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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Soulmates & Twin Flames

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  #1  
Old 03-10-2017, 03:52 PM
Windbreeze Windbreeze is offline
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 90
 
Question Do We Really Need Significant Other to Feel Happy and Purposeful?

Hello,

I noticed that when I was in a great mood (high vibrational state) and doing what I love, felt the purpose, I was not dependent on anything outside. I didn't need approval from others and didn't need significant other (I don't have one)

However things changed, I can no longer sustain doing what I love, I feel like I lost the purpose. Interestingly I started feeling the need of outside things that I mentioned above and need for significant other. Things that I could do well without. I think that being in a highly vibrational state and in a state of creation eliminates the need for those outside things.

Am I right? Maybe this is not same for everyone but I am sure some great poets, musicians, scientists etc. we so consumed by their work that they did not need anything else.

Also, there's a guy named Kyle Cease (you can find him on YouTube) who combined humour with self-improvement. He says that by feeling the need for significant other, we feel complete as a whole but we actually are already complete without significant other and once we do what we are supposed to here we will attract that significant other in our life.

What do you think? Does that make sense regarding my point about great artists, scientists etc. above?

Thanks.
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  #2  
Old 03-10-2017, 04:35 PM
Lorelyen Lorelyen is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,125
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TechnicGeek
Hello,

I noticed that when I was in a great mood (high vibrational state) and doing what I love, felt the purpose, I was not dependent on anything outside. I didn't need approval from others and didn't need significant other (I don't have one)

However things changed, I can no longer sustain doing what I love, I feel like I lost the purpose. Interestingly I started feeling the need of outside things that I mentioned above and need for significant other. Things that I could do well without. I think that being in a highly vibrational state and in a state of creation eliminates the need for those outside things.
Agreed.

Quote:
Am I right? Maybe this is not same for everyone but I am sure some great poets, musicians, scientists etc. we so consumed by their work that they did not need anything else.
Also agreed. Well, they may not have wanted anyone else but needed the devotees to look after, sometimes finance, them - and it's always nice to have someone around to make the coffee. Not all of course but some had strange relationships e.g. Dali with Gala. Richard and Cosima Wagner.

Quote:
Also, there's a guy named Kyle Cease (you can find him on YouTube) who combined humour with self-improvement. He says that by feeling the need for significant other, we feel complete as a whole but we actually are already complete without significant other and once we do what we are supposed to here we will attract that significant other in our life.
Absolutely. That's how we arrived and we had to grow. I suspect he's falling back on the idea of family unit. Surely a family gives decent parents a deep sense of sharing, a responsibility and a (natural) purpose. There's a lot of stuff on youtube. People have the choice of believing it or not.
As I see it.

Quote:
What do you think? Does that make sense regarding my point about great artists, scientists etc. above?

Thanks.
Yes. Significant in a soul sense probably no in most cases, in a domestic sense, maybe. The category you mention are notoriously single-minded and obsessive about their work to the exclusion of significant others because they aren't able to share much, their emotions, visions, creative struggles - they can pretend but most goes into their work. I mean, for Pete's sake some can't even look after themselves re food and domestic basics! Most it has to be said are men! A list would be very long.
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  #3  
Old 03-10-2017, 04:44 PM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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Well, you pretty much summed it up yourself. When you are on a high vibration you aren't needy nor dependent on outside factors to make you feel good. you got inner strength to support you.
As soon as your vibration lowers you tend to lose that. You get more insecure, needy and dependent on others / outside sources to validate and support you.
The way out is to get your vibration up again. In order to do that, you'll need to find out why it dropped to begin with. What happened? Did someone say anything that got you off-kilter? And so on.
What can also help greatly is to not resist things if you've lost your drive and passion for things right now. Going with the flow will get you back on track at some point.
But if something did happen to cause this, it can be good to have a closer look at that and deal with it.

As for a significant other.... if you don't need one because you're feeling great, you will attract someone who's also feeling great. Then you can become wonderful co-creators from both your unique selves. That's a healthy relationship, interdependent (which few have btw because most still have too many issues to work out).

If you need someone you will attract a partner who will be needy too OR have commitment issues or some other issue, and you will bang around together because neither is really at the vibration they should be at. Then you get together to learn and grow and work through your issues so you can be ready for a healthy relationship at some point.
Many don't do this and spend their entire life in such a relationship.
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  #4  
Old 03-10-2017, 04:58 PM
olhosdeamendoa olhosdeamendoa is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 159
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TechnicGeek
Hello,

I noticed that when I was in a great mood (high vibrational state) and doing what I love, felt the purpose, I was not dependent on anything outside. I didn't need approval from others and didn't need significant other (I don't have one)

However things changed, I can no longer sustain doing what I love, I feel like I lost the purpose. Interestingly I started feeling the need of outside things that I mentioned above and need for significant other. Things that I could do well without. I think that being in a highly vibrational state and in a state of creation eliminates the need for those outside things.

Am I right? Maybe this is not same for everyone but I am sure some great poets, musicians, scientists etc. we so consumed by their work that they did not need anything else.

Also, there's a guy named Kyle Cease (you can find him on YouTube) who combined humour with self-improvement. He says that by feeling the need for significant other, we feel complete as a whole but we actually are already complete without significant other and once we do what we are supposed to here we will attract that significant other in our life.

What do you think? Does that make sense regarding my point about great artists, scientists etc. above?

Thanks.

I think you need to find a balance between "being consumed by the things you love" and holding space in your life to be with someone else.

It is normal to want to have a significant other and outside things, after all we live in a physical world and through our relationship with others is how we grow and learn.

What is not normal is being totally consumed by doing "what you love" or the other opposite, totally dependant on external things to feel good.

Finding the balance is key.
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  #5  
Old 03-10-2017, 05:04 PM
Windbreeze Windbreeze is offline
Pathfinder
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 90
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
Absolutely. That's how we arrived and we had to grow. I suspect he's falling back on the idea of family unit. Surely a family gives decent parents a deep sense of sharing, a responsibility and a (natural) purpose.

Natural purpose as to create "vessels" for new waves of souls for generations to continue?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
I mean, for Pete's sake some can't even look after themselves re food and domestic basics! Most it has to be said are men! A list would be very long.

Ever heard saying that the path to man's heart lies through his stomach? I heard that some single men having no significant other neglect themselves when it comes to diet and become unhealthy since they lack basics of food preparation and don't lead healthy diet...

Quote:
Originally Posted by FairyCrystal
As for a significant other.... if you don't need one because you're feeling great, you will attract someone who's also feeling great. Then you can become wonderful co-creators from both your unique selves. That's a healthy relationship, interdependent (which few have btw because most still have too many issues to work out).

And can person who's feeling great attract the opposite to feed on it? Can independent, self-relaint, self-sufficient person (positive) attract the opposite (negative)? Or that person won't let anyone negative into their "circle"?
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  #6  
Old 03-10-2017, 05:10 PM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TechnicGeek
Natural purpose as to create "vessels" for new waves of souls for generations to continue?



Ever heard saying that the path to man's heart lies through his stomach? I heard that some single men having no significant other neglect themselves when it comes to diet and become unhealthy since they lack basics of food preparation and don't lead healthy diet...



And can person who's feeling great attract the opposite to feed on it? Can independent, self-relaint, self-sufficient person (positive) attract the opposite (negative)? Or that person won't let anyone negative into their "circle"?
If they truly have a high vibration they wouldn't feel attracted to such a person. The vibrational gap is too great.
If this does happen, you weren't really all that solid in your high vibration at all (yet) and you will go down in vibration yourself. It is not possible for one to be truly high and the other to be low. Then either one has to go up or the other will go down. And you will only go down if your own higher vibration has wobbles in it still.
But typically there simply won't be any attraction. The low party will get irritated by the higher party's joy and positiveness, and vice versa.
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  #7  
Old 03-10-2017, 11:34 PM
Inika Inika is offline
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Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 1,385
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you dont need anyone or anything outside of your own awesome self to have purpose and meaning and to be and feel happy, whole, complete, (fill in other stuff that elates you into the heavens of epic awesomeness)

What we like is to share with others and if we truly care and love others, we willingly want to hear about them, genuinely listen and be there.
its not an absolute need in order to be happy. Wanting to share happy, joy, love is something else entirely.

To become dependent on the need for others to bring you happiness is like saying you've no happy in you to feel nor give, you need it from others to be able to give it.

you can do fine on your own. but when your world is now defined by someone else's ability to emerge feelings within you of happy or sad then it becomes a loss of your own mastery of your own self.meaning, your joy is easily gone as it is given because it's not your own. You've no mastery over yourself and all outside of you masters over you because it majorly effects you, dents you and controls you.

if you're not solid within, you'll crumble under anyones hands. because your happiness is in their hand along with your heart.
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  #8  
Old 04-10-2017, 02:57 AM
BlueCat BlueCat is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 1,011
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Of course not, we don't NEED anyone to depend upon our happiness. I see too many times (also TFs) going into the co-dependence route, being happy only because they are in a relationship and if not they are miserable. Our society make us learn this damaging concept, for this we see many times abusive or dysnfunctional relationships that would be ended a long time ago if both parties wouldn't depend of it. Also, being "love addicted" make you suffer, stressful and your vibration drops low low especially if you are really insecure about the other or you are with someone else just to not be "alone".
Most won't believe me and see me as a fool, but there is nothing better to not rely to someone else for your own happiness and do your own business being it art, science, etc or hobbies, not having unwanted duties (ex. being forced or manipulated to have kids instead of having them in a healthy and consensual manner or being with a partner because your family want this, etc...) and people that drain your emotional force due to their negativity. When you are of higher vibration, you want to find people similar to you, like mature/older souls resonate better to each other when you find them, usually mature/older souls are into the arts, music, science for a important purpose not just to be famous and popular and most of them don't need anyone because they are so into their favourite field or find someone that match them better without rely on them. Unfortunately some of them are too much into it that forget about having a SO or even friends, family and shut in that space instead to create space for them while not losing self independence, hobbies, tastes and personality.
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  #9  
Old 04-10-2017, 01:59 PM
ssdm1 ssdm1 is offline
Guide
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 526
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inika
you dont need anyone or anything outside of your own awesome self to have purpose and meaning and to be and feel happy, whole, complete, (fill in other stuff that elates you into the heavens of epic awesomeness)

What we like is to share with others and if we truly care and love others, we willingly want to hear about them, genuinely listen and be there.
its not an absolute need in order to be happy. Wanting to share happy, joy, love is something else entirely.

To become dependent on the need for others to bring you happiness is like saying you've no happy in you to feel nor give, you need it from others to be able to give it.

you can do fine on your own. but when your world is now defined by someone else's ability to emerge feelings within you of happy or sad then it becomes a loss of your own mastery of your own self.meaning, your joy is easily gone as it is given because it's not your own. You've no mastery over yourself and all outside of you masters over you because it majorly effects you, dents you and controls you.

if you're not solid within, you'll crumble under anyones hands. because your happiness is in their hand along with your heart.

I love this! So very true.
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  #10  
Old 04-10-2017, 11:21 PM
Nature Grows Nature Grows is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Australia, being a park ranger amongst kangaroos, plants & trees, the ocean and all that!
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Last edited by Nature Grows : 05-10-2017 at 01:13 AM.
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