Match/No Match

[psychegrl]

A few years ago a friend of mine told me about her Philosophy for who and what she brings into her life. She called it Match/ No Match.

Essentially it is when you were presented with new information or situations and you see how it fits inside you. Does it help or hurt you? Does it make you better or worse? Does it offend you in some way or is it something that you don't want to look at?

She applied this to people, places, things, ideas, and even food. Making it a non judgement non-attachment decision. If it matched, great! If it didn't match, she moved on without anymore thought.

Recently I have I noticed that people have been less patient with others. Not just here but in my general life. I wonder how much of this has to do with these energies that are pressing us to 'trim the fat' of the things that aren't serving us. So much so that when we see something that does not 'Match' what we feel is right, we feel triggered, even slightly, in some way.

I like this Match/No Match philosophy because it allows me not to get caught up in drama that is not my own. Drama that deflects from the important work that is still waiting for me.

If you see ideas that do not fit within your understanding of things do you feel like you must correct it or do you feel that adding your input helps others?

When making comments to others do you always think from your own point of view or do you try to use the other person's experience as a guide?

Do you think that having so many ideas/POV's out there makes the world better or just creates more confusion?

Do you believe there is a right way?

When you do notice yourself being triggered by something, what do you do?

How do you like to be told conflicting information about your beliefs? For instance if someone wanted to tell you a different point of view how would you like to receive it? Or would you?

More hard questions but may be important in moving forward with all the information we have for one another. I know from my experience the stuff that triggers me is usually not something I want to look at but really need to! LOL

Love and light ♡

[Ariaecheflame]

Originally Posted by psychegrl

A few years ago a friend of mine told me about her Philosophy for who and what she brings into her life. She called it Match/ No Match.

Essentially it is when you were presented with new information or situations and you see how it fits inside you. Does it help or hurt you? Does it make you better or worse? Does it offend you in some way or is it something that you don't want to look at?

She applied this to people, places, things, ideas, and even food. Making it a non judgement non-attachment decision. If it matched, great! If it didn't match, she moved on without anymore thought.

Recently I have I noticed that people have been less patient with others. Not just here but in my general life. I wonder how much of this has to do with these energies that are pressing us to 'trim the fat' of the things that aren't serving us. So much so that when we see something that does not 'Match' what we feel is right, we feel triggered, even slightly, in some way.

I like this Match/No Match philosophy because it allows me not to get caught up in drama that is not my own. Drama that deflects from the important work that is still waiting for me.

If you see ideas that do not fit within your understanding of things do you feel like you must correct it or do you feel that adding your input helps others?

When making comments to others do you always think from your own point of view or do you try to use the other person's experience as a guide?

Do you think that having so many ideas/POV's out there makes the world better or just creates more confusion?

Do you believe there is a right way?

When you do notice yourself being triggered by something, what do you do?

How do you like to be told conflicting information about your beliefs? For instance if someone wanted to tell you a different point of view how would you like to receive it? Or would you?

More hard questions but may be important in moving forward with all the information we have for one another. I know from my experience the stuff that triggers me is usually not something I want to look at but really need to! LOL

Love and light ♡

Hmmm thoughtful thoughts!


Alot is falling away - at least in my reality but I am urging it on if I am honest.

Match/ not match is a nice philosophy to think about.

I have been asking myself more and more "is this serving me".

One thing I might add... is how it is helpful to be very clear about what you need to honour in reguards to personal values - and personal needs and sort of work from there.

I am discovering that with more self - awareness I am more clear on my motives behind my actions... and so I practice when I can to question my motives first and then ask myself if something is really serving me or is it my ego self reacting for some reason. The reasons can be vast as well. I find alot of my addictive actions are stemming from boredom or distractions from making important life decisions... when I feel like this I tend more towards reacting to situations and people rather than conciously choosing my responses.

LOL. As you brought this topic up and as I was thinking about it I kept seeing 121 221 combinations... which was interesting because I was tending to see these combos when learning more about unity conciousness - and connecting from the cosmic heart.

I have actually even started letting go of the need for signs and outside confirmation instead preferring to get in touch with my inner wisdom... this one was coming through very clearly to me though lol.

I have read your post a fes times... as more emerges from it as I do. Lol...
Onion post! It's got layers hehe

[FallingLeaves]

Originally Posted by psychegrl

Essentially it is when you were presented with new information or situations and you see how it fits inside you. Does it help or hurt you? Does it make you better or worse? Does it offend you in some way or is it something that you don't want to look at?

recently it has started hurting, to do this kind of evaluation of things.

Recently I have I noticed that people have been less patient with others. Not just here but in my general life. I wonder how much of this has to do with these energies that are pressing us to 'trim the fat' of the things that aren't serving us. So much so that when we see something that does not 'Match' what we feel is right, we feel triggered, even slightly, in some way.

If you see ideas that do not fit within your understanding of things do you feel like you must correct it or do you feel that adding your input helps others?

I've been led to think it is dangerous to suppose that things that don't 'Match' shouldn't exist within my realm of experience

When making comments to others do you always think from your own point of view or do you try to use the other person's experience as a guide?

if i'm commenting at all it is about sharing however I feel like... another thing I've been led to think is that I shouldn't be trying to 'guide' situations

Do you think that having so many ideas/POV's out there makes the world better or just creates more confusion?

I think the supposition that we can't have things that cause confusion is as bad as anything.

Do you believe there is a right way?

I believe that if you've truly found the 'right' way, you've only found death.

When you do notice yourself being triggered by something, what do you do?

any more, let it happen. But that doesn't mean necessarily that I just let myself say or do whatever comes to mind at the time, either.

How do you like to be told conflicting information about your beliefs? For instance if someone wanted to tell you a different point of view how would you like to receive it? Or would you?

honestly, I think it silly to limit others by tellin them the 'one true way I would like to hear things'. We all have enough problems without also having to be told basically how to placate each other. I think a little more honesty may hurt, but that isn't a reason for you to sugarcoat what you think just to make me feel good. But whether I then choose to stick my head in the sand is up to me

Originally Posted by psychegrl

Essentially it is when you were presented with new information or situations and you see how it fits inside you. Does it help or hurt you? Does it make you better or worse? Does it offend you in some way or is it something that you don't want to look at?

She applied this to people, places, things, ideas, and even food. Making it a non judgement non-attachment decision. If it matched, great! If it didn't match, she moved on without anymore thought.

But this involves a judgement, no? The fact of it being reduced to a binary "yes/no" is still assessing what some thing means to her.

The only way to be non-judgemental about a yes/no decision is toss a coin and accept the outcome so it would seem.

[psychegrl]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

But this involves a judgement, no? The fact of it being reduced to a binary "yes/no" is still assessing what some thing means to her.

The only way to be non-judgemental about a yes/no decision is toss a coin and accept the outcome so it would seem.

I meant that her intent was that the post No Match judgement didn't linger. Like decidingthat she didn't like a food. She made the decision if she wanted it and once she decided not to, that was it. No drama, no deciding if that was a good choice. Simple.

Judgementis necessary for understanding the world but most people get caught up in the small stuff so not to look at the real issues.

It's interesting what we hear vs the interntion of what was said. Another layer of communication and learning. ♡

[FairyCrystal]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

But this involves a judgement, no? The fact of it being reduced to a binary "yes/no" is still assessing what some thing means to her.

The only way to be non-judgemental about a yes/no decision is toss a coin and accept the outcome so it would seem.

I don't think I agree with this. Making a decision about whether it is good or not for you is not judging. You could say a decision is judging, but it's judging for yourself. Nothing wrong with that. If we didn't make any kind of decision, we wouldn't even get out of bed, we likely never even get in there. Life means making decisions all the time: having tea or coffee, going to bed at 10 or 11pm, going to the shop now or later and so on. If I choose tea, I don't judge coffee.

When you decide something isn't good for you, you don't necessarily judge it to be wrong (for everyone). It's just not right for you.
Like when I decide a man is not right for me. I don't judge that man, i can see he is a great guy, one of the best out there. But he is simply not the right match for me. No judgement there.
If I'd have to toss a coin and go with whatever outcome I may have to marry the guy? Not the way to live life.

It's down to what we think judgement to be, then. Fine. I tend to think of it being something people do relative to themselves.... mostly. (Like as opposed to judging a competition or a Court judgement. Or helping someone else make up their mind).

I have to judge many times a day: shopping, crossing the road, driving, whether to accept a date (well, chance would be a nice thing!!! - no, not fair, I have a manfriend - like so many Leos I tend to loyalty!)

so it's just differences in the way we look on discernment.

I concede.

[FairyCrystal]

Originally Posted by psychegrl

.....

If you see ideas that do not fit within your understanding of things do you feel like you must correct it or do you feel that adding your input helps others?
Depends on the situation, the other person, the subject. There's no one answer. It can even go back and forth between those two options within one conversation. Kind of like the teacher becoming the student and vice versa and a few minutes later both being either student or teacher.

When making comments to others do you always think from your own point of view or do you try to use the other person's experience as a guide?
Also depends, like my previous answer

Do you think that having so many ideas/POV's out there makes the world better or just creates more confusion?
Think of how boring life would be if we all held the same POV! Having so many offers the opportunity for growth and expansion.

Do you believe there is a right way?
Yes, a right way for me, a right way for you, a right way for the man in the street and so on. Since we are all different with different POVs and different needs in life,
our 'right way' will be different too. I think it's about respecting that. Sometimes difficult when decision about the right way have to be made for a group of people, like at work or in politics. Then you have to go with what is right for most, and some will always be disappointed.

When you do notice yourself being triggered by something, what do you do?
Find out why I am triggered, because it's a clear indication there's something in me that needs work otherwise I wouldn't have been triggered to begin with.

How do you like to be told conflicting information about your beliefs? For instance if someone wanted to tell you a different point of view how would you like to receive it? Or would you?
Depends on the subject, the situation, the other person and how they convey their POV. Once at work I had an elderly colleague who was leading a compulsory workshop on religion. Now religion is a very sore subject for me, I'm a pagan, past life traumas and so on, lol. Some extremely religious colleagues were having a go at each other,
and I got sick to the stomach, so much so I ran from the room after half an hour of torment. But that elderly workshop leader was something else. He was extremely religious too, but the right way.
He was love, living, breathing, unconditional love. He didn't judge anyone, not even the non-believers, nor those extremists. He loved us all, and our POVs. Now had he wanted to give me a different insight, I would've listened and I considered things. Because he wouldn't force anything on me.
If one of those argumentative extremists had wanted to convince me of their POV... I think WW3 would've started right then and there

So I think if someone tells me in such a way that isn't belittling I will listen. Not necessarily take it on board, but I can listen.
This part works really well between me and my TF. He can sometimes have me totally flabbergabbered with an insight on something I'm talking about, leaving me speechless, lol. Not because it's aggravating, but because it is so good.

More hard questions but may be important in moving forward with all the information we have for one another. I know from my experience the stuff that triggers me is usually not something I want to look at but really need to! LOL

Love and light ♡

Love and light to you too

[psychegrl]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

It's down to what we think judgement to be, then. Fine. I tend to think of it being something people do relative to themselves.... mostly. (Like as opposed to judging a competition or a Court judgement. Or helping someone else make up their mind).

I have to judge many times a day: shopping, crossing the road, driving, whether to accept a date (well, chance would be a nice thing!!! - no, not fair, I have a manfriend - like so many Leos I tend to loyalty!)

so it's just differences in the way we look on discernment.

I concede.

That was the intent of my questions.
To let people respond with how they discern (I love that word!) in situations. I've found that in answering questions like these we can get a peak into how we use our responses and where we are not the outcomes we are desiring. Sometimes even find hidden cra.p that we didn't know was there.

It's a tool I like to use on myself often, especially if I feel like I'm getting too preachy
(something my sister tells me u do when I'm passionate about something )

It's good to hear the world around us and check our bearings. ♡

[FairyCrystal]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

It's down to what we think judgement to be, then. Fine. I tend to think of it being something people do relative to themselves.... mostly. (Like as opposed to judging a competition or a Court judgement. Or helping someone else make up their mind).

I have to judge many times a day: shopping, crossing the road, driving, whether to accept a date (well, chance would be a nice thing!!! - no, not fair, I have a manfriend - like so many Leos I tend to loyalty!)

so it's just differences in the way we look on discernment.

I concede.

You made me smile :)
What you show here is one of the qualities I like so much in Leos, and until recently didn't know they had because I've not known many Leos in life. A bit odd, because I really like them
The man in my life is a Leo, so I'm learning lots about Leos now.
I love how Leos can concede without feeling any less for it. I admit I cannot always do that myself. Not that I keep forcing my view on another, but I often still tend to take things personally
I'm going to work on that, get more of that Leo quality in me. Thank you for this