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  #1  
Old 23-12-2019, 12:57 PM
Evangeline 77 Evangeline 77 is offline
Seeker
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 33
 
"your vibe attracts your tribe" ?

I keep hearing this recently but what if I've always been alone. Others joined me for a short time only.
My family was not loving, not close to each other, practically I grew up on my own, they only provided me with food and bed but no love.
In school, I didn't have friends, I was bullied for being fat, that was the main reason when someone talked to me and for a year nobody in my class talked to me.
The same thing happened at my first workplace, 2 older women got angry at me for no reason and they stopped talking to me( it was a good thing though)
I never fit in, the people I thought they liked me, they were only around me until they got what they wanted then they disappeared, others just spent time with me when I asked otherwise they didn't care.
I had enough of this and I just stopped talking so you can guess, now I'm completely on my own, only talking to my brother sometimes.

I have never been in love and have trouble attracting men. It's like I'm invisible for them.

It's not even that I'm attracting negative people in my life. I'm attracting hardly anybody.

What can be wrong with my vibe? Any thoughts would be appreciated as I'm in the dark here and I want to do something. Thank you!!!!
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  #2  
Old 23-12-2019, 01:26 PM
hazada guess
Posts: n/a
 
There is nothing wrong with your vibe,some people are mean't to live a life alone for a higher purpose.If you meet somebody that you are mean't to share your life with,you will know,I assure you.Don't try to force anything,take a back seat and see what happens.
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  #3  
Old 23-12-2019, 02:37 PM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
Master
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 7,062
  FairyCrystal's Avatar
Your title says it and answers it. You don't want anybody so you get nobody. Law of Attraction. You repel them yourself.
If you want that changed, work on your vibration, self-esteem, self-love, self-confidence and so on. And some serious inner child work.
It's simply up to you like it is for everybody else in the world. Your choice.
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  #4  
Old 23-12-2019, 04:52 PM
lomax lomax is offline
Master
Join Date: Jul 2018
Location: Greece
Posts: 2,934
  lomax's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangeline 77
I keep hearing this recently but what if I've always been alone. Others joined me for a short time only.
My family was not loving, not close to each other, practically I grew up on my own, they only provided me with food and bed but no love.
In school, I didn't have friends, I was bullied for being fat, that was the main reason when someone talked to me and for a year nobody in my class talked to me.
The same thing happened at my first workplace, 2 older women got angry at me for no reason and they stopped talking to me( it was a good thing though)
I never fit in, the people I thought they liked me, they were only around me until they got what they wanted then they disappeared, others just spent time with me when I asked otherwise they didn't care.
I had enough of this and I just stopped talking so you can guess, now I'm completely on my own, only talking to my brother sometimes.

I have never been in love and have trouble attracting men. It's like I'm invisible for them.

It's not even that I'm attracting negative people in my life. I'm attracting hardly anybody.

What can be wrong with my vibe? Any thoughts would be appreciated as I'm in the dark here and I want to do something. Thank you!!!!
Then work on being attractive.Loose weight,find out what makes a woman atttractive,make sure that your presence is healthy to others,etc..
Unfortunately what you experienced as a child,will define your adulthood as well.But this doesn't mean that you can't make some changes.Maybe you have to change something but you don't know what.
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  #5  
Old 23-12-2019, 05:23 PM
MAYA EL
Posts: n/a
 
Don't take it so personally. You may blame you family or your body or whatever else you can find to blame but that's not the reason why . This is life and life has a way of looking like a million reasons for why it is the way it is for you but it truly is perspective. Example being that I was and am an outcast people only talked to me when they wanted something from me and I had only been in 1 short 6 month non physical relationship by the time I was 23 but the kicker is that I wasn't fat (although I was as a kid) no i was a gym junky i had a better body then pretty much everyone I knew but the problem was that my body got me shamed I was never told "your looking good bro" noooo instead I was only receiving jokes and criticism or "you could improve this" so that I don't look like a "tool" or "back in my day I was as big as you only 2x as strong with 1/2 the size waist you have didn't even workout but did 200 push ups on the deck of the USS blablabla in WW2" lol (true story) so my point is that if you don't blend in and cater to peoples every desire they will attac you like a pack of dogs so that you either obey or leave the pack so that there position does not get jeopardized. And personally I much rather be a lone wolf but be real then to be a drone with a pack
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  #6  
Old 23-12-2019, 09:17 PM
Lorelyen
Posts: n/a
 
It's a soundbite and I doubt it has any real value. I'm highly skeptical about the law of attraction. Think of it taken to its logical conclusion: Apart from at the "highest" level it would be hopelessly boring - meet someone identical? - Someone mentally ill would attract others suffering from the same illness? A feisty person would attract the feisty.

Evangeline 77, my pre-teen life sounds very similar. An icy environment. Frigid parents in spirit as well as physically I guess so how I came into being I wouldn't like to speculate! I couldn't make schoolfriends because I couldn't take them home so I felt uncomfortable visiting others' homes. But while I thought I was leading a very lonely life I look back and see that it taught me to stand on my own feet. Even at about 7 I started leading my own life.

I'm still much of a loner, though I can fit in with my milieu at least - no tribe. A right mix of different people at different depths. Partly that's because an incident at home got me pulled out by the Children's Department. Things changed miles for the better "care"-wise but I still stayed apart.

Quote:
Originally Posted by lomax
Unfortunately what you experienced as a child,will define your adulthood as well.But this doesn't mean that you can't make some changes.Maybe you have to change something but you don't know what.
So I think there's much truth in this. And people can make changes. They can develop aspirations; they can discover and celebrate their strengths and in these days of the web they can make at least a start joining groups. Observation. Awareness.
.
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  #7  
Old 23-12-2019, 05:09 PM
sea-dove sea-dove is offline
Master
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,488
 
I think it's easy to attract others when feeling good and confident about yourself.. so I suggest to work on those things. And make sure you keep giving opportunities for others to connect to you, if you present no opportunities and just throw up walls, things just wont happen.
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  #8  
Old 23-12-2019, 07:17 PM
inavalan inavalan is offline
Master
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,089
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangeline 77
I keep hearing this recently but what if I've always been alone. Others joined me for a short time only.
My family was not loving, not close to each other, practically I grew up on my own, they only provided me with food and bed but no love.
In school, I didn't have friends, I was bullied for being fat, that was the main reason when someone talked to me and for a year nobody in my class talked to me.
The same thing happened at my first workplace, 2 older women got angry at me for no reason and they stopped talking to me( it was a good thing though)
I never fit in, the people I thought they liked me, they were only around me until they got what they wanted then they disappeared, others just spent time with me when I asked otherwise they didn't care.
I had enough of this and I just stopped talking so you can guess, now I'm completely on my own, only talking to my brother sometimes.

I have never been in love and have trouble attracting men. It's like I'm invisible for them.

It's not even that I'm attracting negative people in my life. I'm attracting hardly anybody.

What can be wrong with my vibe? Any thoughts would be appreciated as I'm in the dark here and I want to do something. Thank you!!!!

Try to think from the point of view that your thoughts and emotions, conscious and subconscious, eventually materialize in your life into situations that tend to perpetuate those thoughts and emotions.
__________________
Everything expressed here is what I believe. Keep that in mind when you read my post, as I kept it in mind when I wrote it. I don't parrot others. Most of my spiritual beliefs come from direct channeling guidance. I have no interest in arguing whose belief is right, and whose is wrong. I'm here just to express my opinions, and read about others'.
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  #9  
Old 23-12-2019, 08:50 PM
iamthat iamthat is offline
Master
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Golden Bay, New Zealand
Posts: 3,580
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangeline 77
I keep hearing this recently but what if I've always been alone. Others joined me for a short time only.
My family was not loving, not close to each other, practically I grew up on my own, they only provided me with food and bed but no love.
In school, I didn't have friends, I was bullied for being fat, that was the main reason when someone talked to me and for a year nobody in my class talked to me.
The same thing happened at my first workplace, 2 older women got angry at me for no reason and they stopped talking to me( it was a good thing though)
I never fit in, the people I thought they liked me, they were only around me until they got what they wanted then they disappeared, others just spent time with me when I asked otherwise they didn't care.
I had enough of this and I just stopped talking so you can guess, now I'm completely on my own, only talking to my brother sometimes.

I have never been in love and have trouble attracting men. It's like I'm invisible for them.

It's not even that I'm attracting negative people in my life. I'm attracting hardly anybody.

What can be wrong with my vibe? Any thoughts would be appreciated as I'm in the dark here and I want to do something. Thank you!!!!

Hi Evangeline 77

It sounds as if you are going through life as the invisible woman. Maybe you need to work on your self-image and learn to love yourself and value yourself. This is difficult if you grew up in a family where you felt neither loved nor valued, but at least you seem to be aware of the issues.

You cannot change other people but you can change yourself. If you are still fat, then work to lose weight. A quick search on the internet shows that it is common for overweight women to feel invisible and have low self-esteem. Yes, there are overweight people with bubbly personalities who are popular, but this does not sound like you. Sometimes people overeat for emotional comfort, sometimes large people use their weight as a safety barrier to keep other people at a distance.

In an ideal world people would accept someone exactly as they are, but the reality is that we all make judgements. It may seem unreasonable that you should have to lose weight to become accepted, but that does seem to be how society works.

If you have already lost your fat then focus on the issues of self-love and self-esteem. If you value yourself then others will value you too. If you negate yourself, then others will not notice you.

Peace
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  #10  
Old 23-12-2019, 09:56 PM
ImthatIm
Posts: n/a
 
Evangeline 77 Hello.

Sometimes fear can cripple a person.

I do not know if this is the case with you, I am only sharing part of my life.

My upbringing instilled a crippling fear in me that actually felt quite normal.

So I can only suggest that you keep analyzing yourself and find those areas
you see you need to improve and keep moving forward and taking risks and learning about yourself.
Maybe find non-isolating activities that inspire you that make you feel better about yourself.

Take care.
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