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16-01-2019, 09:52 AM
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Pathfinder
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 83
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Well that is a good idea to at least write her what you said and see what happens!
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16-01-2019, 02:24 PM
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Guide
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 527
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At this point, I agree...just tell her how you feel and you have nothing to lose. I would maybe leave out the part about the biological clocks ticking (it conjures up a vision of Marisa Tomei in My Cousin Vinny). Speak to her from your heart!
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16-01-2019, 02:30 PM
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Guide
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 473
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”All that being said, there is still a possibility that I could learn some things from her - and maybe she from me - by having a platonic friendship with her. A romantic relationship would be impractical right now anyway because we live 400 miles apart. I could express to her that I feel we have a unique connection and that I would like get to know her better, and that I will not try to pursue a romantic relationship with her. She might actually go for that, and I really have nothing to lose if she doesn't. If I did that, I would still pursue relationships with other women.”
Sounds like a plan!
I agree people suffering from depression ultimately need to work it out solo. However, if you are witness to a loved one in pain, it may help that person to reach out, at least to say ‘you are not alone’.
It was unclear to me in your original post, but I read now she rejected you romantically in the past. TF dynamics are screwy, lol. If you can put the past aside and contact her once more, I hope you will get an answer.
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16-01-2019, 02:49 PM
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Ascender
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 978
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Quote:
Also, say that I was able to help her heal her wounds, and she became much happier and better off emotionally, then she took that happiness and went off and married some other guy. I'd feel pretty ripped off. What would I do then?
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If you really love her unconditionally, you would just want her to be happy, even she choose someone else.
Quote:
All that being said, there is still a possibility that I could learn some things from her - and maybe she from me - by having a platonic friendship with her. A romantic relationship would be impractical right now anyway because we live 400 miles apart. I could express to her that I feel we have a unique connection and that I would like get to know her better, and that I will not try to pursue a romantic relationship with her. She might actually go for that, and I really have nothing to lose if she doesn't.
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You have to truly and genuinely cherish her friendship and want to be her best and life long friend. Then she will want to be a true friend to you as well.
Do not consider friendship as the 2nd option to being her lover.
In TF relationship, the eternal friendship with unconditional love is the core of the connection.
So, trust in that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by InquiringMind
Another important detail is that both my Twin and I would like to have a family, and both of us are feeling the ticking of our respective biological clocks, so we don't exactly have 20 or 30 years to go through all the iterations of our individual healing processes before we can be together. For her, she's got about 5 years to get this whole marriage and children thing started before she's really pushing the upper age limits. So as much as I'd like to let the healing process unfold organically in its own time and in its own way, the harsh reality of biology is that if we both want children, there is a very unforgiving time limit on that, and we don't have 20 years to let the healing process unfold naturally in its own time.
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If your soul planned parenting in this incarnation, you will be a father, with or without your TF's involvement and another soul will plan to be your child.
If you are meant to sharing parenting with your TF in this incarnation, then you two will experience parenting together.
Freewill does not dictate birth, death, and most life events in between...
__________________
"Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore". - Andre Gide
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20-01-2019, 03:13 AM
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Newbie ;)
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 16
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Thanks everyone! I think I will send her a message that expresses that I've always felt a unique connection with her and that I'd like to get to know her more, but that I will not pursue a romantic relationship with her if that's not what she wants. I'll have to think a little more carefully about what to say, and I'll talk more about it when I'm ready.
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