We are being forced apart but cannot stop loving

My best friend and I have been together for almost 3 years and her father is an alcoholic who is seriously jealous over me and physically abuses her. it hurts me so much i cannot bear i am in so much pain how can i learn to deal with this pain and how can i help her more to cope and eventually she wants to live with me but at the time it just isnt possible

[Riboflavin]

Sonfromnamek,

My advice is, keep busy. Get a job if you don't already have one, and work hard so that you can get your own place. Even a crummy apartment is a better environment than an abusive one. Every hour you work towards that goal will make you feel better because you will be doing something about it.

I don't know if you're still in school but when I was in school I worked. So save up every penny so you can get your own place. In the mean time just try to be there for her.

[muileag]

Originally Posted by sonfromnamek

My best friend and I have been together for almost 3 years and her father is an alcoholic who is seriously jealous over me and physically abuses her. it hurts me so much i cannot bear i am in so much pain how can i learn to deal with this pain and how can i help her more to cope and eventually she wants to live with me but at the time it just isnt possible

I'm more sorry than I can express that your friend is living with the abuse from her alcoholic father. I hope that she can find a safe place very soon; no one needs to stay with a person who is physically abusive even if that person is a parent. Are there resources available where you live that can help her leave? I'm sure you feel a lot of pain as you watch her suffer. If I were you, I would channel that pain into action and seek out an agency that can remove her from the situation. Reach out...to a school counselor, a church, a public health organization.

[A human Being]

Before you do anything, address the pain - accept that it's there, and open to it. And when I say open to it, I mean physically, because what we tend to do is close down in an effort to shut out the pain. It's understandable, but it's counter-productive, so take a few deep breaths, in through the nose and out through the mouth, and relax.

You'll be able to think much more clearly when you've vented the pain that's trapped inside. Unfortunately, the majority of people don't make it conscious, and as a result their actions are reactive and come from a bad place. Get to that place of clarity before you act.

Ive made the pain conscious due to the fact i deal with it every single day I feel everything that happens to her as she does to me, she is adopted from a foreign country.. And her real parents she does not know.. But I just graduated high school Im working everyday and saving my money hopefully in july she will be able to move in with me. That is our hopes but we are just have always been there for eachother we will never leave eachother to suffer alone its always been that way. Especially during my struggles last year. Thank you guys a lot i truly am thankful