never got his reply. Maybe my letter offended him.

I feel that he doesn't care and bother about me. And I decided to move on, why do I still dream of him so often even though I don't think of him? Why did the feelings always came back?
I thought he was my twin flame, but due to his indifference, I started to believe that he was a karmic soulmate, but there's much karma !? There's no take and give? He did nothing wrong to me, and so didn't I.
I almost could get over him, then yesterday, a friend of me just mentioned about him to me, now I started to think about him again, and I keep seeing his name everywhere..
I tried not to think of him, and I almost could get over him. There's pain and I feel hurting when I think of him, why? I'm not obsessed with him anymore, I don't love him anymore, why do I still have feelings for him? Why can't I look at him? Why does he make me face something I hate, something I don't want to see, something I avoid?
I'm afraid of him.
I'm sure there must be something between us. Don't know what it is. If there's karma, what kind of karma is it? What past life did we have together?
It's strange.. I tried not to think about him and move on. And everything was good, then the feelings came back again because my friend talked about him yesterday...

Can I cut cord? I really want to fet over him. Do you think not thinking of him work? I tried to figure out what I'm avoiding and what I actually fear, but can't figure out...
That person... just makes me feel so complicated.. I'm attracted to him at the same time wanting to run away from him.
Did I do something wrong to him in past lives?

By the way, we haven't seen each other for years, but still can't get him out of my mind. I know people say I'm wasting time, but I'm moving on, I control my thoughts, and it almost succeeded..
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  #2  
Old 08-03-2018, 12:18 AM
desert rat desert rat is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Phoenix AZ USA
Posts: 3,350
 
You may or not have shared a past life . Some one you barely talk to? I would say move on find some one else

p.s. your profile says you are 20 . You start talking to this guy at 15 ?
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  #3  
Old 08-03-2018, 02:23 AM
ValVan ValVan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by desert rat
You may or not have shared a past life . Some one you barely talk to? I would say move on find some one else

p.s. your profile says you are 20 . You start talking to this guy at 15 ?

Did I say I didn't want to move on? I said I tried to move on and almost succeeded, then he came back. Do you think I'm not letting go?
Of course I know I may or may not have a past life, there are only 2 possibilities. Did you even say say one word!? What's wrong with being 20?
Yea I barely talk to that person, so what? You think people can only have feelings for people who they always talk to?
U don't understand my position. Well you just don't understand.
I find that your so called opinion doesn't help, thank you and goodbye.

I'll find someone here who can relate to this.
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  #4  
Old 08-03-2018, 01:24 PM
desert rat desert rat is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Phoenix AZ USA
Posts: 3,350
 
I did not mean to make you mad, and yes its hard to know what is going on form just a few lines of text . My point was that I dont think some one that only talks to you a few times over 5 years is looking for much of a love life from you . There are other fish is the sea . There are some guided self hypnosis cds , and mp3 s to take one to a life of your choise . See if you lived a life with some one , or you have karma with that person . I will post a you tube link , some methods work others dont . The ones I have are from D. Sutphen , W. Bulhman , ect.
https://www.youtube.com/results?sear...ife+regression
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  #5  
Old 08-03-2018, 07:28 PM
7luminaries 7luminaries is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,221
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Valvan, hello there...
My 2 p's....

Unless that person is very close soul fam, there is absolutely no way I would tolerate or even feel spiritually inclined toward someone who wasn't available for and didn't value my friendship and/or left off for years at a time. Who knows why? Most gents in my experience don't prefer anything long distance and most gents from early to mid-20s don't prefer friendships with women.

Most gents above the "age of innocence" (say university age) are looking primarily to women as a potential nearby sexual partner, whom they may or may not care about or love. Often commitment and certainly love are absent by their choice, as truly loving someone day-in and day-out takes time. This would mean time spent getting to know them and love them first and foremost as people and as friends.

I'm not saying you are not soul family and/or don't have past-life experiences. Both of those may well be true and you would be the one to reflect and evaluate that.

But I'm also here to say that all but the most spiritually and emotionally attuned gents will readily disregard soul resonance, authentic love, and even the queen of Sheba herself if they have someone readily available at hand who fits the bill and is sexually available.

Unfortunately, even if you were just interested in friendship and appreciating a connection, many men cease viewing women as lifelong serious friends and begin more exclusively evaluating time spent based on sexual availability. I know you are young yet. But he may already been in the groove of pursuing sexual relationships and out of the groove of pursuing friendship.

Likewise, if you were say 5 or 10 years older and you were at hand...and even if you were interested in him as both a friend and partner...

....still, unless he was open to the love in his heart and to committing to you in a relationship, he still wouldn't necessarily be good for you. Even though your authentic love for one another is true. This is the reality of where humanity is at, as a species. Currently, the way most men in modern society have been schooled and oriented to view women upon adulthood tends to severely limit the development and presence of authentic love.

If you have a soul bond, the love will be there regardless. But many today 1) have been schooled to disregard feelings, sadly...2) will not know how to interpret it if he is not having sex with you or planning to do so...and 3) anyway may tend to dismiss it or downplay feelings, so that casual sexual relationships can be pursued instead (with either you or with others), which do not have any deeper engagement of feelings...again, authentic feelings and real engagement can be terrifying when you have not been allowed permission by society to feel your feelings. And when you have been schooled to look at women as outlets for your sexual use and convenience.

It's predatory, it's extremely addictive behavior for men (porn and casual sex), it's misaligned with authentic love, and as we all know our society as a whole is only just beginning to deal with the fallout from the last half-century of society's promotion and encouragement of this paradigm of masculinity. I'm really pleased to see that many other gents have begun to see through the hollow paradigm and they're not proud of much of what they've done in the past, thinking at the time "everyone was doing it." We have several lost generations, including my folks, mine, and yours too, though I hope the tide is turning soon.

You are young yet and so you want to be sure you care for yourself equally to the other Unless you are next door or just round the way, many gents will not pursue you sexually and unless they are spiritually and emotionally evolved, many gents will not engage at length socially with any non-family member who is not sexually available to them.

So I would recommend finding places where you can engage with and get to know others as people and as friends...as a practice for a lifetime. Most gents in our mainstream modern culture won't be interested. But who cares? Those that care for you for who you are will be willing to take time to get to know you better, first and foremost as a person and as a beloved friend.

Peace & blessings
7L
__________________
Bound by conventions, people tend to reach for what is easy.

Here we must be unafraid of what is difficult.

For all living beings in nature must unfold in their particular way

and become themselves despite all opposition.

-- Rainer Maria Rilke
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  #6  
Old 09-03-2018, 02:59 AM
ValVan ValVan is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 72
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 7luminaries
Valvan, hello there...
My 2 p's....

Unless that person is very close soul fam, there is absolutely no way I would tolerate or even feel spiritually inclined toward someone who wasn't available for and didn't value my friendship and/or left off for years at a time. Who knows why? Most gents in my experience don't prefer anything long distance and most gents from early to mid-20s don't prefer friendships with women.

Most gents above the "age of innocence" (say university age) are looking primarily to women as a potential nearby sexual partner, whom they may or may not care about or love. Often commitment and certainly love are absent by their choice, as truly loving someone day-in and day-out takes time. This would mean time spent getting to know them and love them first and foremost as people and as friends.

I'm not saying you are not soul family and/or don't have past-life experiences. Both of those may well be true and you would be the one to reflect and evaluate that.

But I'm also here to say that all but the most spiritually and emotionally attuned gents will readily disregard soul resonance, authentic love, and even the queen of Sheba herself if they have someone readily available at hand who fits the bill and is sexually available.

Unfortunately, even if you were just interested in friendship and appreciating a connection, many men cease viewing women as lifelong serious friends and begin more exclusively evaluating time spent based on sexual availability. I know you are young yet. But he may already been in the groove of pursuing sexual relationships and out of the groove of pursuing friendship.

Likewise, if you were say 5 or 10 years older and you were at hand...and even if you were interested in him as both a friend and partner...

....still, unless he was open to the love in his heart and to committing to you in a relationship, he still wouldn't necessarily be good for you. Even though your authentic love for one another is true. This is the reality of where humanity is at, as a species. Currently, the way most men in modern society have been schooled and oriented to view women upon adulthood tends to severely limit the development and presence of authentic love.

If you have a soul bond, the love will be there regardless. But many today 1) have been schooled to disregard feelings, sadly...2) will not know how to interpret it if he is not having sex with you or planning to do so...and 3) anyway may tend to dismiss it or downplay feelings, so that casual sexual relationships can be pursued instead (with either you or with others), which do not have any deeper engagement of feelings...again, authentic feelings and real engagement can be terrifying when you have not been allowed permission by society to feel your feelings. And when you have been schooled to look at women as outlets for your sexual use and convenience.

It's predatory, it's extremely addictive behavior for men (porn and casual sex), it's misaligned with authentic love, and as we all know our society as a whole is only just beginning to deal with the fallout from the last half-century of society's promotion and encouragement of this paradigm of masculinity. I'm really pleased to see that many other gents have begun to see through the hollow paradigm and they're not proud of much of what they've done in the past, thinking at the time "everyone was doing it." We have several lost generations, including my folks, mine, and yours too, though I hope the tide is turning soon.

You are young yet and so you want to be sure you care for yourself equally to the other Unless you are next door or just round the way, many gents will not pursue you sexually and unless they are spiritually and emotionally evolved, many gents will not engage at length socially with any non-family member who is not sexually available to them.

So I would recommend finding places where you can engage with and get to know others as people and as friends...as a practice for a lifetime. Most gents in our mainstream modern culture won't be interested. But who cares? Those that care for you for who you are will be willing to take time to get to know you better, first and foremost as a person and as a beloved friend.

Peace & blessings
7L

Thank you:)
What you say makes sense :)
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  #7  
Old 09-03-2018, 04:41 PM
7luminaries 7luminaries is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,221
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You're very welcome...so glad it made sense to you. And much love & light to you

Peace & blessings
7L
__________________
Bound by conventions, people tend to reach for what is easy.

Here we must be unafraid of what is difficult.

For all living beings in nature must unfold in their particular way

and become themselves despite all opposition.

-- Rainer Maria Rilke
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  #8  
Old 11-03-2018, 08:49 PM
Melahin Melahin is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 1,356
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ValVan
but there's much karma !?

There never is karma (it is an idea that was invented by a donkey), only the hole one might dig oneself into. You did not feel good about yourself, so facing someone you might love you were faced with what if he did not love you back? In such sometimes it is easier to crawl into that hole than to face yourself, and what this life has given you so far. You are a perfect beautiful being, that is all I truly want to add to this
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I am the flower, the tree, the vine. I am the path
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  #9  
Old 29-04-2018, 09:50 AM
sea-dove sea-dove is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,242
 
Hi, old post but i want to respond to it as there is a good chance you still have not let this go guy (it isnt necessarily something you can help as far as holding on goes when it comes to past life issues).

Firstly I do want to say your age does play some revelence here and hence why others brought this up. Ones first love, one I dont think ever forgets it. Its very strong with teens. Its like ones first sexual experience, you'll never forget it.

Teen girls often develop love obsessions or may hold onto the same one. For me I was completely obsessed with a guy older then me from the ages of 13 right throu to when I was 16 years old. I loved him sooo much!!! I wanted to have his children and marry him and I still emotionally hurt some to this day over something he did. Note I do not think any of this was past life stuff but rather I just admired things about this guy and fell in love. I was a teen and he was my first love.

So anyway Im considering that when i read your post. With this all being said, I do wonder if you do have a past life with this guy esp if you are still thinking of him with him impacting you this strong if you've gone on and had other love relationships since. Have you done so?

Im currently a bit of a mess myself as I just have come across another one of my soul mates. I know its past life emotions as I dont know this guy in this lifetime so dont even know the things about him this lifetime to even admire or to like.. but the emotions are there all so strongly. Im missing a guy who I dont at all know this lifetime, Ive never even seen him or know what he looks like, just someone I spoke to online for a short time and yes it is like some of what you described.

I cant stop thinking about him or are easily triggered into thinking about him and when I do Im overwhelmed with feeling. For myself its a deep longing to be with the guy. I spent some time today, crying for this guy I dont even know. I also feel like Ive known him forever thou I dont know him this lifetime.

The thing with past life stuff is trying not to think about it will not help to clear it.. better to work throu how you feel. I myself find i clear things better if I can communicate with the other etc and over time I can adapt to how things are now and loose the pain I feel. So Im right now trying to get back in contact with this guy who is probably avoiding me. Hopefully I can be friends with him which will bring up all this past life stuff faster and let me work throu it quicker. For me I tend to get hit with all the past life emotions first and then later will gain understanding of them which then in my case I find it greatly helps me.

lol past life stuff isnt easy.
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  #10  
Old 29-04-2018, 09:50 AM
sea-dove sea-dove is offline
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Posts: 1,242
 
it double posted
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