Extremely strange but can you answer it?

Hi, when i was around 9 years old there was a brutal murder which appeared on the news about a transgender man who was brutal killed and thrown into the sea, for a long time i couldn't get his face out of my head and i constantly used to cry about him i think it was my first real experience of feeling or seeing pain, i used to imagine him on the beach constantly and feeling his pain, i'd say i thought about him for atleast 4 months sometimes every day.
Im now 22 and i thought about him again today for the first time in years and ive tried every means of searching his murder online and i cannot find it? i feel i need to find out what happened to him and if his murderer was ever caught? i dont want to have contact with him spiritually as i dont feel i am ready for that, i just need closure to know what happened can anyone enlighten me on why on earth this has cropped up again and why i am feeling this way? i feel as if im going mad? i never knew him but i have started thinking about him again is this normal?

[Tobi]

You could check in archive copies of local newspapers? It's possible libraries still have these on microfilm (well they used to, but their archives may be digital now) You could ask at your local library about it?

[Native spirit]

As children we are like sponges we take in everything,some things stay with us others dont,i remember when i was about 10 a friends brother was playing with another peron i know. the friends brother was killed outright he was hit by a car. some other friend who werent there but knew him had dreams about him where he was shouting for help they were really upset for a good while. as i see spirit anyway i used to walk along where he was killed and ask him to show himself to me i did see him once.
he looked just like he used to look no different.as for the man who was in the water he would have passed over.and he will be fine .

Namaste

A suggestion would be to pray about it to your "God" (only if you practice prayer) and ask for divine intervention to help him cross over if he hasn't already. You don't have to deal with ghosts/spirit communication let the people upstairs deal with it. Maybe once he has crossed over, you'll feel more at peace with the situation.

For you to react the way you did and to still think about him even now, it seems like maybe he might have been a past-life connection. I think those can affect you even if you never knew them.

Would you say you react to most murders you hear about in the media in a similar fashion?

You sound like a sensative person, being so young at the time it made an impression on you, I've had an aversion to violence for as long as I can remember. I'm sure by now he's entered the light. The suggestions given here to try to look it up might ease your mind.

[Dragonfly1]

You have a kind gentle heart and you were exposed to a tragedy that touched your being, your empathy and kindness would have been like a salve to him..
Even though your physical years were young, your soul is/was not and it showed through your empathy toward his sad lonely passing.....perhaps your recent memory of it was an anniversary of that passing.....he may be a member of your soul group, and his passing and what you felt may have been a lesson for you in caring and compassion......who knows the wonders of the place we call 'home' and all the intricacies of the gifts of learning that are presented to us always while we are here.......many blessings to you...

I have a similar experience and like you in later years I tried to find out what had happened but could not remember enough details to find it in the archive
When I was about 9 there were report on tv of a young boy who had run away from home I would think about him everyday as a child myself and wonder how it must feel to be out there alone free in the wilderness "I was a bit of a tomboy and loved the thought of roughy it" anyway a time passed and it turn out that his father had killed him and buried him under a pond in their back garden i think i was devestated and all through my life i have had times when i rember him which is unsuel as i have little other memories from that time
I believe it when i woke up to the crulty of this world