Compassion - A Word that at times gets Lost in the Mix

[Emm]

Many a time I think we use compassion as a means to make ourselves feel better. When we see someone in pain its our natural instinct to want to take that pain away because we are uncomfortable with what we feel as we witness the situation. I don't mean to say that this is in any way selfish but rather an innate understanding that our own energy is being compromised and if so doing will be of little help in the situation. In witnessing the suffering the discomfort we feel is our own energy moving away from its present level of alignment.

I know that when I've felt that state of being compassionate, even though I may not know what to say or how to help there has been something that had taken place within a hug or just being there, as often I'm told they begin to feel better and calmer. It helps if our own energy can remain unruffled by what is taking place, the moment we sink to a level towards the one suffering as in suffering with them, then we are both temporarily lost. But Being present can be beneficial as I believe within the instinctive action taken there is an exchange of and re-balancing of energy. Then both the one who needed the upliftment and the one witnessing can enjoy the feeling of ease and alignment. And as AHB shows you don't even have to be physically present with the one suffering. The energy that is positively directed (as in the releasing of resistance) through thought also helps with alignment...the energy finds its target...we commonly call that prayer :)

The natural benefits of the raising of their energy helps them find answers within themselves for the situation they are in with clearer insight and the strength to follow through. That's how I'm seeing Compassion working and agree with Imzadi that it is about Oneness because what affects one affects all to some degree.

[shivatar]

Originally Posted by baro-san

I may be picky ... but I find true compassion very rare, even among the people that think about themselves as being compassionate. I think that true compassion can't fit in a heart the knows hate. Most "compassionate" people I encountered feel hate for those who disagree with their view.

maybe there are varying degrees of compassion, all equally true. Rather than "true" vs not true.

[shivatar]

oops double posted >_<

Originally Posted by baro-san

I may be picky ... but I find true compassion very rare, even among the people that think about themselves as being compassionate. I think that true compassion can't fit in a heart the knows hate. Most "compassionate" people I encountered feel hate for those who disagree with their view.

Do you feel compassionate towards those people?

[A human Being]

Originally Posted by Imzadi

That is a very interesting take on it in regards to compassion being authentic or inauthentic. I do feel that no amount of compassion is wasted regardless of it being deemed as authentic or otherwise. To have compassion simply means to "suffer with" hence "passion" is suffering and "com" means with. I think it is easier for some to recognize the suffering of others and have empathy for them because they have particularly experienced similar difficulties. For instance, a refugee would find it more natural to develop empathy and compassion for someone else who is fleeing a war torn country etc. Are they merely experiencing a reflection of self pity for themselves or are they utilizing their experience to further enhance the already present human condition of compassion that lies within? Or perhaps they may even experience these two things simultaneously? Maybe instead of thinking about compassion as being either authentic or inauthentic, we can be more open minded. We are each growing at different rates along our journey of life and just because a person has not attained the Cosmic Universal Unconditional Love/Compassion for All That Is type of consciousness does not necessarily deem their compassion to be any less meaningful, palpable, or authentic.

Interesting thoughts, and I do see where you're coming from with regards to recognising the suffering of others who've suffered as you have - I don't think it's necessarily a prerequisite, but it does tend to make it easier. When I talk about compassion being inauthentic, I'm talking about people behaving in a way that conforms to their idea of what compassion is, rather than genuinely feeling compassion - but you know, that might be projection as much as anything, because for most of my life I don't think I really understood the true meaning of the word (largely or wholly because I couldn't feel it for myself).

Anyway I'm rambling, and I'm not really sure what my point is. Just on that last bit in bold - I don't know, for me true compassion is a compassion for all that is, it excludes nothing. I know how that could be hard to understand, though, and I can't really explain right now.

[Imzadi]

Originally Posted by A human Being

Interesting thoughts, and I do see where you're coming from with regards to recognising the suffering of others who've suffered as you have - I don't think it's necessarily a prerequisite, but it does tend to make it easier. When I talk about compassion being inauthentic, I'm talking about people behaving in a way that conforms to their idea of what compassion is, rather than genuinely feeling compassion - but you know, that might be projection as much as anything, because for most of my life I don't think I really understood the true meaning of the word (largely or wholly because I couldn't feel it for myself).

Anyway I'm rambling, and I'm not really sure what my point is. Just on that last bit in bold - I don't know, for me true compassion is a compassion for all that is, it excludes nothing. I know how that could be hard to understand, though, and I can't really explain right now.

You are not rambling at all and I see what you mean to say. Firstly, I think you mean to say inauthentic compassion is like someone who is practicing an image and idea of what they think compassion should be rather than genuinely feeling the connection that comes directly from the heart. So in that sense, you could say some people who volunteers and donates may do it for the sake of practicing compassion because they see it as an image of something good compassionate people should do as oppose to fully capturing the essence of Universal Compassion For All That Is type of consciousness. I would agree with you that there is certainly an unconditional, impersonal, non-attached, no expectation, no demands, type of love and compassion that people embody as they begin to wake up to their own Divine Nature. This is very common as many people begin to become more spiritually awake. Again I see this as a progression. We all start off somewhere until we move to the higher levels of Awareness while recognizing the Oneness that lies in all things and all beings. We become like the Sun indiscriminately shining its Light for all. :)

[naturesflow]

Originally Posted by Emm

Many a time I think we use compassion as a means to make ourselves feel better. When we see someone in pain its our natural instinct to want to take that pain away because we are uncomfortable with what we feel as we witness the situation. I don't mean to say that this is in any way selfish but rather an innate understanding that our own energy is being compromised and if so doing will be of little help in the situation. In witnessing the suffering the discomfort we feel is our own energy moving away from its present level of alignment.

Yes that is true. Everything is connected so when we open to feel our own reactions, recognition of that occurrence/experience we can let go and not infuse ourselves into the other's pain or experience as such. Understanding from a clear presence is more profoundly powerful to another than infusing your own reactions that are feeling their own need to make "right". Compassion with depth of understanding more clear in feeling in yourself, empowers another through their own process for them as they need.

I know that when I've felt that state of being compassionate, even though I may not know what to say or how to help there has been something that had taken place within a hug or just being there, as often I'm told they begin to feel better and calmer. It helps if our own energy can remain unruffled by what is taking place, the moment we sink to a level towards the one suffering as in suffering with them, then we are both temporarily lost. But Being present can be beneficial as I believe within the instinctive action taken there is an exchange of and re-balancing of energy. Then both the one who needed the upliftment and the one witnessing can enjoy the feeling of ease and alignment. And as AHB shows you don't even have to be physically present with the one suffering. The energy that is positively directed (as in the releasing of resistance) through thought also helps with alignment...the energy finds its target...we commonly call that prayer :)

You are on it. This is an entangled response to another rather than a separate awareness of the other as they are and need to be. That immersion into suffering where both are trapped in the painbody, will only create more of what is. It supports for a time, and is beneficial as the needs may be in the shared connection, but ultimately what your saying is how I view compassion. Dig deep in yourself and get clear in feeling as a clear open vessel of compassion, without infusing unnecessary projections of your own needs into the other. I call this empathically present but not projecting into what is more clear compassion aware.

The natural benefits of the raising of their energy helps them find answers within themselves for the situation they are in with clearer insight and the strength to follow through. That's how I'm seeing Compassion working and agree with Imzadi that it is about Oneness because what affects one affects all to some degree.

Yes understand compassion deeper in yourself for your own pain and you naturally can lead from an open state of awareness, not compelled to drown in the pain of others that need to be supported more clear if you can be that person. The world tends to forge connections based upon human needs and needs are often entangled until people realize they no longer need be that way. Supporting others more clear in yourself actually can move them through grief faster, rather than going down and staying down with them keeping them locked in.


I often am very clear now in my own grief and very conscious of others entangled in grief at funerals and other life experiences that affect people deeply. I find myself looking into the current stage of grief as an activation for many in such places to open and let go of their own deeper. Many believe they are sad for the one before them, but many don't realize they are sad for their own grief unresolved and connected to that current experience. In being more clear now with grief myself, (having built a compassionate response to my own deeper core levels of grief) understanding compassion in this light your showing, my presence is listening more clear to the needs of others in their suffering not my own needs in all that. (unless you have entered into your own deeper levels of self grief and sadness to build clarity of being, you will always be triggered to show what you carry within and what still plays out as attachment and entanglement with others )

[lemex]

Compassion without understanding is useless.

[SaturninePluto]

Sympathy- Feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune.

Empathy- the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Apathy- lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.

Clairsentience- The gift of Clairsentience is more psychic or intuitive in nature. Clairsentient’s can feel what other people are feeling and take this into their body, however they can also receive information about the emotion and why it is there.

You asked how we view compassion, I view it in the way I know how.

It isn't sympathy. I do not often pity others.

Pity/ sympathy is insulting to my sensitivities.

I am not empathetic. I do not feel the emotions of others in the same way an empath does.

I am able to feel the emotions of others, but my response is

Apathy. In I do not appear to show an emotional response when others are hurting from emotional pain- grief. I listen and remain silent.

I do feel emotions. But to be honest if someone is crying, I am not necessarily going to cry- the pain I feel is inside. It is debilitating. Immobilizing and deeply felt. It is tiring.

How I view compassion is a level of empathy- with the ability to step back with a level of indifference- not to mirror back pain.

How I show compassion is to listen with patience and understanding.

I often feel guilty as I am at a loss of how to help an individual the most I can do is let them speak and get it out, and hope they realize I am in pain, but can not do anything for their pain. I can be there. I can listen, but they will have to take full responsibility for their own healing.

I am only human. I can not possibly solve everything.

My compassion is viewed as a deep sense of pain I feel for others, but which I remain silent about.

[A human Being]

What a great thread I thought Emm and naturesflow in particular made some excellent points.

Originally Posted by Imzadi

You are not rambling at all and I see what you mean to say. Firstly, I think you mean to say inauthentic compassion is like someone who is practicing an image and idea of what they think compassion should be rather than genuinely feeling the connection that comes directly from the heart. So in that sense, you could say some people who volunteers and donates may do it for the sake of practicing compassion because they see it as an image of something good compassionate people should do as oppose to fully capturing the essence of Universal Compassion For All That Is type of consciousness. I would agree with you that there is certainly an unconditional, impersonal, non-attached, no expectation, no demands, type of love and compassion that people embody as they begin to wake up to their own Divine Nature. This is very common as many people begin to become more spiritually awake. Again I see this as a progression. We all start off somewhere until we move to the higher levels of Awareness while recognizing the Oneness that lies in all things and all beings. We become like the Sun indiscriminately shining its Light for all. :)

Yeah exactly, from a young age we're told how we should and shouldn't behave and for many of us the tendency is to try to conform to those ideas, out of a sense of guilt, duty, or egoic aggrandisement - so we're very often led by our heads and not by our hearts, even when we're engaging in what seems like a laudable activity such as charity work, as you say. But after a while that can start to feel hollow and meaningless, and it can cause you to question why you're even doing it in the first place... maybe it leads to the realisation that, whilst you thought you were motivated by the desire to alleviate the suffering of others, maybe what you were actually doing was unconsciously running from your own suffering.

So as others have alluded to, I think the question is, How exactly am I relating to the suffering of another? Am I viewing it as a problem, am I trying to fix it somehow, make it go away? Or am I completely open to it and accepting of it - am I an empty vessel, as naturesflow said? The more open you are, the higher the level of your awareness, I think :)