Jewish pagans?

[Wyaunagh]

Coelacanth, i believe it is important to fallow your intuition, so if this is what you feel you need to do then you should explore it.
Believe it or not I have met others like you. They described themselves as "Jewish with Pagan leanings". I would like to make a couple of points.
First of all, Paganism is an umbrella term that covers a large variety of earth based religions, and despite to popular opinion these spiritualties are very open. Most of them lack centralized doctrine, and quite frankly there is no right or wrong way to do things.
There are actually monotheistic forms of paganism, and yes there are practices that focus on the intersection between earth based spirituality and other faiths. So being Pagan is not necessarily a betrayal to what you know. Have you checked out Kabbalah? i don't know much about it, but i have heard that it uses a lot of earth based elements.
Second. If something does not exist that matches the path you feel drawn to, feel free to forge your own path. Many of the no-pagan paths that exist today, came into being because someone was brave enough to forge their own way.
Third Monotheists and polytheists don't have to have to fight, ALL. There is plenty of room in the universe for all of us. I am a polytheistic practitioner of an earth based spirituality. I work with the Faerie -who are basically trickster beings, but i also work with angelic beings. They actually get along quiet well. It is not a contest.