This is going to sound insane but I feel I must admit it. (H-itler).

Okay. Okay to clarify this right away, I am no n-a-zi supporter or ever was. My father fought in ww2 against the Germans, his brother was even taken into one of the camps and growing up as a little girl i visited his friend who lived in our neighbourhood and was a holocaust survivor.

I never thought of it until I was around 14 or something, even though I even knew as a kid my dad's friend was a survivor .. I never thought any of it .. I never questioned .. I didn't even question his extremely deformed back he had developed from all the work he had to go through, which even thinking of right now depresses me. All I ever thought of when I was a little girl, around him, was feeling like I was an outcast somehow. Like he didn't want me there.

The only memory I really can remember was when my dad asked him to tell me about his time spent there. I was only five or four I can't recall. I remember my dad looking at me, with this ... I don't even know what kind of stare it was. It wasent filled with emotion really. I remember him then looking from me to him and saying "she needs to know these things." I remember him shaking his head and saying something in a different language. But I actually kept waiting for him to tell me, I just kept sitting there by myself waiting patiently.

Back to the point.

To come straight out with it, I find -iler, attractive. for some reason whenever I look at him, even a glimpse, I get this ...... I get this .... uncomprehendable .... strong daze, not even strong, more like extreme, a ... sensation that I know him or have seen him somewhere before. That he is overly .... attractive in a way ... I see this little boy in him ... I feel strongly of how extremely dark he actually was inside ... but outwardly ... there's just this overwhelming feeling I get that does not frieghten me, but at the same time I am terrified.

I just don't understand how when I look at him, it's like looking at a long lost aquaintance. And for some reason I'm always seeing him where he's smiling and "happy". I don't understand how when I look at him I feel I can swear on my whole entire existence that he is familiar looking. I don't understand, why and how is he so recognizable to me.

What is WRONG with me? is this just my brain trying to cope with delirious rationality/fear or?
Please tell me. I cannot understand this. The more I think of it I feel like a horrible, degraded human being.

Don't feel bad...I'm from WWII as well, though didn't make it through very far. I will PM you a place where you can come and feel more comfortable talking about this.

Originally Posted by AmberTopaz

To come straight out with it, I find -iler, attractive. for some reason whenever I look at him, even a glimpse, I get this ...... I get this .... uncomprehendable .... strong daze, not even strong, more like extreme, a ... sensation that I know him or have seen him somewhere before. That he is overly .... attractive in a way ... I see this little boy in him ... I feel strongly of how extremely dark he actually was inside ... but outwardly ... there's just this overwhelming feeling I get that does not frieghten me, but at the same time I am terrified.

I just don't understand how when I look at him, it's like looking at a long lost aquaintance. And for some reason I'm always seeing him where he's smiling and "happy". I don't understand how when I look at him I feel I can swear on my whole entire existence that he is familiar looking. I don't understand, why and how is he so recognizable to me.

What is WRONG with me? is this just my brain trying to cope with delirious rationality/fear or?
Please tell me. I cannot understand this. The more I think of it I feel like a horrible, degraded human being.

And therein lies his power.

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by AmberTopaz

Okay. Okay to clarify this right away, I am no n-a-zi supporter or ever was. My father fought in ww2 against the Germans, his brother was even taken into one of the camps and growing up as a little girl i visited his friend who lived in our neighbourhood and was a holocaust survivor.

I never thought of it until I was around 14 or something, even though I even knew as a kid my dad's friend was a survivor .. I never thought any of it .. I never questioned .. I didn't even question his extremely deformed back he had developed from all the work he had to go through, which even thinking of right now depresses me. All I ever thought of when I was a little girl, around him, was feeling like I was an outcast somehow. Like he didn't want me there.

The only memory I really can remember was when my dad asked him to tell me about his time spent there. I was only five or four I can't recall. I remember my dad looking at me, with this ... I don't even know what kind of stare it was. It wasent filled with emotion really. I remember him then looking from me to him and saying "she needs to know these things." I remember him shaking his head and saying something in a different language. But I actually kept waiting for him to tell me, I just kept sitting there by myself waiting patiently.

Back to the point.

To come straight out with it, I find -iler, attractive. for some reason whenever I look at him, even a glimpse, I get this ...... I get this .... uncomprehendable .... strong daze, not even strong, more like extreme, a ... sensation that I know him or have seen him somewhere before. That he is overly .... attractive in a way ... I see this little boy in him ... I feel strongly of how extremely dark he actually was inside ... but outwardly ... there's just this overwhelming feeling I get that does not frieghten me, but at the same time I am terrified.

I just don't understand how when I look at him, it's like looking at a long lost aquaintance. And for some reason I'm always seeing him where he's smiling and "happy". I don't understand how when I look at him I feel I can swear on my whole entire existence that he is familiar looking. I don't understand, why and how is he so recognizable to me.

What is WRONG with me? is this just my brain trying to cope with delirious rationality/fear or?
Please tell me. I cannot understand this. The more I think of it I feel like a horrible, degraded human being.

Do you think you may have a relation to Eva Braun?

I actually found out @university that a roommate and one of my good friends was a from a branch of the Braun family (can be spelled Brown in English so you wouldn't know). And yes...some are still neonazi supporters...*sigh*...what can you do, that is her family...she herself is not active in that and doesn't live that close. You can't force others to change...you can only set your own example and keep the lines of communication open.

Guess when she told me...LOL...when I was spending the night at her g'parents home. Actually a German cousin (braun) also came to visit periodically and they are still basically simple country folk. They are really not that different from most others where they are from, in whatever country.

Hearts are a blank slate, and yes they can be manipulated. I think one of the biggest lessons of the WW2/Holocaust era was the truth of our common humanity, which we should never forget...

But what can you do, we can't afford to lose any souls in this lifetime to despair and darkness...everyone needs to be accepted & forgiven, and no one should be turned away if they come with a (reasonably) open heart and mind.

Above all...you need to be able to talk about your experiences...I know it's hard, very hard to face a lot of this stuff. But how else can you work through them if you don't feel that you are accepted as you are?

Please believe me...we are not here to judge you but to embrace you on your journey. Everyone comes with stuff they have to accept and weave into the fabric of their own understanding & and of their own lives.

Peace & blessings,
7L

[Spiritlite]

He was indeed a very very charismatic person to a lot of people. I wonder if that is the case?
Spiritlite.

Even Hitler was a wee boy who had parents, ambition and dreams. He was a talented painter. He also had a spirit/soul, although there are those who will disagree. Perhaps in a past life, you knew him as a child. Perhaps you are part of his soul group. Perhaps your spirit knows his and has compassion. No one really knows and to condemm you for feelings which are beyond the hero-worship of neo-nazis would be foolish. Let's face it, many ordinary German people were taken in by his rhetoric and that sort of thing continues across the world today. Thankfully, some are rising up against this illusion and saying 'Enough!'.

I say - forgive yourself for your feelings and ask your soul what the connection is.

[Spiritlite]

I'm with Enya stop feeling guilty about your feelings.
Spiritlite.

Thanks for all your responses. It does help a lot.
I thought much and much more of it, and ended up discovering through my connections I was adding up that a dear friend of mine who isnt on this earth anymore was also extremely close to me when the third reich was happening ..

I have a feeling I might of been at this event in his company. The one showed in Rammstein's Stripped music with the video of "Olympia Part Two - Festival of Beauty"

I just ....
At 2:10 it's like a explosion of .. as if I... seeing him physically right in my sight, like I'm actually there seeing him for real. It also happens at 5:42. Right there ..... it just gets me that overwhelming sense again. It's at an extreme point.

I can't exactly figure out why I still strongly feel the way I do, because I also feel and sense I was victimized by his power. And the more I think of it the more I started getting mentally flooded with recollectional memories of learning about the nazi experiments, and all I can think of at the same time is my friend. All I can think right now is, I must of upset him somehow. Or, with his purely dark energy he simply turned against.

I don't understand why his existence came to be. I suppose .......... I don't even know what to say anymore.

I appreciate all your responses dearly.

I only have one question. If I was apart of his soul group .................................................. ..................... would I recieve bits of karma for his actions ?



.................................................. ....................................

that would explain a lot.

Originally Posted by AmberTopaz

Okay. Okay to clarify this right away, I am no n-a-zi supporter or ever was. My father fought in ww2 against the Germans, his brother was even taken into one of the camps and growing up as a little girl i visited his friend who lived in our neighbourhood and was a holocaust survivor.

I never thought of it until I was around 14 or something, even though I even knew as a kid my dad's friend was a survivor .. I never thought any of it .. I never questioned .. I didn't even question his extremely deformed back he had developed from all the work he had to go through, which even thinking of right now depresses me. All I ever thought of when I was a little girl, around him, was feeling like I was an outcast somehow. Like he didn't want me there.

The only memory I really can remember was when my dad asked him to tell me about his time spent there. I was only five or four I can't recall. I remember my dad looking at me, with this ... I don't even know what kind of stare it was. It wasent filled with emotion really. I remember him then looking from me to him and saying "she needs to know these things." I remember him shaking his head and saying something in a different language. But I actually kept waiting for him to tell me, I just kept sitting there by myself waiting patiently.

Back to the point.

To come straight out with it, I find -iler, attractive. for some reason whenever I look at him, even a glimpse, I get this ...... I get this .... uncomprehendable .... strong daze, not even strong, more like extreme, a ... sensation that I know him or have seen him somewhere before. That he is overly .... attractive in a way ... I see this little boy in him ... I feel strongly of how extremely dark he actually was inside ... but outwardly ... there's just this overwhelming feeling I get that does not frieghten me, but at the same time I am terrified.

I just don't understand how when I look at him, it's like looking at a long lost aquaintance. And for some reason I'm always seeing him where he's smiling and "happy". I don't understand how when I look at him I feel I can swear on my whole entire existence that he is familiar looking. I don't understand, why and how is he so recognizable to me.

What is WRONG with me? is this just my brain trying to cope with delirious rationality/fear or?
Please tell me. I cannot understand this. The more I think of it I feel like a horrible, degraded human being.

why do good girls like bad guys? one reason....

[in progress]

Sometimes when souls incarnate they add energetic overlays of other souls' lives to add to their own experiences for use during the incarnation. As an incarnated soul you could not tell the difference if it was truly your past life or a borrowed one.

In terms of karma I would not worry. There are often things about situations we don't understand while here.

This is how I understand it.