Not Wanting to Come Into a Life

[CosmicWonder]

Originally Posted by Nightdancer

Hi Lynn. I don't know you or your life and I don't want to make assumptions. It sounds like to me that you could have used more rest time before incarnating. Maybe I'm wrong. My view is that our reincarnation system is changing. It makes sense that your personal freedom was overlooked given the time frame of birth. That is of course something that shouldn't be done at least in my view. However at the same time we were facing global issues where personal freedom wasn't the most attended to. Whether it was malicious intent to bring you into life before you were rested and ready for it or how things would fit together better in someone else's view whether it was large scale or smaller personal freedom sounds like it was overlooked. I don't think it should be overlooked. Individuals know the way that is right for them which is what works best for the larger as well. Overshadowing it with force is a dysfunction. I believe the reincarnation system though is under great change so incarnating when you want ought to be more of a thing. I have some limited experience with incarnation. What I reported in a moment of clarity that I wanted to tell myself about the topic was my life was very much wanted and I had a lot of work to do at my birth arranging things so it would work out later. I can see what you are talking about that and I feel that it will be possible to incarnate much more freely in the future. I don't know anything though and what changes there are in the spirit world as time progresses I don't know but it is swiftly changing in general so. Best wishes.

I find this idea really interesting... have walked around with the idea that the other side is capable of change too for a while

[feather]

Hi Lynn,

According to doctors, I was not supposed to be born. After my sister was born, my mom's tubes were gashed, tied and sewn into her uterus. After a couple of years, my mom knew she was pregnant again but her doctor wouldn't accept it at first. As the pregnancy progressed and he could no longer deny it, he said that she would naturally abort - she didn't. When it was obvious that I was developing, she was told that I would be very damaged and the pregnancy would not result in a live birth. My mom delivered me via c-section and died for a few minutes. They brought her back and I was declared "normal." As a child, I was anything but and relatives believed that the "normal" diagnosis was a bit hasty. I was very withdrawn, didn't speak til I was four years old and seemed only content when I was in nature with animals. What I think happened was that I had written a very ambitious life script and the closer I came to entering this world, the more anxious I became. I believed this life would be wrought with pain, sadness and huge challenges and hurdles and wasn't convinced I was prepared to play it out. My essence convinced me that I needed to. I've never felt comfortable here but have tried to understand the lessons I knew I needed to work on. There are times when I feel like I've made progress and other times when I feel like I've been so totally inept. I keep trying to be mindful and soulful. I'm an HSP and have always felt overwhelmed by my emotions and life in general. I have no idea if I've been very successful in fulfilling my life script and probably won't til I leave her and can do an honest accessment.

Blessings to you, feather

[CosmicWonder]

Originally Posted by feather

Hi Lynn,

According to doctors, I was not supposed to be born. After my sister was born, my mom's tubes were gashed, tied and sewn into her uterus. After a couple of years, my mom knew she was pregnant again but her doctor wouldn't accept it at first. As the pregnancy progressed and he could no longer deny it, he said that she would naturally abort - she didn't. When it was obvious that I was developing, she was told that I would be very damaged and the pregnancy would not result in a live birth. My mom delivered me via c-section and died for a few minutes. They brought her back and I was declared "normal." As a child, I was anything but and relatives believed that the "normal" diagnosis was a bit hasty. I was very withdrawn, didn't speak til I was four years old and seemed only content when I was in nature with animals. What I think happened was that I had written a very ambitious life script and the closer I came to entering this world, the more anxious I became. I believed this life would be wrought with pain, sadness and huge challenges and hurdles and wasn't convinced I was prepared to play it out. My essence convinced me that I needed to. I've never felt comfortable here but have tried to understand the lessons I knew I needed to work on. There are times when I feel like I've made progress and other times when I feel like I've been so totally inept. I keep trying to be mindful and soulful. I'm an HSP and have always felt overwhelmed by my emotions and life in general. I have no idea if I've been very successful in fulfilling my life script and probably won't til I leave her and can do an honest accessment.

Blessings to you, feather

It’s actually really strong of you i believe. Maybe it was to ambitious. Or maybe the lessons you’re learning aren’t about succes. I believed things were about “succes” until a year or so ago. Everything turned when I came to so I had really internally changed just due to the hardships I went through.

I wish you the best. Goodluck om your journey. I hope you find a little relieve. Blessings.

Hi Lynne.. I can't add an answer to your question except to say that i never connected to either my mother or my father... And I don't know why. But that's life I suppose! Your story is heartwarming. The fact that you are happy now, with no regrets about birth , is all that matters. There have been many ugly times within society over time, all of which did need to be addressed...and within reason have been.... Blessings .

[Native spirit]

I totally get where you are coming from as I didn't want to be born either I fought against it all the way
as I was about to be born my brother drowned he was 4. it stopped my mother giving birth to me.
as soon as I was able to speak I asked my grandmother why I was living in this family.
I was forever asking if I was adopted. as I was treated so differently from my siblings.
my mother hated me as the feeling was mutual.
they couldn't accept me because I was so different. I could do what they couldn't. I ran away from home age 10.
I went to live with my grandmother, she taught me a lot about how I was feeling knowing I was living in the wrong family and country.
I was not a happy child. I just didn't want to be here.
the happiest time in my life was with my husband and my in laws were great. then he died aged 44.
I have my kids but I know I walk my final path now. and I wont be back anymore

Namaste

[Ewwerrin]

Originally Posted by Native spirit

I totally get where you are coming from as I didn't want to be born either I fought against it all the way
as I was about to be born my brother drowned he was 4. it stopped my mother giving birth to me.
as soon as I was able to speak I asked my grandmother why I was living in this family.
I was forever asking if I was adopted. as I was treated so differently from my siblings.
my mother hated me as the feeling was mutual.
they couldn't accept me because I was so different. I could do what they couldn't. I ran away from home age 10.
I went to live with my grandmother, she taught me a lot about how I was feeling knowing I was living in the wrong family and country.
I was not a happy child. I just didn't want to be here.
the happiest time in my life was with my husband and my in laws were great. then he died aged 44.
I have my kids but I know I walk my final path now. and I wont be back anymore

Namaste

May I ask where you rather want to be. Or where you plan on going.

Originally Posted by Native spirit

I totally get where you are coming from as I didn't want to be born either I fought against it all the way
as I was about to be born my brother drowned he was 4. it stopped my mother giving birth to me.
as soon as I was able to speak I asked my grandmother why I was living in this family.
I was forever asking if I was adopted. as I was treated so differently from my siblings.
my mother hated me as the feeling was mutual.
they couldn't accept me because I was so different. I could do what they couldn't. I ran away from home age 10.
I went to live with my grandmother, she taught me a lot about how I was feeling knowing I was living in the wrong family and country.
I was not a happy child. I just didn't want to be here.
the happiest time in my life was with my husband and my in laws were great. then he died aged 44.
I have my kids but I know I walk my final path now. and I wont be back anymore

Namaste

Oh my lord. I am just so so sorry for everything you have been through, felt , experienced, and lived. I am shedding tears for your journey and can understand completely why you say you won't be back. No- one should question this..it is obvious why. I applaud your strength.

[feather]

Thank you for responding and for your well wishes realizefun. Success to me is to strive to be the best version of myself spiritually that I can be. Major focuses are being sensitive to others, do no harm, being respectful, mindful and gratitude.

You said "I still feel like the reason why I had to live this life is evil." What does that mean?

many blessings to you on your journey - be kind to you

[Ewwerrin]

I guess my life wasn't that easy either.
Yet it was way easier than my parents their life.
That is why parents have often been the source of resistance.
But they do not exist to become you.
They merely exist, that you may not become like them.
And when they have succeeded, they will become way more unto themselves aswell.
Because it will be known, that there is only one source, for every single creation.
And sex is just a pleasurable cough of this realisation.
Tho love is its true unification.

[aimtobe]

I too had birth complications. Two weeks after my due date (when doctors predicted my birth), I finally decided to come out... but tried to choke myself first. I was one of the "blue babies" because the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck, which prevented my ability to get oxygen. It was a stressful and laborious day of contractions and pushing before they decided to do an emergency C section just as the new date rolled over (after midnight) to birth me into a date full of 7s, including a birth weight of 7 pounds. *scratches head*

When I was young, I too questioned either my adoption or my brother's adoption. So, I resonate with that behavior as well.

I also have a weird relationship with my mom. After reading the book Journey of Souls by Michael Newton, I have come to think I might have purposely incarnating with my mom for a reason. Still discovering that though.

Previously I read a different post from Native Spirit and it really resonated with me, so I think I was not happy about entering this life as well... especially since most of my life I have not wanted to be here. I am working on changing my perspective though. (For some reason, I have it in my mind that if I accomplish some things - like enjoying this life - then I get closer to not coming back. Go figure!)

Okay, enough said about me. I have a question now.

So, it is possible to surmise that if you had birth complications then that means you didn't want to come into this life?

I heard that babies born during a time period (which probably includes most of us), came purposely during this time to help Earth go through these hard times.