Indistinctive Poetry bubble from me.

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

I'm counting each breath I learn how to take.
It seems like they freeze right in front of my face.
Harden there like a mask to constrict my flow
Form into a shell of me until we are standing toe to toe.

My efforts, my words which have come to define me
Standing here in front, now surely looking to confine me.
Shes such a beautiful girl, I don't know why she'd defy me.
But just because she looks like me doesn't really imply me.

I had this dream the other night, standing by a mirror
I thought i caught a glimpse of some one, but then it got clearer.
It was me all coked up skinny and sad
begging for a fix but i said to bad.
She was therein the flesh not a reflection anymore
Begging and pleading picking at sores.
I couldn't take it so i shoved her to the floor.
I could beat her down, but i reach for the door.

She started to scream "but it feels so good i need it now"
I turned and ran looking for a way out.
Its my child hood home, kitchen and sink
The smell of the dead causes it to stink.
A past that haunts me, more than any ghost.
A past that has claimed my mind as its host.

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Secretly I have stored things
and you will never see them
never break them
never free them
never take them.

They are mine and you wont hate them.

Secretly I am so many things
That you have never known

Not known me like a father knows his daughter
Or a lover knows her bed.

You dont know what causes me to falter
Or what lays inside my head.

You dont know the panging of my stomach
the growls would raise the dead.

You dont know me

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Sweet romance and the glitter around her eyes
You want to love her, but when you touch her she dies.
You want to need her but she seems in a distant paradise
You can't control her and she can't control her eyes.

Honey scented and quite insecure
She will definately lean on you
Thats for sure

She will hold your hand and follow you
through this life

She would even be your wife.

But that sweet romance and the glitter in her eyes
Its her hopes and dreams she thinks while she dies
Its her old age because she doesnt think heaven will be nice
Its her closed off self and her sultry eyes

You want to love her, but at what price
Dont try to shove her,

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Splintered bones and Feathers

Lay in the pit of my stomach.

Feline I am prowling deep in the jungle.

Call me eve, I am the beggining
and I will be the end.

I will birth this light and destroy it.

I will limit what I create.
I will nestle it so tightly

it will suffocate slowly.
The whole time thinking of

How warm it is in mothers arms.

It wont even realize its dying...

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Oh, you have such a pretty brain
So shine and grey so shine and grey
Such pink spindles of sweet knowing flesh
such beautiful swirls of mother knows best.

You make me insane
So shy to day so shy today
How you move me across all borders
how you cut life into perfect quarters.

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Damaged goods is an understatement
I wanted you to rape me
And when i saw the pain in your eyes
I wanted to sedate me.
Your no masochist
but i was mental twist
ooh
I find it hard to live,
ohh
I find it hard to kiss.

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Tame this tongue
to long to run
I catch my phrases
a beat to short.
And when they blast
the feeling lasts.
I've given you support.
Don't be fooled
nor ridiculed
I'm not into to soothing says.
Would you rather me lie
when there's no food left
and you couldn't eat for days?

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

Your rolling waves of physical effort
The smell of the breath from your nose.
The sounds and sighs you quietly make
With in my head a symphony compose.

Blue tee shirts and Egyptian after shave
Books on spirituality and success
A thousand ideas for free energy
a man who some how thinks hes less.

A soft voice with a strong scream
a Rock Star, singing, guitar playing fool
A guru in healing and friend in life
A kiss on the cheek and a drink by the pool

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

picture
this room, this house
My pants and blouse
all of which have come
to define me.

[MaryMagdaQueenofQueens]

I feel so insecure,
yet I
feel so self assured
and I
Want you to hear me,
but I
never say a word
and I'm
so overly bored
of being a wall flower
that I
think its absurd
but I
Wanna Take Just a Little Bit of Power

Give me anything, I want to feel a rush
and Tell me anything, I want to feel you push
for just a little self control
like maybe things aren't always,
So predictable.

Like maybe you don't know me...
And probably, could show me
Just a few new things about you.
Like I dont know you
Cause I know there's something
that you never want to give
and I want to have it cause
Its the only thing that makes me live....
I need some sense of connection, I need some type of confection
some simmered down potent batch
some hate from you and love to match
some night in bed we wont forget
Some song in your head you just can't get..

And we both,
oh we both need it so bad
yes we both
will go to sleep so sad
if the lights stop,
if the nights stop,
we just can't take it
if the nightmares stop.
give me some sense of addiction