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19-04-2016, 05:45 PM
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Knower
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 121
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How do men experience soul connections
Need men's povs please lol
It seems like my tf isn't too aware of his feelings but at the same time is sorta controlled by them. Like he acts out and does stuff but gives a blank when it comes to anything involving recognizing feelings of the moment esp the subtler ones. I guess also gotta consider that he's not awake yet. For me it was the longing and instant recognition of similarities at a very deep level. It's like he says he doesn't feel stuff but he sure is good at acting out
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19-04-2016, 06:24 PM
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Master
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,668
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Obviously one can only speak form their experience, I'm not sure there is one generic "man's perspective." I was always a sensitive male, I've been all about honoring the female since the age of about 7, it honestly started that early for me. But my unconscious life still had to play out. I hurt people in my 20's, that was a pretty unconscious time for me. I started getting it together in my 30's. It was in my 40's that my fully-conscious self came into being.
In one relationship I didn't love the person, and was too cowardly to get out of it for several reasons. So that was one reason I hurt the person: I wasn't thoughtful and considerate because I didn't love them.
In the other long relationship I had, I cared for the person, but they were always putting stuff on me: what I was doing and who I was, wasn't enough. And I'm going to tell you how extreme and ridiculous that got: by the end of the relationship, I was the one working, and paying the mortgage and all the bills, and doing all the cooking and housework, and STILL she left on a moment's notice without telling me a thing. I came home and her bags were packed, she was moving to another city and had already rented a place! And I'm not a bad person, I'm happy in life. There was just nothing I could do to please her apparently.
I will say this though: the burden of never being enough, yet still having to do and be everything, had turned to resentment. And that resentment manifested as lack of interest in being close to the person. In that case I was hurt more than just disinterested. But the result was the same.
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23-04-2016, 10:02 PM
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Master
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: outside the illusion
Posts: 1,493
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baile
Obviously one can only speak form their experience, I'm not sure there is one generic "man's perspective." I was always a sensitive male, I've been all about honoring the female since the age of about 7, it honestly started that early for me. But my unconscious life still had to play out. I hurt people in my 20's, that was a pretty unconscious time for me. I started getting it together in my 30's. It was in my 40's that my fully-conscious self came into being.
In one relationship I didn't love the person, and was too cowardly to get out of it for several reasons. So that was one reason I hurt the person: I wasn't thoughtful and considerate because I didn't love them.
In the other long relationship I had, I cared for the person, but they were always putting stuff on me: what I was doing and who I was, wasn't enough. And I'm going to tell you how extreme and ridiculous that got: by the end of the relationship, I was the one working, and paying the mortgage and all the bills, and doing all the cooking and housework, and STILL she left on a moment's notice without telling me a thing. I came home and her bags were packed, she was moving to another city and had already rented a place! And I'm not a bad person, I'm happy in life. There was just nothing I could do to please her apparently.
I will say this though: the burden of never being enough, yet still having to do and be everything, had turned to resentment. And that resentment manifested as lack of interest in being close to the person. In that case I was hurt more than just disinterested. But the result was the same.
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I found this interesting. Your first long term relationship you were the one who was not considerate because you weren't in love, the second it seems you experienced the opposite role.
Truth is no one can ever BE enough until we learn to identify what true love and connection is. Not obligation or love without connection. Both are needed then no matter who they are they are enough, and Each getting their needs met seeks to give/be even more for each other. Glad third time was the charm.
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24-04-2016, 02:56 AM
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Deactivated Account
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 837
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Codependency
Baile, please do not feel attacked, picked on or examined but this is what I see in you post...........
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baile
Obviously one can only speak form their experience, I'm not sure there is one generic "man's perspective." I was always a sensitive male, I've been all about honoring the female since the age of about 7, it honestly started that early for me. But my unconscious life still had to play out.
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Exactly what is "my unconscious life"? IMO, you are speaking of your unremembered or even unresolved past from early childhood.
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I hurt people in my 20's, that was a pretty unconscious time for me.
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For me, that period of my life was mostly about bad childhood programing that unwittingly and unconsciously emerged and hurt others.
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I started getting it together in my 30's. It was in my 40's that my fully-conscious self came into being.
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Cool! I'm still waiting to become fully conscious. Congratulations!
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In one relationship I didn't love the person, and was too cowardly to get out of it for several reasons.
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Same here. I stayed because I was afraid to be alone or take charge of my own life so I tried to live like her house pet!
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So that was one reason I hurt the person: I wasn't thoughtful and considerate because I didn't love them.
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For me, it wasn't a lack of love but more a lack of self esteem and courage which I often believed was love and loyalty but not really!
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In the other long relationship I had, I cared for the person, but they were always putting stuff on me: what I was doing and who I was, wasn't enough.
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My 1st, failed marriage was kind of like that too. I was her little, codependent door mat. I'm surprised your "fully-conscious self" allowed you to take it.
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And I'm going to tell you how extreme and ridiculous that got: by the end of the relationship, I was the one working, and paying the mortgage and all the bills, and doing all the cooking and housework, and STILL she left on a moment's notice without telling me a thing. I came home and her bags were packed, she was moving to another city and had already rented a place!
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Whew, that sounds like a Codependent trap where you were the Dependent one and she (the other Codependent) used you as long as possible and then LEFT YOU. That's pretty much how Codependency works and one or both Codependents usually gets hurt.
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And I'm not a bad person, I'm happy in life. There was just nothing I could do to please her apparently.
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Codependent's can NEVER be pleased because they all carry early childhood, emotional damages that leave both of them extremely needy and desperate USERS.
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I will say this though: the burden of never being enough, yet still having to do and be everything, had turned to resentment. And that resentment manifested as lack of interest in being close to the person. In that case I was hurt more than just disinterested. But the result was the same.
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Codependency hurts everyone caught up in it. I had to learn some very harsh lessons about Codependency in my 1st marriage but my now marriage is OK, thanks to therapy.
__________________
These are JUST MY OPINIONS!
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07-05-2016, 05:35 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 448
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19-04-2016, 06:56 PM
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Knower
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Holland
Posts: 146
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Robot
Need men's povs please lol
It seems like my tf isn't too aware of his feelings but at the same time is sorta controlled by them. Like he acts out and does stuff but gives a blank when it comes to anything involving recognizing feelings of the moment esp the subtler ones. I guess also gotta consider that he's not awake yet. For me it was the longing and instant recognition of similarities at a very deep level. It's like he says he doesn't feel stuff but he sure is good at acting out
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Well Robot,
I’m speaking from experience when twin flames meet there is an connection that no one can deny ik comes from deep in your soul. When one twin is awake it is his or her mission to wake the other one up. Before I met my twin I was working for years to awaken and the drive to grow spiritually was so powerful that I changed everything in my life to try to awaken. It was after meeting my twin and spending time with her that my heart chakra opened and because of that I have grown in the last months more than in the 20 years of preparing for this meeting (not Knowing) it was coming. She was just through a dark night of the soul when a couple years later started receiving energy healing and when she showed up at my work as a colleague, We made statements like I know you we are 21 years apart from age and she wanted to know how I awakened. We would talk about mediation, yoga changing to healthier food and drinking water or tea. Making affirmations and everything that I had already changed. She took up the same things and she has grown so spiritually the last 3 years. It was just after my heart opened that we realized we were twins we have so much unconditional love for each other and we are both working as light workers ( our light is so bright when we send out the same intentions). Any way back to my story the awaken twin should try to help the other to awaken then that is when the real magic happens. We are here for a mission the mission could very well be just to love each other and bring that light to this world.
Joe
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19-04-2016, 07:08 PM
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Master
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Guadalajara, México
Posts: 1,942
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Intense feelings/emotions, wanting to protect the other person, and thinking all day about this person.
__________________
"Do not pity the dead Harry. Pity the living and above all those who live without Love"
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19-04-2016, 08:23 PM
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Pathfinder
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 58
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucyan28
Intense feelings/emotions, wanting to protect the other person, and thinking all day about this person.
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All the above and in my case, its like I am apart of her life and her.. I can feel
every emotion she goes through.
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08-05-2016, 12:04 AM
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Pathfinder
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 56
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucyan28
Intense feelings/emotions, wanting to protect the other person, and thinking all day about this person.
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I don't know what to write.
Beautiful post.
<3
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19-04-2016, 07:13 PM
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Knower
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 121
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I wouldn't say disinterest as much as i think my tf has shut out feelings at some levels but they definitely show in the way he acts. and yea he's been hurt before. Thanks guys.
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