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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Indigo, Crystal, & Star Children

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  #1  
Old 16-01-2019, 03:03 AM
WestonG WestonG is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 20
 
I Need Advice. What Am I?

Hey,

I've just stumbled across this concept and feel I'm tumbling down the rabbit hole. From birth I've felt different. Like I didn't belong. Like nobody thinks the way I do. I have memories of being so aware, observational and able to judge people and situations. From an age most people don't retain memory off. My father was always baffled by the wisdom and knowledge I possessed from a very young age. My mother used to say I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. She used to say I was an angel. I was disinterested in conventional life. I shunned education. I have many views of and see clearly where humanity is going wrong. I have a strong affinity with animals and nature. I could calm stray dogs and befriend wild animals from a toddler. They always seemed to trust me. I sense that animals are pure beings. I have always felt a strong sense of interconnection in the world. It's hard to explain but I feel like I see everything around me as almost the same matter. I place very little value on material possessions.

I have had strong empathy from a young age. To this day I cannot stand people arguing or animosity of any kind. I have to remove myself as it almost physically pains me. I can feel an atmosphere in a room and feel I can almost see a person's soul when I look into their eyes. Like I know someone intrinsically before they say a word. People seem initially frosty and unsure of me and I of them. But quickly seem to act like they've known me for years when I feel estranged to them. Unable to connect. It makes me uncomfortable. I have few friends but those I have seem to value me and my presence in some way I cannot explain. I find the corruption and cruelty of humanity abhorrent. I have a strong sense of things not being right in the world.. I've always felt old and world weary. I feel ancient now. I'm 27. I stare deep into the sky at night and feel at home. It almost energises me. I have a strong interest in science and science fiction. Science was always my strongest subject and something I seemed to intrinsically understand. Children have always seemed fascinated by me. To the point that people I was with would always ask me puzzled "Why is that kid starring at you like that".

I have never slept well. I used to see apparitions and feel a presence regularly. Now I experience insomnia, vivid dreams that often come true and sleep paralysis. I used to lie awake for hours each and every night thinking of ways I could fix or save humanity. I have recurring dreams of the end of the world and a strong sense of doom. This next bit sounds crazy and I'm reluctant to share... but I feel like I am far more powerful than my physical form. Like I can leave my body and fly. And I want to. I feel trapped and imprisoned in this body. I also feel like some force is with me. And sometimes is trying to communicate. I used to tell it to come take me. "Now. I want to leave". "I don't want to be here any more" "I can't help these people". I felt like this force or presence had the ability to lift me above the earth and take me home.

I'm not in a good place now. I have been heavily depressed for a number of years and suffer with generalised and social anxiety. I can't cope with being in public or locked into a conversation. It overwhelms and exhausts me. I have become bitter and resentful of humanity. My dreams of saving the world have somewhat turned to thoughts of ending it. The presence I always felt with me has faded. Maybe gone. I feel naked. Alone. Powerless. Empty without it. All I can think is " I want to go" I want to leave" "I don't want to be here". One thing I have never experienced is a clear memory of a past life. Or where I come from. I just have a sense of it. If there is any efficacy to all this... I theorise I have not yet been awoken. May not have yet remembered. I used to spend hours in bed each night searching my soul voraciously for an answer I could feel so strongly but never find. I feel I may have given up searching.

I don't know what to do.

Please ask for any more information,

Thank you
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  #2  
Old 16-01-2019, 08:49 AM
John32241 John32241 is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Lowell, Massachusetts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WestonG

Children have always seemed fascinated by me. To the point that people I was with would always ask me puzzled "Why is that kid starring at you like that".

That kid can see you are different by looking at your merkaba's personal energy field. We all have one and for sure you are different.

Quote:
I feel like I am far more powerful than my physical form. Like I can leave my body and fly. And I want to. I feel trapped and imprisoned in this body. I also feel like some force is with me. And sometimes is trying to communicate. I used to tell it to come take me. "Now. I want to leave". "I don't want to be here any more" "I can't help these people". I felt like this force or presence had the ability to lift me above the earth and take me home.

True, you can not help these people. We are all a lot more powerful than our physical form, you can sense that, most can not.

Quote:
One thing I have never experienced is a clear memory of a past life. Or where I come from. I just have a sense of it. If there is any efficacy to all this... I theorise I have not yet been awoken. May not have yet remembered. I used to spend hours in bed each night searching my soul voraciously for an answer I could feel so strongly but never find. I feel I may have given up searching.

When we become human we are locked into our human intellect which has no memory of our true spiritual eternal ways of being. It is the veil between our 4D reality and the truest greater reality we constantly reside in.

You have not yet awakened to this grander existance in human form. I encourage you to not give up searching. When you set your intent to find that door to your divine self, and open it, then your search will bring you results.

I sense you are what some call a Star Seed. That is a being with previous life times on evolved planets not like the barbaric primitive earth. You chose to come here to influence human evolution I suspect. You are frustrated because it looks hopeless to you. No problem. You just being here makes things better.

John
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  #3  
Old 16-01-2019, 09:15 AM
Gem Gem is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 18,949
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WestonG
Hey,

I've just stumbled across this concept and feel I'm tumbling down the rabbit hole. From birth I've felt different. Like I didn't belong. Like nobody thinks the way I do. I have memories of being so aware, observational and able to judge people and situations. From an age most people don't retain memory off. My father was always baffled by the wisdom and knowledge I possessed from a very young age. My mother used to say I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. She used to say I was an angel. I was disinterested in conventional life. I shunned education. I have many views of and see clearly where humanity is going wrong. I have a strong affinity with animals and nature. I could calm stray dogs and befriend wild animals from a toddler. They always seemed to trust me. I sense that animals are pure beings. I have always felt a strong sense of interconnection in the world. It's hard to explain but I feel like I see everything around me as almost the same matter. I place very little value on material possessions.

I have had strong empathy from a young age. To this day I cannot stand people arguing or animosity of any kind. I have to remove myself as it almost physically pains me. I can feel an atmosphere in a room and feel I can almost see a person's soul when I look into their eyes. Like I know someone intrinsically before they say a word. People seem initially frosty and unsure of me and I of them. But quickly seem to act like they've known me for years when I feel estranged to them. Unable to connect. It makes me uncomfortable. I have few friends but those I have seem to value me and my presence in some way I cannot explain. I find the corruption and cruelty of humanity abhorrent. I have a strong sense of things not being right in the world.. I've always felt old and world weary. I feel ancient now. I'm 27. I stare deep into the sky at night and feel at home. It almost energises me. I have a strong interest in science and science fiction. Science was always my strongest subject and something I seemed to intrinsically understand. Children have always seemed fascinated by me. To the point that people I was with would always ask me puzzled "Why is that kid starring at you like that".

I have never slept well. I used to see apparitions and feel a presence regularly. Now I experience insomnia, vivid dreams that often come true and sleep paralysis. I used to lie awake for hours each and every night thinking of ways I could fix or save humanity. I have recurring dreams of the end of the world and a strong sense of doom. This next bit sounds crazy and I'm reluctant to share... but I feel like I am far more powerful than my physical form. Like I can leave my body and fly. And I want to. I feel trapped and imprisoned in this body. I also feel like some force is with me. And sometimes is trying to communicate. I used to tell it to come take me. "Now. I want to leave". "I don't want to be here any more" "I can't help these people". I felt like this force or presence had the ability to lift me above the earth and take me home.

I'm not in a good place now. I have been heavily depressed for a number of years and suffer with generalised and social anxiety. I can't cope with being in public or locked into a conversation. It overwhelms and exhausts me. I have become bitter and resentful of humanity. My dreams of saving the world have somewhat turned to thoughts of ending it. The presence I always felt with me has faded. Maybe gone. I feel naked. Alone. Powerless. Empty without it. All I can think is " I want to go" I want to leave" "I don't want to be here". One thing I have never experienced is a clear memory of a past life. Or where I come from. I just have a sense of it. If there is any efficacy to all this... I theorise I have not yet been awoken. May not have yet remembered. I used to spend hours in bed each night searching my soul voraciously for an answer I could feel so strongly but never find. I feel I may have given up searching.

I don't know what to do.

Please ask for any more information,

Thank you




It sounds like you have become a little jaded, and with good reason. A lot of stuff sucks.


The spiritual inquiry is pretty tough because in a sense you are completely alone with that, but not necessarily without support.


Maybe just be as you are now, let the world be the way it is... and breath a sigh of relief.
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  #4  
Old 16-01-2019, 02:24 PM
WestonG WestonG is offline
Newbie ;)
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 20
 
Thank you for the replies

Information regarding Star Seeds does seems to resonate with me. Listening to people describe the characteristics or reading up on the subject, gives me chills, goosebumps and my hair stands on end. I feel a rush of energy travelling up my spine. I've always fervently believed in extraterrestrial life. At one time I was obsessed with the star system Zeta Reticuli. Long before I had any knowledge of the concept of Star Seeds. It occurs to me now that the system is a twin star system. And I am a Gemini. Could I have some intrinsic, latent connection to it?

I have great difficulty relaxing and I rarely have the luxury of breathing a sigh of relief. I feel an incredibly strong sense of something ominous and catastrophic approaching. And an equal sense of my needing to fulfil something before that happens. I dream of a star going super nova. I see the cataclysmic energy building and steadily approaching me. I feel I'm on a planet... but I can't say if it's earth or that the star is our sun. It blinds me, all turns to white and then I wake. I always read it as a doomsday prophecy, of sorts. But I wonder now, in hindsight, if it could be a memory of a prior death? I somehow know the answers lie within me. I've always been reluctant to dig too deep. Or even truly embrace any of this. I thought I would simply go insane in my search. Or that this feeling and the influence, or presence was possibly even negative and looking to do me harm.

I have definitely become jaded. I spend a lot of time researching things within human society that horrify me. And inspire me with little hope for the future of humanity. It fatigues and weakens me. I need to anchor myself somehow. I'll continue to research the subject and plan to meditate, to calm myself and perhaps reconnect with whatever energy or presence I once so strongly felt. I feel I've damaged that connection in my melancholic state. I also need to understand how to control empathy. I am overwhelmed with emotion and bombarded with intrusive thoughts when I'm around people. I feel somewhat at peace when I'm alone. Especially in nature. Though I can rarely brave the outside world to enjoy it.

Further advice, opinions or suggestions are most welcome. This is all so new... yet somehow familiar to me.
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  #5  
Old 16-01-2019, 02:24 PM
WestonG WestonG is offline
Newbie ;)
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 20
 
EDIT: Can someone delete this duplicate response? I was logged out after typing and I think logging back in caused a double post.
Thank you for the replies

Information regarding Star Seeds does seems to resonate with me. Listening to people describe the characteristics or reading up on the subject, gives me chills, goosebumps and my hair stands on end. I feel a rush of energy travelling up my spine. I've always fervently believed in extraterrestrial life. At one time I was obsessed with the star system Zeta Reticuli. Long before I had any knowledge of the concept of Star Seeds. It occurs to me now that the system is a twin star system. And I am a Gemini. Could I have some intrinsic, latent connection to it?

I have great difficulty relaxing and I rarely have the luxury of breathing a sigh of relief. I feel an incredibly strong sense of something ominous and catastrophic approaching. And an equal sense of my needing to fulfil something before that happens. I dream of a star going super nova. I see the cataclysmic energy building and steadily approaching me. I feel I'm on a planet... but I can't say if it's earth or that the star is our sun. It blinds me, all turns to white and then I wake. I always read it as a doomsday prophecy, of sorts. But I wonder now, in hindsight, if it could be a memory of a prior death? I somehow know the answers lie within me. I've always been reluctant to dig too deep. Or even truly embrace any of this. I thought I would simply go insane in my search. Or that this feeling and the influence, or presence was possibly even negative and looking to do me harm.

I have definitely become jaded. I spend a lot of time researching things within human society that horrify me. And inspire me with little hope for the future of humanity. It fatigues and weakens me. I need to anchor myself somehow. I'll continue to research the subject and plan to meditate, to calm myself and perhaps reconnect with whatever energy or presence I once so strongly felt. I feel I've damaged that connection in my melancholic state. I also need to understand how to control empathy. I am overwhelmed with emotion and bombarded with intrusive thoughts when I'm around people. I feel somewhat at peace when I'm alone. Especially in nature. Though I can rarely brave the outside world to enjoy it.

Further advice, opinions or suggestions are most welcome. This is all so new... yet somehow familiar to me.
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  #6  
Old 16-01-2019, 03:25 PM
SearchingFreedom SearchingFreedom is offline
Newbie ;)
Pathfinder
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 80
 
@WestonG I did not read through all the posts it is to much for me for the moment. Thanks for sharing your pain. My life was also very painful and I was not a "normal" child. I have things in common from indigos but I don't believe I am an indigo my place in the universe is much more special. If I would tell about it nobody, and I mean nobody(!) would believe me. Really nobody.

But if you are interested how God Jesus and reincarnation works together read my new thread in the forum past lifes and reincarnation. The threads name is: "my little experience with the supernatural". So you will understand despite the wrong teachings of church and bible concerning reincarnation and other things, Jesus is God and the way!

Don't ever give up. God can tell you your answers and believe me He can make you suffer but he can delete your tears also!
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  #7  
Old 17-01-2019, 09:08 PM
interim interim is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 17
 
You are just another lost soul on this planet... If you feel "ancient", it's probably because you have come here more recently and you still hold some of your identity... and brain. Don't worry, if you recycle here a dozen of times, you will get dumb down like the rest of the zombies you see around...

When I was younger, I also had a strange dream that something happened with Earth, probably related to the Sun. I was just at my village, in my house, so it was the realistic type of dreams. Something happened outside and we all got out to see it. It was like a huge "storm" that I've never seen before. It was absolutely terrifying. But then we all died and the sky turned red. I felt how I was released from the body, and it turned to be actually the greatest experience I had in my life... It's really possible that we may witness some catastrophic event here, and this is what maybe we came to watch... who knows. Sorry to say, but you will not "save humanity", although this event may be part of restarting it in a some more functional way. I'm trying to determine if we have reached peak idiotism and dysfunctionality, since this may be one clue for a reboot. I can't imagine we are far from it... Humans are really horrific creatures, can't pick a better word, spend more time with animals, they look more intelligent and empathic. But the worse part is that you are also a human, so, super nova sounds like the ultimate solution to me... Although it will be probably just a solar flare combined with the weak magnetic field. This is the so called "killshot" theory. So, here is an advice that I got from someone else, he was just living in a foreign country, but it's the same - just think of life here as a temporal experience, like you are on a vacation. Imagine you can leave that place at any moment, and use the time to experience it while you still can. The problem is that we are brainwashed and we lose perspective here, living feels like eternity... You must somehow break this feeling, it's an illusion. Life here is so fragile, you can literally die tomorrow...

Also try to have some fun here, while you still can. It's hard, I know, it's a dump, and it's especially difficult for someone with IQ above 80. Not sure if it can be of any help, but recently, I got into baking bread. Now I'm trying using sourdough. It's kind of practical science, you work with a particular life form, which is in the core of the life here. If it's legal in your country you can brew also wine/bear/vodka... it's a similar principle. So - find hobbies...

If you want to save something, save a dog, a cat,a pigeon... It seems much more noble to me... and most people will actually agree. Humans like to watch movies, right... And in these moves, they constantly kill each other, no worries. But if they kill a dog, that's when they feel they did something wrong. Nobody wants to watch a dog to die. So... don't feel bad that you don't like humans, even they don't like each other. Really, who likes them... There is nothing wrong with empathy, just wrong target - you need a conscious being. If you are forced to choose between another human and being alone, you are right, being alone is much better.
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  #8  
Old 18-01-2019, 04:43 PM
Gem Gem is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 18,949
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WestonG
Thank you for the replies

Information regarding Star Seeds does seems to resonate with me. Listening to people describe the characteristics or reading up on the subject, gives me chills, goosebumps and my hair stands on end. I feel a rush of energy travelling up my spine. I've always fervently believed in extraterrestrial life. At one time I was obsessed with the star system Zeta Reticuli. Long before I had any knowledge of the concept of Star Seeds. It occurs to me now that the system is a twin star system. And I am a Gemini. Could I have some intrinsic, latent connection to it?

I have great difficulty relaxing and I rarely have the luxury of breathing a sigh of relief. I feel an incredibly strong sense of something ominous and catastrophic approaching. And an equal sense of my needing to fulfil something before that happens. I dream of a star going super nova. I see the cataclysmic energy building and steadily approaching me. I feel I'm on a planet... but I can't say if it's earth or that the star is our sun. It blinds me, all turns to white and then I wake. I always read it as a doomsday prophecy, of sorts. But I wonder now, in hindsight, if it could be a memory of a prior death? I somehow know the answers lie within me. I've always been reluctant to dig too deep. Or even truly embrace any of this. I thought I would simply go insane in my search. Or that this feeling and the influence, or presence was possibly even negative and looking to do me harm.

I have definitely become jaded. I spend a lot of time researching things within human society that horrify me. And inspire me with little hope for the future of humanity. It fatigues and weakens me. I need to anchor myself somehow. I'll continue to research the subject and plan to meditate, to calm myself and perhaps reconnect with whatever energy or presence I once so strongly felt. I feel I've damaged that connection in my melancholic state. I also need to understand how to control empathy. I am overwhelmed with emotion and bombarded with intrusive thoughts when I'm around people. I feel somewhat at peace when I'm alone. Especially in nature. Though I can rarely brave the outside world to enjoy it.

Further advice, opinions or suggestions are most welcome. This is all so new... yet somehow familiar to me.


Well human beings do terrible things, so it's fine to be jaded when people are so self absorbed, inconsiderate and unaware. However, there are truly great people that restore your faith in humanity - and you find one small diamond in the rubble, the rubble no longer matters... and when you look for flowers you discover they are everywhere.
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  #9  
Old 21-01-2019, 04:11 AM
gypsymystique gypsymystique is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 2,316
 
I have heard of some people feeling as you do who find help by having past life regressions. If you can do so, try it with a licensed therapist/counselor.
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  #10  
Old 11-02-2019, 02:19 AM
BelieveInGod BelieveInGod is offline
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Posts: 12
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gem
Well human beings do terrible things, so it's fine to be jaded when people are so self absorbed, inconsiderate and unaware. However, there are truly great people that restore your faith in humanity - and you find one small diamond in the rubble, the rubble no longer matters... and when you look for flowers you discover they are everywhere.

That is a Wonderful perspective, but I don't believe being 'jaded' is ever the answer and I think you agree with the rest of what you've said.

People are indeed selfish, self-consumed and generally and honestly, not much better than the primates we originated from. But there are a few, even if not "star children" or whatever that want to make the world a better place, even at their own expense.

Don't be afraid to expense that. Ever. He should use his hyper-awareness to his advantage and obvious kindness to be the best person he can be.
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