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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Past Lives & Reincarnation

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  #21  
Old 07-11-2018, 05:50 AM
sentient sentient is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Metafizzypop
I think it's possible for someone to be born into the wrong family, and not the family that they were intended to have.

I think it can cause some real trauma in people. And it can explain why sometimes we hear about family members who are "estranged," or don't have anything to do with each other. They're strangers literally.
Perhaps ……
One situation comes to mind – a baby born to a couple of drug addicts.
The baby looked physically weak, listless - which can be expected, but the auric field of the baby ‘read’: “I didn’t sign up for this – I’m out of here” as if the baby was actively willing her life away.

I heard that the baby didn’t live long after and who could blame her for her choice.
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  #22  
Old 07-11-2018, 06:47 AM
hallow hallow is offline
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It's a really strange world we live in. Full of lessons some good some bad. Some people live help others some people live to destory. Good and bad the lessons learned can be priceless. I know I learned a lot from the bad, what not to do or be. If that bad didn't exist I would have learned nothing. I always like to think just maybe a person who lives to destory can learn something from one who lives to help.
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  #23  
Old 08-11-2018, 06:57 AM
Realm Ki Realm Ki is offline
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No sure if someone has mentioned this idea:

That we for learning/karmic reasons are put in family with our previous worst enemies.

This makes total sense to me. How many explosive family relations have I not seen in life, how many that struggle with reconciling the love and the aversion towards parents and siblings...

What better way to motivate us to work on making 'friends' than in a a life long relationship, that by proximity more or less guarantees we love eachother to some extent?

Not all of my family, but a great deal of them are strange creatures to me, in essence so incomprehensible different... The work it has take to even just find a language between us to approximate communication is insane.

If we are 'put' in this situation by our selves or it is suggested for us and we accept, I don't know. Or even if the lesson is just dumped on us without a say in the matter, somehow I'm not entirely ruling out that possibility... :'D)

This idea made it easier to realize my support in life needs to come from elsewhere. A truce is good progress, for me and my family members! We do not need to be friends..!
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  #24  
Old 10-11-2018, 07:17 PM
7luminaries 7luminaries is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Metafizzypop
No, we never sign on for abuse unless we're masochists. This is another reason I feel people don't pick their families. It's because there are so many children who are subject to abuse from their families. It's not like there's a lesson to be learned from abuse. The only lesson learned is that people can be abusive. We gain nothing from the experience. Who would pick that?

7luminaries, your whole post was wonderfully insightful and comforting and true.
Glad to hear it Meta

In these situations, we have only to draw boundaries and vote with our feet wherever we are able. It's never on us if parents are abusive. We are only responsible for 1) surviving, if possible and 2) drawing our boundaries (this or that is not acceptable) and leaving the situation as soon as possible, both.

The only lesson to be learnt, ultimately, is to realise 1) that we are NOT responsible for their (abusive, neglectful, etc) behaviour and 2) that we ARE responsible for our own.

Full stop

Love & blessings
7L
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  #25  
Old 10-11-2018, 09:13 PM
Ziusudra Ziusudra is offline
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Our souls pick the family. - not your human mind.
But pick is not the right word.
It is a soul agreement between souls well before incarnations.- for all sides.

From human mind, it is difficult to comprehend why one would pick such parent (s).
But human mind did not pick it.
Soul agreement is complex. These agreement may reach back to its origin.
Every human is not the star of its own life scenario. Most often, we are just an extra and fallout for the other ones to learn and to experience. Nonetheless, our souls agree to be in that roles.
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  #26  
Old 10-11-2018, 09:17 PM
Altair Altair is offline
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I don't believe anyone is willingly going to choose to be born in a horrible place or sign some contract that gives them the experience of being a murderer or an abusive parent..
I think it is a simple matter of karma and attraction, not so much a conscious 'picking' of sorts..
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  #27  
Old 11-11-2018, 05:30 AM
sentient sentient is offline
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I am sort of sketching here trying to understand my own dilemma …..

I suppose if your past life and collective conditioning (my Grandmother represented) came from a sort of close-knit tribal/clan setting and a Nature based Culture where you merged your consciousness with the Totality of Nature i.e. lived in a kind of a “Cosmic Womb” situation – well, then you don’t want anything in this life more than to go back to that kind of emotional security it provided – because it is like living in a “Cosmic Marsupial’s Pouch”.

But humanity no longer lives those times – you remember – plus it seems evolution has different ideas as well and out of the “Pouch” you have to emerge at one point - feeling extremely vulnerable to ‘external weather patterns’ of this alien, confusing new world that no longer reflects the Oneness with Nature and the Natural Laws.

So one of the evolutionary lessons for one’s soul here perhaps could be to learn to rely on one’s inner ‘marsupials pouch’ security instead - (not collective) – no matter what kind of challenging situations external circumstances bring – such as a difficult childhood experiences later within the 'family environment'.

Here the archetypal witch (a Narcissist) opposing the archetypal hero’s quest for strengthening inner core values and inner emotional security comes in handy (though it feels as handy as holes in your head), a witch who will not stop at anything – no matter how diabolical in effort to tear those archetypal hero's inner value systems and inner emotional security structures down.

A Narcissist does everything possible so that people around him/her would not establish themselves in their own inner - independent personal authority and have a voice. Yet, thanks to the witch – this is what potentially gets established.

Totally blabbering here but something like that.
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  #28  
Old 13-11-2018, 10:43 AM
PastPilot PastPilot is offline
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You do pick your family but everyone chooses with a different goal in mind. I was told my family, with the exception of one sibling was not known to me prior to being born. My karma is with my sibling not the rest of my family. I was told my function was to act as an anchor to the family I chose but that didn't work out. Still, I was told I succeeded simply because I did not give up trying for the choice of acceptance was not mine but was instead the decision of my family.
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  #29  
Old 15-11-2018, 11:53 PM
linen53 linen53 is offline
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I chose my family that was extensively abusive because they could help me get to where I now am spiritually. Not because of the abuse, but the struggle to get well and forgive which I have done.

No, I would never want to repeat my childhood I had in this incarnation. Ever! But it served it purpose and I was successful in what I was hoping I could accomplish.

This was never supposed to be a 'happy' incarnation. I currently still struggle with other issues not related to my 'family' or childhood. But someday I will have accomplished everything I came here to do and I will be able to go home and be 'happy'.
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  #30  
Old 18-11-2018, 09:35 PM
EmergingPath EmergingPath is offline
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Great thread and discussion!

There are some great book and authors around this topic, with Michael Newton (Life Between Lives) and Brian Weiss (Many Lives, many masters)the two that come to mind that resonate with me.

So, from my perspective I think we need to first realize that our feelings and our response here are coming through our human mind and perspective which perhaps may be different then how we might view this between incarnations. So, regardless of how I feel about this, I realize that whatever I say is only coming from my human perspective.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Metafizzypop
No, we never sign on for abuse unless we're masochists. This is another reason I feel people don't pick their families. It's because there are so many children who are subject to abuse from their families. It's not like there's a lesson to be learned from abuse. The only lesson learned is that people can be abusive. We gain nothing from the experience. Who would pick that?

Good question. Depending upon your belief on how this might work, YOU might pick that, for a couple of reasons that come to mind. I believe that our entire journey through all incarnations is to strive to improve.

But when incarnated, I think you still have free will regardless of your pre-incarnate intentions. Free to wallow in the worst, or best, of human urges.

If in your past incarnation or two you were an abuser to others, perhaps this time around you wanted to learn what it feels to be abused.

Or perhaps to balance their "Karma account.

Or perhaps a close soulmate needed your help to overcome an issue and you agreed to participate. And if you did perhaps that deviated from the initial intentions.

I agree that from a human perspective I would never willingly sign up for abuse. But our non-incarnate memory is purposely kept hidden from most of us so we cannot know our intentions for this incarnation.

Regards!
Jim
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