Where we're at

[Andromeda27]

I just wanted to share all that happened between TF and I in the last week. It has been completely insane and I feel like I'm going crazy because I can't actually talk about this with anyone in my life, so here I am talking to you guys!

So last Sunday marked 8 years since TF and I split up (we were together for almost 3 years). I was trying to sort through my feelings about it and was honestly just really confused and frustrated with everything. 10 day prior I had sent him an email telling him everything I felt and that I was still in love with him, but I hadn't heard back and was starting to think that was it, it's over.

On Monday night I went for a walk, the moon was very bright and there was this crazy amount of energy that seemed to surround me. I said to the Universe "I'm so tired of this, I can't do this anymore. Please either let this connection fade or let something happen". I went home and decided to text TF and see what would happen. He responded, and we chatted for a little while, just about work and such. I asked him if he read my email, he said yes but that he wasn't ready to respond yet. I told him to take his time. I didn't hear anything back after that I figured that was that, we're on for a few more months of silence.

On Tuesday morning I was shocked to wake up to texts from him. We texted each other all day while at work. We talked about his girlfriend, and he told me they had been ring shopping. I was really surprised, this coming from the guy who said he never wanted to get married, and almost broke up with this girl just months ago because she wanted a ring and he didn't want to. Yeah I was disappointed to hear that, but I gave him my well wishes. All of a sudden, I still don't know how this turned around so quickly, our conversation really heated up and we were swapping photos and talking in a way that we really shouldn't have considering he's on the verge or being engaged.

Wednesday morning we again started texting first thing in the morning and talked throughout the day. I told him what we did the night before wasn't fair to his girlfriend, and it shouldn't happen again. He agreed with me, apologized, and told me that it was hard to resist with someone there was such a strong connection with. He said he and his girlfriend have a great relationship but there is something missing. Then we started talking about us and our past and we talked about spirituality and discovered we're on exactly the same page, he said "it's like we're mind twins or something". He said he's resisted talking to me for so long because we tempt each other so much, but that he needs me in his life because I just "get" him. We talked about dreams and meditation and aura's. We stayed up past midnight talking to each other and draining our cell phone batteries.

On Thursday we continued on just the way that Wednesday was. Just absolute bliss being able to talk to him and be completely open, both of us. That night there was this moment where I felt that pulling away, for just a second. I didn't think much of it because things were going so well.

On Friday morning I felt very strange. I knew something was different, not that there was really something wrong, but it felt different. He told me he was just feeling really confused. He couldn't decide what he wanted. He said he wants to follow his desires but he's scared. I told him to take his time, I'm always here. I decided to give him a bit of space so he could sort himself out.

Saturday we ended up skyping for an hour. Oh my gosh to see his face and hear his voice was the best feeling in the world. We texted throughout the day just light hearted things, I just got the sense he's not ready to discuss what he's feeling right now.

Sunday I decided to step back a bit and give him some air. We still texted a little bit but nothing like it was. Just enough to say "I'm still thinking of you" I guess.

At this point I feel like a reunion for us is right around the corner. I know he needs a bit of time to figure out what exactly he wants, but the fact that he's isn't running at all makes me feel like he DOES know he's just not sure how to go about it. He told me he doesn't want to hurt his girlfriend, and he wishes he was just someone who didn't care about other people. I told him to do what HE wants, not what she wants, not what I want, this is his life and his feelings are the ones that matter the most. He told me if he's single I'm the first person he's calling but he doesn't expect me to wait around either... but I told him it's entirely worth the wait.

Overall I would say we're in a very good place right now. I still can't believe some of the conversations we had, I mean these are things I've been dreaming about for so long. I feel like I have to keep pinching myself, it just doesn't seem real!

Absolutely wonderful...thanks for sharing. Hope everything turns out exactly as it's meant to. :)

[smARTistic girl]

Yay! :) good news. Blessings to you all as you work through things.

I have my fingers and toes crossed so hard for you, Andromeda!