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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Soulmates & Twin Flames

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  #1  
Old 16-11-2017, 01:03 AM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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It is over. This hurts soooo bad...

Was told this afternoon our relationship is over. I've sensed for 2 months something was up, but didn't know what. Suddenly he didn't get in touch every day anymore, I panicked completely. Only just got out of that, found more solid ground, standing on my own feet more and more. Now I was told it's over. He's met someone else, and wasn't sure until recently what to do because he does love me a lot. He is crazy about me, but he isn't in love with me. Then they say women are weird? To me being crazy about someone IS being in love. So I don't get it. I really don't get it. I'll deal with it, I have no choice. But I don't get it, which doesn't help. If you can at least understand why it doesn't work, makes it easier to come to terms with.
This hurts like hell. In a weird way it's a relief that I don't have to stress and worry anymore. But the pain is incredible. The bond is still there, from his side too. But clearly that wasn't enough.
What I have learnt from this: female intuition is always right --> In retrospect I know which evening he met this woman. He'd gone out, I asked him about it later, if it had been fun etc. and the way he avoided it... I remember thinking "Oh god, I hope he hasn't been dating another woman???"
Now, in retrospect, I'm certain he met her that night. AFter I'd thought that, I told myself not to be stupid, he wouldn't do that and so on. And no, maybe he didn't date her, but he met her.
There have been a few more pointers over the last two months where my intuition got triggered. I kept telling myself I was just reacting out of fear again, as I tend to do so easily, that I should trust him and so on and so forth.
Yet, intuition simply does not lie...
Talked to a friend, that's what us girls do, lol, she's paranormal and talked to her before about him and me, esp when I was panicking again. She's one of the ppl who confirmed we are TFs. She got that directly from my deceased dad, and gave me a number of details / messages from my dad that no one but me and my dad would know. Which proved to me the messages indeed came from my dad.
Oh well... I'll have to get over it, but I fear it's going to take time. And the fact he has someone else is what hurts the most. Knowing he likely won't even miss me but is happy with her, freaking wonderful. Yes I want him to be happy, but right now it's a bit much to bear. I'm only human, and TF or no, knowing he's simply going to forget about me because he's happily in love with another hurts. Bad.
He said it wasn't going to be all that easy for him, but I doubt that. I doubt someone is going to be miserable when they're with someone they're in love with. Then they're going to be joyful and happy. And will share all the stuff we used to share, even as short as 2 weeks ago. Sorry if I can't feel happy about that. It just hurts.
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  #2  
Old 16-11-2017, 01:39 AM
gemma gemma is offline
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So sorry you are going through this...wish I could offer advice. Sometimes love stinks.

For what its worth, you are my favorite person on this site, so you got me sister..
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  #3  
Old 16-11-2017, 01:46 AM
Trinitydown Trinitydown is offline
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Location: North Dakota
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TFs will never fully leave each other’s memories. The bonds are just that powerful.

I lost mine early on before we ever really got to meet. I still think about him from time to time and I barely even knew him. So don’t be hard on yourself. Grieve for however long you feel you need to. Time will be your friend.

Feel special that you were a lucky person who got to meet her tf. Not everyone gets to.
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On a clear day, I can see. See a very long way.
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  #4  
Old 16-11-2017, 01:53 AM
Paige Ignited Paige Ignited is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 229
 
OMG FairyCrystal! I really feel for you right now.
And strangely, this is why.

First I'd like to say, Your story with your Twin Flame, AND your posts in general of your life experiences have resonated with me very deeply over the time I've been reading and following your posts, and they've touched me to no end thus far.

You truly have been an inspiration to me!

But, I was just saying to someone the other day, because I had a 'feeling', that was a strong emotional feeling and I couldn't place where or what it quite was. It actually had me thrown for a loop not like others have thrown me, because this feeling was something so different and out of the ordinary.

But...I felt something terrible was going to happen. (perhaps a link between Twin Flamers?)

Anyway, upon reading your post just now. I had a smack in the solar plexus as I read, the exact feeling I was having the other day. It's a particular feeling. A very not nice feeling.

Strange because, at the time of this feeling for the first time, a few days ago, I was reading one of your posts, and thinking of my own Twin Flame while doing so.

Today, now that you have just posted this, I believe I may have been feeling you! (and maybe my Twin)
And perhaps a chain reaction may be in store with my own Twin Flame.

Maybe I'm wrong. But my intuition has always been strong. Just sometimes I don't understand it all the time, right away.

I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened, and I wish you well in this next stage, that your now going to embark on.

Hugs to you!! and love!

Your a strong woman!
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  #5  
Old 16-11-2017, 02:04 AM
ssdm1 ssdm1 is offline
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Posts: 660
 
I can hardly believe this FairyCrystal, and yet I can from my own experience. Unfortunately I do know how you are feeling and the horrible pain this causes because I was just where you are two months ago. I felt like everything was gone, no hope at all, the not being able to see him or talk to him was unbearable. But my twin understood what I was feeling and wants to remain in touch and so now we enter a weird relationship. He called me for the first time this week and I was so relieved that he was thinking of me, wanted to talk, and still wants to get together - I needed that from him.

From my experience with my twin I see that our twins cannot handle the intense feelings they do have for us (they won't admit that to themselves). These other women they choose to be with are easier for them, the connection not as deep, the feelings more on the surface, they don't get triggered to face the deep stuff within them. I know my twin loves me and has for 30 years, but he consistently chooses to be with women who are easier for him to deal with. Women who are meek, go along with whatever he wants, and do not question him. With me our bond is deep, the feelings intense. I trigger deep things from childhood in him and he strongly resists facing these things. With other women he can just enjoy a woman's company without all this other stuff. Yet he wants to maintain our contact and friendship and so we have a weird relationship.

If he is your twin he will not be able to separate from you completely. Give this time, no matter how hopeless it seems. I'd bet he'll be back in touch with you after awhile.

Please feel free to talk with me anytime.
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  #6  
Old 16-11-2017, 02:06 AM
Clover Clover is offline
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Location: Pacific Coast
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Sorry, FC, my heart dropped reading this. Your threads were always so positive and encouraging to those in the journey. I don't have the right words to say right now ( ssdm1 has summarized it very well if I could articulate it)

I know you did the best you could ( and for all the members here) this too shall pass, Keep your head up
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  #7  
Old 16-11-2017, 02:26 AM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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Thank you all. And yes, it is quite the blow, even though I felt something was off since beginning September, still a serious blow. I love the man like I've never loved another. And I know ppl always say that, but in this case it is true. In a very odd way. In a way it was as if we skipped the normal pink clouds & butterflies stage, we went from 0 to 100 on the first date. Yes, we were in love, but in a different way from anything I've ever experienced before.
Yes, I am still positive about the TF thing, and I'm still quite certain he is my TF. I have been in the illusion thing with my ex, that was totally different. I knew deep down it wasn't true, that I merely wanted it to be true.
Still, TF or no, it just hurts like hell. At the same time it's a slight relief as the stress about what's going on has gone now. But the love remains, cos I do love him deeply.

SSDM I agree with what you say, that they tend to go for women who don't trigger them so much. I've been fearing on and off as I know this can happen. And I've also known from quite early on that he got hurt real bad by his ex wife and never really totally got over that pain. He had quite a lot of relationships after that, which I always consider to be a red flag, and I always tended to avoid such men. Too risky, an indication they have problems with committing.
But since it was so intense right on the first date, both sides, not just me, I decided to go for it regardless.
Now I gotta pay the price... Personally I think -and this is guessing, I don't know for sure- he gets out of relationships when a true commitment is 'required' because he never got over that old pain.
Would make sense, as I think things started to go downhill for us when he felt he was in over his head. A year ago he said he didn't doubt at all, was certain. So somewhere somehow something must've changed. I just don't know what, other than I am quite sure he has commitment problems.
I think he basically hops from one relationship into the next. When I met him he was only out of one for 2 months but I never noticed him not being over that. And now, after 16 months with me, he hops straight into another one at the point he has to consider committing and moving in together.

Not that any of that helps me. I still have to deal with this pain and losing the man I love.
And what I don't get are the messages my friend got via my dad. One of which was to be patient and to trust. Trust in what, I wonder. It's over. Done.
Sigh.
Time for bed, it's 3.30 AM. I suppose I can sleep, lol. If I can't sleep now -I'm shattered- I will never sleep again. I just hope my brain won't kick in too much once I'm in bed. I think tomorrow night will be better, but this first night... kind of weird, it almost feels as if we've been living together and I now have to spend my first night alone. You know, that first time alone in bed again where you used to sleep together.
Yet we saw each other once every month approx. so how can it feel this way?
Please send me your love and light so I can sleep! Lord knows I need it!

THank you, you're all really sweet! xxx
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  #8  
Old 16-11-2017, 03:15 AM
unicorn68 unicorn68 is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 564
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by FairyCrystal
Thank you all. And yes, it is quite the blow, even though I felt something was off since beginning September, still a serious blow. I love the man like I've never loved another. And I know ppl always say that, but in this case it is true. In a very odd way. In a way it was as if we skipped the normal pink clouds & butterflies stage, we went from 0 to 100 on the first date. Yes, we were in love, but in a different way from anything I've ever experienced before.
Yes, I am still positive about the TF thing, and I'm still quite certain he is my TF. I have been in the illusion thing with my ex, that was totally different. I knew deep down it wasn't true, that I merely wanted it to be true.
Still, TF or no, it just hurts like hell. At the same time it's a slight relief as the stress about what's going on has gone now. But the love remains, cos I do love him deeply.

SSDM I agree with what you say, that they tend to go for women who don't trigger them so much. I've been fearing on and off as I know this can happen. And I've also known from quite early on that he got hurt real bad by his ex wife and never really totally got over that pain. He had quite a lot of relationships after that, which I always consider to be a red flag, and I always tended to avoid such men. Too risky, an indication they have problems with committing.
But since it was so intense right on the first date, both sides, not just me, I decided to go for it regardless.
Now I gotta pay the price... Personally I think -and this is guessing, I don't know for sure- he gets out of relationships when a true commitment is 'required' because he never got over that old pain.
Would make sense, as I think things started to go downhill for us when he felt he was in over his head. A year ago he said he didn't doubt at all, was certain. So somewhere somehow something must've changed. I just don't know what, other than I am quite sure he has commitment problems.
I think he basically hops from one relationship into the next. When I met him he was only out of one for 2 months but I never noticed him not being over that. And now, after 16 months with me, he hops straight into another one at the point he has to consider committing and moving in together.

Not that any of that helps me. I still have to deal with this pain and losing the man I love.
And what I don't get are the messages my friend got via my dad. One of which was to be patient and to trust. Trust in what, I wonder. It's over. Done.
Sigh.
Time for bed, it's 3.30 AM. I suppose I can sleep, lol. If I can't sleep now -I'm shattered- I will never sleep again. I just hope my brain won't kick in too much once I'm in bed. I think tomorrow night will be better, but this first night... kind of weird, it almost feels as if we've been living together and I now have to spend my first night alone. You know, that first time alone in bed again where you used to sleep together.
Yet we saw each other once every month approx. so how can it feel this way?
Please send me your love and light so I can sleep! Lord knows I need it!

THank you, you're all really sweet! xxx
its entirely possible that you havent even bumped into your twin flame as yet.my heart feels your pain.but ask yourself this.if you are complete within yourself then why are you feeling this pain?i know this sounds harsh but its also truth....you dont actually NEED anyone....ive been thinking on this for like 2 hours by the way,i know how delicate you are....
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  #9  
Old 16-11-2017, 07:06 AM
psychegrl psychegrl is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Seattle, WA
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Oh FairyCrystal! 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

I'm so sorry to hear this! You are such a ray of hope and grace in this place and there is so much joy you bring here. It's not fair! 😡

I'm sure there is some rational explication but this is just sh!tty! Even with all the love you've experienced, lessons learned, and the clearing this is awful! He hurt you and it su.cks.

I remember the huge surge of grief and inability to breath on and off for months. I know you don't need any advice or random ideas of how this is really a good thing so I'll just say I'm sorry and I, too, am here for you if you need an ear to talk to. You have certainly been there for me.

So much love to you. Try to remember that you are a beautiful soul and there are people who can see your light, even over the Internet. ♡♡♡
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  #10  
Old 16-11-2017, 07:09 AM
psychegrl psychegrl is offline
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Location: Seattle, WA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by unicorn68
its entirely possible that you havent even bumped into your twin flame as yet.my heart feels your pain.but ask yourself this.if you are complete within yourself then why are you feeling this pain?i know this sounds harsh but its also truth....you dont actually NEED anyone....ive been thinking on this for like 2 hours by the way,i know how delicate you are....


Wow... this is the worst reply I've seen you make yet. It's offensive, presumptuous, and in no way helpful for anyone. You don't know much about women or unconditional love, do you?
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