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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Love & Relationships -Friends and Family

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  #1  
Old 17-08-2017, 11:56 PM
dream jo dream jo is online now
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Location: sea dream u cud say
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no 1 gets me

all i o no 1 gets me
all i sea is bad in me
all isea is all rotenes in me
i did try 2 sea bst in me bt i cnt sea ot
others say thy ca bt i cnt
ovr yrs iv bean braded
scum
*****
evi;
vile
rotnes
rotinses
scum
a eprsn it shid uf bean brn in brth in 2 rottn i wud nt burn wish i agrea
its my flt d falt i cased a stroke on s 1 tes bt i do feal bad mor bad thn her kids do
just 1 thng im plsd im not 2 baln balm for bt it wull blam be for belgn world disters ill soon be 2 bal for usky im 2 bal for evrys 1 s lif its why 1 of reson i dnt luv my slf coz im balsm fore vry1 sprobls its goin on
sorry bt int min my heds akl ovr it is
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dream jo
  #2  
Old 18-08-2017, 05:34 AM
shivatar shivatar is offline
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Location: Olympia, Washington
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dream jo
all i o no 1 gets me
all i sea is bad in me
all isea is all rotenes in me
i did try 2 sea bst in me bt i cnt sea ot
others say thy ca bt i cnt
ovr yrs iv bean braded
scum
*****
evi;
vile
rotnes
rotinses
scum
a eprsn it shid uf bean brn in brth in 2 rottn i wud nt burn wish i agrea
its my flt d falt i cased a stroke on s 1 tes bt i do feal bad mor bad thn her kids do
just 1 thng im plsd im not 2 baln balm for bt it wull blam be for belgn world disters ill soon be 2 bal for usky im 2 bal for evrys 1 s lif its why 1 of reson i dnt luv my slf coz im balsm fore vry1 sprobls its goin on
sorry bt int min my heds akl ovr it is


I'm sorry you are going through such pain.

I wish you the best.

Hello.
Goodbye.
Love.
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Honest
  #3  
Old 18-08-2017, 11:37 PM
FallingLeaves FallingLeaves is online now
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i found, much to my own consternation, that at some point thinking badly of myself became the best medicine I could have had at the time. It was a hard pill to swallow though.

  #4  
Old 18-08-2017, 11:48 PM
dream jo dream jo is online now
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thnx i feal bad abot mom lot of stuf sum1 i carsd ast stroke on yrs go all glt nw is beatin e up in sid
evn her sons wz mad it me coz i dnt get her meds 2 her strate way coz thy cud not be bothd it carsd her stroke no 1 can feal bads i do vor it coz evry stro shes had aft 2nd 1s carsd thru me cz dr tld her sons it wz carzd thru ths i no if thers is a hell i will rot for it
moms dem;/azz if id tk betr car of her ths 1s beatin me up ins di 2 coz iv bean tld be prebead for pele layin in 2 me abot why dnt i tak betr car of her u no u not imprtj nver will be i laredy no ths
bt few hav sead try 2 sat 2 1s it lay in 2 me wear wear thy wen i wz draned or getn robd or cond bt thn u get othr s tel me im scum of erth wish maks me feal evn mor bad abot my slf
i no i need confsed in my slf in min wish im goin thu a bad 1
i wish i cud of tk betr car of mom i relay do shes nevr goin 2 get betr
thn i get ltd i can hav lif an tim i can hav lif lar on wen im oldr wen im 0s 60s coz im olbyb 42 soon 2 be 43
i no i ned 2 sort my hed ort try 2 belve thers a tiny bti fog ud in me evn hrf insj of it
sorry if im sayin wong thngs
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dream jo
  #5  
Old 20-08-2017, 03:14 AM
shivatar shivatar is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dream jo
thnx i feal bad abot mom lot of stuf sum1 i carsd ast stroke on yrs go all glt nw is beatin e up in sid
evn her sons wz mad it me coz i dnt get her meds 2 her strate way coz thy cud not be bothd it carsd her stroke no 1 can feal bads i do vor it coz evry stro shes had aft 2nd 1s carsd thru me cz dr tld her sons it wz carzd thru ths i no if thers is a hell i will rot for it
moms dem;/azz if id tk betr car of her ths 1s beatin me up ins di 2 coz iv bean tld be prebead for pele layin in 2 me abot why dnt i tak betr car of her u no u not imprtj nver will be i laredy no ths
bt few hav sead try 2 sat 2 1s it lay in 2 me wear wear thy wen i wz draned or getn robd or cond bt thn u get othr s tel me im scum of erth wish maks me feal evn mor bad abot my slf
i no i need confsed in my slf in min wish im goin thu a bad 1
i wish i cud of tk betr car of mom i relay do shes nevr goin 2 get betr
thn i get ltd i can hav lif an tim i can hav lif lar on wen im oldr wen im 0s 60s coz im olbyb 42 soon 2 be 43
i no i ned 2 sort my hed ort try 2 belve thers a tiny bti fog ud in me evn hrf insj of it
sorry if im sayin wong thngs

It sounds like you have had a very tough life. Seems like people take you for granted, and instead of helping you realize all the goodness and potential you have inside you they are intent on keeping you down.

I'm sending you some of my strength now. That, and these words, are all I have to offer you now. I wish I had more. Sorry about that.
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Honest
  #6  
Old 20-08-2017, 02:02 PM
dream jo dream jo is online now
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thnx .................................
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  #7  
Old 21-08-2017, 04:58 PM
dream jo dream jo is online now
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i thng iv let 2017 get 2 me coz iv had a bad run ths yr
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  #8  
Old 06-10-2017, 01:34 AM
taurmel taurmel is offline
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It's been a year of bad energies trying to overpower the good, that's for sure. I do hope you're feeling better, my friend It does sound like everyone's expectations for your perfection has caused you to get down on yourself for not "doing everything right".

Sometimes you need to beat all this bad stuff out of yourself, bring it to the surface so you can heal it. You are doing the best you can! You are doing everything you can to help those around you, and that makes you an amazing person. It sounds like the sons were also projecting their feelings of guilt on you for them not taking better care of their mom themselves. You did what you could to help!!

How are you feeling now? Sending you extra love & light to brighten your day.
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"Live all of your life. Understand it, see it, appreciate it. And have fun." - Joss Whedon
  #9  
Old 06-10-2017, 04:28 PM
dream jo dream jo is online now
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hi

Quote:
Originally Posted by taurmel
It's been a year of bad energies trying to overpower the good, that's for sure. I do hope you're feeling better, my friend It does sound like everyone's expectations for your perfection has caused you to get down on yourself for not "doing everything right".

Sometimes you need to beat all this bad stuff out of yourself, bring it to the surface so you can heal it. You are doing the best you can! You are doing everything you can to help those around you, and that makes you an amazing person. It sounds like the sons were also projecting their feelings of guilt on you for them not taking better care of their mom themselves. You did what you could to help!!

How are you feeling now? Sending you extra love & light to brighten your day.



thnx i hid gilt thn let it escap thn hid thn ths yr evry got on top of me mom bean ill all my pass thngs jsut seam 2 creeep up on me
it lst iv had peple cum up 2 me sayin i did my bst i cnt do no mor its tim 2 strt thng of yore slf im getn tld
thy did it 2 evn thy saed try 2 tak caree of sum 1its got dem/alz t wz 2 mush for thm
wen mom wz it hom wif me i wz a a nervs rec i wz im nt ashmd 2 admt it im not
it lst in nursun hom i do go 2 sea her 3 or 4 tims a wk
tell i luv her bef i go i only stay abot 30 mins coz afr 30 mins im exsortt i am i no its not moms falt its illnss is mor drain on famly thn it i suffr i no by exsprenses i do
it lst im not getin wok up it 130am in mroin im not tim 2 get up wot tim is it shud i be up
she fogt hose she lid wif me she haz still thng she in 1 she wz brn in hose she livd in 1930w/40s/50s/60s/70s askin for ded peple not bean 2 sea her its hrd 2 exspal sum tims i fond a kndr way of sayn thy gn way sum wear for a bit thy hav
thy enjy thm slfs
but hoplfy ill be givin off betr vibs engyss 2 my slf 2 thes arnd me i will
thnx..........
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  #10  
Old 06-10-2017, 04:40 PM
taurmel taurmel is offline
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Oh wow, you definitely did what you could and it's great that you see her. It sounds like the home is where she needs to be right now because the people there are trained to take care of her illness.

When my ex's grandpa was in a home he felt the same way, whenever we would go to visit we didn't stay too long because he said it drained him watching this man he loved just slipping away more each day. He wasn't the same person either, but he still went to see him to let him know he had love surrounding him. Your exhaustion is understanding but it's so amazing that your mom has you in her life

And being rested is best for your soul, it helps you take better care of yourself and your loved ones :) Glad you can get some sleep now.
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"Live all of your life. Understand it, see it, appreciate it. And have fun." - Joss Whedon
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