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  #1  
Old 14-10-2011, 06:41 AM
Elfay Elfay is offline
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Book1 Anyone Homeschool their child(ren)?

We had to take our 12 1/2 year old son out of school, he is an Aspie (Aspergers Syndrome) and has been in an "Mild" Autistic class for the last year and a 1/2. He learned nothing in that year and a 1/2 other than to color a turkey placemat for Thanksgiving when in 5th grade and a lot of assinine, very childish assignments. Which apparently is quite common here in the public school system.

Yes we had an IEP, we had one for him since 2nd grade. He was miss placed too many times (placed in wrong types of special Ed classes) it was incredible. It also seems as if most of the Special Ed teachers are not very compassionate, they are very strict and demanding - for all the wrong reasons. Instead of being taught what he should have been learning my son is very far behind.

The only time he was up to par on his grade level was 3rd grade, his teacher was marvelous, he was in a Speech and Language program and he did very well. The teacher had the kids doing algebra and geometry and my son was getting really good at it.

4th grade we moved and he went to an awful school and had an equally terrible, mean teacher. She picked on my son every day. It was so out of control he couldn't deal with it. We struggled to get him out of the class and we finally did and he was given more testing and the darn school "detirmened" he was more Autistic than anything. Mildly Autistic. He was more an Aspie but the school couldn't place him in an Aspergers class because they were all full.

It seems that a lot of the Special Ed teachers are huge on discipline and are very severe with their punishments. What happened to Special Ed teachers that cared and understood? I guess they don't exists any more. My son is not nor has ever been a discipline problem. He has no record of disciplinary action other than cutting a little girl's hair in Kindegarten. He was placed in the Opportunity Room for the day and learned nothing. He was 5 and 5 year old boys do things like cut girls hair, not saying its right, it wasn't. My brothers use to cut my hair when I was little and all my dolls hair off.

Well he was placed in a Mild Autistic class where he was the best student, best behaved (the other kids cried, screamed, kicked, had tantrums) my so has always been a good student, very well behaved. However the teacher was so slack with the students and in 5th grade his teacher was worse. There was even more crying going on and on a daily basis. To the point it would drive my son crazy and not be able to do his work.

His 5th grade teacher never caught my son to be on his grade level. Even though in IEP meetings we demanded it - among other things.

Now he's in 6th grade and he has the worst teacher ever. She's nasty, unbending just plain mean. She accused my son of cheating on a spelling test, he was sitting by himself with the test on his desk, he had nothing but a pencil with him, the Parapro was sitting behind him. He had only written one spelling word on the piece of paper when the teacher grabs it and accusses him of cheating and told him he was to have sielent breakfast, lunch and break time - he is not allowed to talk or socialize with anyone during those times, for the rest of the school year!!! My son happens to be a pretty good speller, on his last spelling test he got an 80%. He doesn't cheat. Never did. Plus there was no one there to cheat off of. She claimed later he had written the answers on a label or something - crib notes!! He doesn't even know how to cheat. He's as honest as they come when it comes to school.

We took it to the VP of Special Ed and the Principal and she still believes she did the right thing and refuses to apologize to my son.

My son is terrified of the women. He views her like the Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard of Oz. My son can not learn in such an enviroment, he tries but he can't. He is so sensitive he knows the teacher hates him. She's picked on him since day one. As has other Special Ed teachers.

I have had dreadful teachers, my husband has, we all have, we deal with them. Only my son doesn't have the skills to "deal" with it. He won't, can't. Its who he is and this is where his being an Aspie comes in.

So we took him out and are homeschooling him. The only requirement in the state of Georgia is that you either have a high school diploma or a GED. My husband has a BA in business management, he excelled in math. I on the other hand suck at math (I have Dascalculia (sp) ) but can help in other lessons.

Its only been about 5 days since he's been homeschooled yet he's probably learned more in those 5 days than he did in 5 months in school.

My son is very intelligent but doesn't show it in the regular class room or when it comes to standardized tests.

Yes its difficult homeschooling but he is learning and dreads going back to the Public School.

Anyone homeschool your children? What were your reasons and is it working for them - and yourself in the long run? Its very time consuming and challenging. We know about the cons, not being around peers, though he wasn't learning with his peers who were acting up all the time and bullying. For us the pros far outweight the cons right now. Not saying we won't ever put him back into the school system again, we probably will since the reality is we will both be working.

We are doing our own curriculum so its a lot cheaper than the ones online you can buy. Especially since we are broke. And we do know the State laws here and we sent in our letter of declaration.

Thoughts and opinions welcomed.
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It isn't about karma. It is about love. Love is beyond karma. Karma can be very easily neutralized with Love.

I don't share my thoughts because I think it will change the minds that think differently.

I share my thoughts to show the people who already think like me that they're not alone.



"Good bits of wisdom Elfay the future isn't carved in stone, it is a book waiting to be written." - Adrienne
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  #2  
Old 14-10-2011, 06:57 AM
psychoslice psychoslice is offline
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I don't have children myself, but the church that I go to has a few parents that home school their kids, i have to say that all those children are so well behaved and also very intelligent, they all can play musical instrument beautifully, I think if your brave enough to do it, well do it, you have nothing but all to gain.
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  #3  
Old 14-10-2011, 12:22 PM
scorpiowitch66
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Hi Elfay,

You are such a good momma. My oldest has Aspergers too and I understand how frustating the schools can be. Fortunately, he only had one bad teacher and right now he is in community college. It still is a struggle, but we do what we can.

I agree with psychoslice that homeschooled kids are some of the most well mannered, sweetest kids around...I think as long as you find some sort of socialization for him, maybe a community sport team or maybe boy scouts, he will be fine. You may even be able to find some sort if asperger support group in your area.
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  #4  
Old 14-10-2011, 01:13 PM
sound sound is offline
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Hi Elfay

I didnt home school my children however I have several friends who have and they would not have it any other way. I am in Australia and we do have a brilliant support program set up for children who are living in remote areas and need home schooling.
I also have friends who have home-schooled for part of their children's education and then enrolled their children in Rudolph Steiner schools which have been very successful. Rudolph Steiner himself was able to apply very effective teaching methods with children who had learning disabilities/difficulties ...there are lots of wonderful examples in his biography. Many of his methods and strategies are being employed wholeheartedly to this day.
I was talking to a good friend recently whose children are enrolled in a Steiner school and some of the teaching methods they use are so creative ... I wont ramble on any more but definitely worth looking into ... I work with children and can totally appreciate the methods being employed both from a professional perspective and as a parent of 2 :) Below is a link, compliments of Wiki, for you to check out if you want

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waldorf_education
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  #5  
Old 14-10-2011, 01:44 PM
iolite
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Elfay...

Aren't asperger kids usually gifted and quite intelligent? If that is the case with your son, then home schooling sounds like the right choice right now for him. There are lots of online teaching sites like Time 4 Learning and lots of work books you can get on amazon to help with instruction. Have you looked around for private schools that deal with learning disabled kids?

I home schooled my daughter briefly in 3rd grade. We moved to Richmond to enroll her in Richmond Waldorf in 2nd grade. What a disaster!!! She actually lost ground academically. She was in public school for kindergarten and 1st grade and her math skills were at grade level and her reading was above grade 1 in 1st grade. A year and a half at a Waldorf school and her math skills actually atrophied and degraded as well as her reading skills. We enrolled her in Huntington Learning Center to get her at grade level in reading and math and I taught her science and history. Over the summer, I had her do language arts and math in work books to get her ready for 4th grade. She worked at a pretty intense pace to get ready, but it was worth it because she sailed through 4th grade.

There are lots of home school sites if you search for them, by area, so you can hook up with other kids for field trips and projects. Some places have arrangements with local public schools to allow home schoolers to take classes like math or science there.

I followed the curriculum of VA's SOL's. The SOL's are posted by grade and subject and list the curriculum. It was pretty easy to follow and I got lesson books on amazon.

Home schooling isn't hard, it does take time to find resources though. Check with your local home schooler groups (try google and search yahoo groups) and see if your state has laws that require the local public schools to provide you with text books if you want them. That will be a big help and a huge cost savings too for you. Also, look at the SOL's for him to give you an idea as to what you need to include. But also allow your son to drive some of the lesson plannings. Let him include stuff he'd like to study too. That is the great thing about home schooling. You have so much flexibility in what you teach and how long you want to spend on a particular unit.

Last edited by iolite : 14-10-2011 at 06:41 PM.
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  #6  
Old 15-10-2011, 08:03 PM
Elfay Elfay is offline
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Thank you everyone for your awesome advice and support ! It helps a lot, especially when you aren't sure you made the right choice. It was the only choice we really had. The public schools were failing our son. Failing terribly.

My son is a very intelligent, creative, wonderful boy but had been stiffled since we first put him in PreK at 4.

We do balance academics with fun things. He will go out for about 30-45 mins and play basketball and come back in and finish up his school work. We socialize our son a lot, always have. He still has a very difficult time talking with kids his own age and when he does he finds it hard to keep his friendships unless he meets a boy like himself and he has only the boy's parents didn't want their son being friend's with our son - not sure why, I suppose it scared them that our son was like their son??? Not sure.

I will look into some of the info you all gave me. Thank you again.
__________________

It isn't about karma. It is about love. Love is beyond karma. Karma can be very easily neutralized with Love.

I don't share my thoughts because I think it will change the minds that think differently.

I share my thoughts to show the people who already think like me that they're not alone.



"Good bits of wisdom Elfay the future isn't carved in stone, it is a book waiting to be written." - Adrienne
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  #7  
Old 22-10-2011, 05:06 AM
MMM
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coming from an educational career, i can say successful homeschooling requires requires a right mix of factors
- a intelligent parent that knows and can present the material correctly (the knowing part is not so much an issue for 5th grade math but you will learn HOW we all learn as you guide your child through the material)
- a support system (everything from someone to sound ideas off of to a friend who can take you out or lunch when you're a bit stressed)
- professional development (this is a biggie the longer you home school or the more children you home school) it's very helpful to hone your skills year after year - professional teachers do it and you should to

i quit teaching to form my own business but many o my customers are home schooling parents (i have a book store)
i taught 1 year in the usa then went overseas - the american teachers who teach in my country say public school teaching in the usa is in the toilet

good luck, try ebay for low cost items , sometimes goodwill and other charity shops will get in good material
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  #8  
Old 22-10-2011, 05:53 AM
nightowl
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Hey Elfay,

I can understand your reasoning for making this decision. I homeschooled my 2 children. We had a number of different reasons for doing so. My son is a very deep thinker and struggled socially and my daughter has mild Tourette's. They both did fine in homeschooling. My son is like me in that he just doesn't get math even though my husband is an electrical engineer. My son is a philosopher historian by talent and my daughter is into the arts, she acts and plays piano.They are both taking college courses as of now. My son is interested in computer repair, hates the idea of being an academic, he also has an Ebay business and my daughter is training in video editing and photography. I taught them to do what they love not what society expects of them. Though at times I wonder if I taught them too well to be independent thinkers ... They did social activities like most kids scouts, dancing lessons and the like. We wanted to teach our children different then what the public schools covered and the social peer pressure was disturbing to me. So we took the leap...

Ebay is a great place for curriculum, library sales and homeschool networking is a great help as well. I used some of the free lessons that are available online and used movies as well. We went the umbrella school route as opposed to having the public school monitor our work. Our children earned a HS diploma not just a GED but either way works. I will be happy to chat with you anytime you need or want, feel free to contact me if you like Elfay Best wishes in your endeavors.
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Old 22-10-2011, 04:46 PM
Elfay Elfay is offline
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Thank you again for everyones honest replies and advice.

My son has learned way more in the last 12 or so days (I have the exact days on paper) then he has in all the years he's been in public school. He's very intelligent, he just doesn't learn in the traditional ways and the school systems are not built to teach children on this level. He is highly intelligent, very creative and as I always knew very good in math. He started reading at the age of 2, didn't comprehend it until he was older but he read well. When he lost all that he had learned as soon as he entered PreK at 4. He was different than most of the kids, he was smart, very open to learning and he could carry on a very intelligent conversation with adults. The other kids thought he was weird and he was contantly bullied. He became afraid of going to PreK. These were 4 & 5 year old mind you!! I remember loving what once was called, Nursery School, when I was 4. I also loved Kindergarten at 5. Times have changed and the school system here has been SO far behind for a long, long, long time and the kids of today are having to make up for what the system was lacking. They are expecting these kids to make up for all the years the school system was lacking.

Kids seem to go into school knowing everything. How to write their name at age 4, how to tie their own shoes, how to cut straight with scissors. We weren't allowed to use scissors until probably 1st or 2nd grade. It was the teachers job to teach the children how to print their names (in 1st grade).

Yes I went to Kindergarten in the 60's and things have changed too drastically. And what has hurt, especially my son, Is The No Child Left Behind law.

Thanks nightowl, I will take you up on that. I love hearing sucess stories. My son also has mild Tourettes that was more medication (Ritalin) induced than anything and his ticks are hardly visable since we took him off ALL medications 2 years ago. We stopped the Ritalin and "hard" stuff 5 years ago but it seemed to have messed him up a lot still. Biggest mistake we ever did was lettin the school dictate how to raise our child. He is highly sensitive to most medications and developed the ticks and seizuers after taking it.

Very happy to say he's been seizure free for over 2 years now and its awesome!! Though the meds did something to him that unfortunatly could be permanent. Not only did those meds turn him into an epileptic and have ticks, he became very hostile and suicidal at the age of 8 years old. The anti-seizure meds were making him both hostile and suicidal as well as very, very agressive. The agression and hostility never fully left him. He hasn't been suicidal in over 2 years (thank goodness) but his rages are increasing.

__________________

It isn't about karma. It is about love. Love is beyond karma. Karma can be very easily neutralized with Love.

I don't share my thoughts because I think it will change the minds that think differently.

I share my thoughts to show the people who already think like me that they're not alone.



"Good bits of wisdom Elfay the future isn't carved in stone, it is a book waiting to be written." - Adrienne
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  #10  
Old 22-10-2011, 06:19 PM
nightowl
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Elfay,

Your story with the public school system sounds a good bit like what my sister went through. My nephew was diagnosed late in his teens with a seizure disorder and bi-polar he went through hell as a child in the system. She got into a heated debate when he was young because she refused to put him on Ritalin and had to fight for the right testing. He eventually quit school...

It is really neat to watch your kids learn and grasp something new, have fun with it. Be creative we learn in many different ways. My daughter is a visual learner she did really well when I coupled lessons with movies to either re-enforce the concept or as an opposing view of the concept. My son on the other hand was like a sponge when it came to reading information, what worked for him didn't work for my daughter and vise versa...so use whatever methods that goes with your sons style...he will do great...

Chat with you later...
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