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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Love & Relationships -Friends and Family

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  #31  
Old 24-02-2018, 05:31 PM
Rain95 Rain95 is offline
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Multiple partners sure would be hard with jealousy. I know most polyamory communities have failed. They have that TV show with one male and 4 females that seems to be working but then he said on the show that he does not allow his wives to be with anyone except him. So it's a one way thing.
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  #32  
Old 25-02-2018, 12:49 AM
Tortoise Walks Tortoise Walks is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by angelic star
In the above statement , I talked about my friend being serious and committed, in a casual response to the OP. And my friend is a very serious and devoted girl. She is in love and the guy who married is madly in love with her. He traveled half way across the continent to marry her and spend a lifetime with her. I don't think they like the idea of a third person in the dynamic. Lots of couples don't like the idea of a third person in a dynamic up until old age. They will frown at the idea of it. It's not a new concept lol, has been going on for ages now.

So much talk on soul love lol, we can transform intensely and feel 'soul love' for others intensely anyways. People are different, not everyone is growing and evolving by engaging in lust.

I think here some people entertain the idea of being liberal, and for others to understand their 'point of view' but maybe they are only triggered by people who find commitment/ faithfulness with one person or the concept of being devoted to only one person in a marriage/ relationship. They don't like the idea of commitment to one person only. That is the only thing that triggers them.

I have no problem with commitment to one person. I think that is wonderful and amazing... and it also makes it a lot easier. I am not triggered by that... Polyamory is more complex as a relationship structure - especially if you have kids. And I agree people are different... all I am saying is that there can be serious commitment to more than one person - even if it is not understood, desirable, or even possible for you to imagine. That is all... One way is not right or wrong... it's about harmony between people.

I have no agenda to convince anyone to be polyamorous but I imagine a lot of people love more than one person - even romantically. So I choose to be honest about it in my life. Realistically, there is a lot of emotional work, knowledge and communication of self and needs that is required. Definitely need to source happiness from within. I am raising awareness that some people are polyamorous and it's not all about sex/lust, IMO.
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  #33  
Old 25-02-2018, 03:11 AM
angelic star angelic star is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tortoise Walks
I have no agenda to convince anyone to be polyamorous but I imagine a lot of people love more than one person - even romantically. So I choose to be honest about it in my life. Realistically, there is a lot of emotional work, knowledge and communication of self and needs that is required. Definitely need to source happiness from within. I am raising awareness that some people are polyamorous and it's not all about sex/lust, IMO.

I am not interested in your views on relationships and how you live your relationships and what you chose to do. I don't think I have addressed you once or quoted you in any of my statements. If you don't have an agenda, don't repeatedly quote my statements to the OP and other people on this thread and dispute, because they are not addressed to you.
When I am randomly talking about my friend being committed to one person, in a casual response to OP, why are you quoting that statement and talking about what you do in your relationships. I don't want to know your views on commitment. I am not interested to know what you do in your personal life.
People live in and survive relationships all across the globe, most of us have our own share of relationships and many different kind of relationships. Your's is not that unique, because most people fall in love more than once in their lifetime and maybe even love more than one person at a time.
You are free to live your life the way you want to. Find someone else to explain your personal relationships to, chit chat with them about how you live your relationships by, and feel free to raise their awareness. Don't quote or address me again. Thanks.

Last edited by angelic star : 25-02-2018 at 11:21 AM.
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  #34  
Old 25-02-2018, 07:33 AM
Lorelyen Lorelyen is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tortoise Walks
I have no agenda to convince anyone to be polyamorous but I imagine a lot of people love more than one person - even romantically. So I choose to be honest about it in my life. Realistically, there is a lot of emotional work, knowledge and communication of self and needs that is required. Definitely need to source happiness from within. I am raising awareness that some people are polyamorous and it's not all about sex/lust, IMO.

I likewise agree that it's up to individuals but the theory is frustrated by the neurology. The brain works to select a favourite in the mating game which is what it comes down to, although it can change through habituation. With Islamic polygamy at least each child knows and is nurtured by its mum. The father (who has to bear the responsibility of provision) is known. In western, post-Christianity, free-love systems, the question becomes who's the father and what responsibility should they have? Should the community as a whole upbring the children? What if it fails? Thankfully the arrival of the pill in 1961 facilitated free love and reduced the risk of pregnancy.

I can't see how the term polyamory can relate to non-sensual relations as we'd all be "guilty" of it so it becomes meaningless. Agreed most of us feel varieties of love for different people. What I feel for my parents isn't the same love I feel for my b/f (assuming it's love) which isn't the same as I feel for my soul mate or zumba teacher, etc.
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  #35  
Old 25-02-2018, 08:19 AM
angelic star angelic star is offline
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If someone is evolved and deeply spiritual, yes they can love more than one person and be responsible and committed about them. But those might be the rare folks who explore the spiritual context in a partnership and it will not be very hard for many of us on a spiritual forum like this to understand.
Otherwise I agree , if one talks in terms of romantic love, how can there not be non sensual relations anyways if you are still open to the idea of it anyways. Even if someone is being safe, and responsible, the possibility is still there. It is up to the person what they do with that possibility.

People make choices, and this is quite personal and would depend from person to person I feel. As long as two people consent in a partnership, I guess it depends on those two people only. However you cannot justify what you do in your personal life by calling out on those who hold different views, as a challenge to your own views or as challenge to their's.

A close acquaintance of mine just discovered few weeks ago, that she has a step son and for 26 years she didn't know. Her daughter is 28 years old and they were always married when her step son was born, till he died in a car accident and died in the early 90s.. If she would have known that her husband was dating another young woman while he was still married to her, would it have been more acceptable to her ? Given she was a woman in her early 30s with a young daughter. Suppose it was out in open and not hidden. Would it be fair to her , and possible for her to accept that her husband was with someone at the time. She didn't so she says it was 'cheating'. If she had accepted it in spiritual and deep terms like she is now, and has welcomed her step son into her family how would the outcome be. He does not know anything about his father so he excited to meet his family. Despite grievances, would she say it would be better if she knew. She feels it would be better if she knew already, but that wouldn't make her want to stay with him anyways.
Such things bear responsibility , and relationships bear responsibility. I think a mature person, even a truly liberal and open person would understand that and talk about it.
At the end of the day we make choices, not just for others but also for ourselves. It's us who make those choices and that's what defines us, not just in the society at large for show ( as in people like to represent themselves a certain way with labels ). Relationships are personal. What anyone does in their personal life, is their business, unless you are insecured about it and say you want to inform people about it.
Most of us fall in love more than once, and like I said in my first post most of us might be polyamoros that way.
If one loves deeply regardless, and loves more than one person it is acceptable, but then again that would depend from person to person and choices they ultimately make.

This where I stand not to dispute anyone about what they do in their lives. All relationships offer growth, but we all don't chose similarly and we certainly don't need to chose similarly. We are all perfectly capable of defining and chosing what is best suited to us. Thanks.
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  #36  
Old 25-02-2018, 09:45 PM
Lorelyen Lorelyen is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Raziel
It was a fraud,

If you don't believe me check out everyman 1978 Where Have All the Flowers Gone?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p04ch9n9

You don't trust the BBC do you? LOL. I presume you mean the Brussels Bias Corporation?

Quote:
Your explanation forgets the American side of the coin also.

My parents were/are hippies - Dad is pushing 70 and still has long hair but it was a cultural "revolution" that was marketed & advertised. Hardly going to bring anything down now was it?
I wasn't even thinking of the American side. NO movement like that STARTS as marketed and advertised. It took ages for commerce to catch up with it probably because of the bad press. Same with the British Punk scene I'm told.
Both my parents were people of the 60s, both are now pretty successful business people. Possibly they took full advantage of the freedom that broke loose. I don't think they've ever called themselves hippies. Once in conversation, mum said that she'd never be where she is but for "those times" (I suppose meaning that if she'd gone along the established route she'd have probably married into a traditional housewife situation).


Quote:
New age is no threat to any establishment, they had ago at the head shops because of the potency of items sold. I purchased salvia with ease for example.
LOL, quite. Not yet. IIRC I said "when it becomes a threat." Looking at some of the books in our local esoteric shop it's easy to see why it's no threat at the mo. Shame (as I said elsewhere) it doesn't come with maple syrup.
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  #37  
Old 26-02-2018, 02:31 PM
Raziel Raziel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
You don't trust the BBC do you? LOL. I presume you mean the Brussels Bias Corporation?


I wasn't even thinking of the American side. NO movement like that STARTS as marketed and advertised. It took ages for commerce to catch up with it probably because of the bad press. Same with the British Punk scene I'm told.
.

The documentary is former hippies in their own words & 10 years later.

It features the creators of OZ magazine.

I've spoken of the Laurel Canyon crowd - i.e Frank Zappa, The Doors etc all being heavily linked to US Intelligence.

People like to think of the good old days through rose tinted glasses, let them but there are no hippies now so the movement WAS a fad.
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