Sprit flame from Allah's Paradise

[Noodlee]

there is more than meets the eye i see the soul that is inside (avril lavigne - sk8er boy)

[Noodlee]

I just realized some people have it bad and some people have it good, i was in the middle of this.
I got popularity granted just by my last name and my skin lighted and people were happy everywhere i went, it was like i could choose any girl because they would stand out or feel anxiety,

youtube.com /watch?v=LOZuxwVk7TU

its like i was this boy from paradise i could walk into a disco and kiss the first girl and she would always kiss me back.

People liked me on both sides of popularity i was like the observer watching the weather etc.

Its not to put more self worth on me, its just today i even get money for nothing, just by doing good deeds with the money, Its like i am rich with no money.

Now i get all this spirituality granted and wth? i look at skill and honestly i understand today that people work to get popularity and acceptance etc etc.

This has been hard for me to understand in my teenage years.

I understand today that some people actually have it dark, its not just in their voice or this tiny feeling. They actually have it bad or good.

you have to realize that i come from a childhood with domestic violence and had to accept foster parents that lived 15 km from my school, that peace when you saw your 4 year old brother getting baby bottle from a not real parent made me very strong.
I'm strong because i had 2 families, my foster parents that lived on a beautiful new made farm with hunting etc. And i can account for the fact that social heritage only makes you stronger you wont fall into the same patterns your parents did. You learn your whole life. So in my teenage years i was glowing and people were grounded and on everywhere i went, my lil brother also got popular just from our last name by being half american (my dad is from Death valley cali)
Anyways i hope you understand that when i was at the mental hospital i only wanted to help other people, but its very hard to help other mentally challenged people with their husband had died from cancer. But i played my part.
i strongly suggest that if you have it really bad you can get help and actually learn from it. You can help other people on the bottom and you can play with your thoughts in front of a audience (called the staff) You can let yourself be yourself

So keep it real and be happy :)=

I am strong in the senses. My mind is at peace. I love life ("I" "L"ove "L"ife) Ill?

I might be very <ill> but it wont be forever, when i feel the surroundings and weather and feel alone my whole wholeness will be at peace again., When i can charge up. Because i just "know" These doctors and nurses they know that they know that they know that they know etc.
But i sacrificed my old life for the years i spend at the mental hospital, It really is like my old life is waiting do you know that feel? that people in your life is actually waiting for you to come back home. And when you feel a spark for it you will go with it.
Just know in the heart that you can find the sun and find the love and find the peace and that you are pure inside. Thanks love peace harmony and!cause

[Noodlee]

I wanna end this thread with
youtube.com /watch?v=YrhYhI3L32c
Now realize
The stars they die
Darkness has fallen in paradise
But we'll be strong
And we will fight
Against the creatures of the night
Im just a kid and its just for fun some of it

youtube.com /watch?v=fKrYdb1JaBM
The world is full of magic, can't you see
I'm your guardian angel, trust in me
So many times I've been watching you
And now I fell in love with you!
Do your heart, feel so lonely
Think about your sweetest dream
Close your eyes, and follow me
And I'll take you to my destiny
I will show you the world

I am both Cannot choose

I know im crazy, but im also joking a bit And its not for real.

[Noodlee]

youtube.com /watch?v=G8nlmmnYY-A

Okay no more Honorable (vulnerable)

youtube.com /watch?v=lImm2mpVfrg

Just listen
Save your self

Ohhh what i have been through in this mental hospital amazing meeting real life shadow priests, Killah priest praying take showers in ointment, stars, immortality, the place of power No aggresion no anxiety

[Noodlee]

Im finally seeing sadness and happiness in other peoples eyes again, i can start to build eye sympathy especially on videos where i see famous people having sad eyes i finally feel sincerity again i can finally look at people with sympathy because i see that they are sad in the eyes or build love because i see people happy in the eyes

I finally see others peoples mistakes in their faces or sickness of skin etc. AS i used to before the mental hospital i feel sympathy for the older generation again, they look old young people look young

i feel human

i can finally give again instead of recieving

But also seeing hopelessness or eccentric is very important to me to see in other's eyes, im not afraid to see other's emotions like i used to before the mental house i think i must have hid it to be able to help the other mentally ill in the closed

finally finally finally This i could not say to my doctor.

I can finally see on the skin of people that they are not so clean, i finally see mistakes :O

I can finally see the socket is drained on the skin under others eyes :O

As i used to ty

I dont know why, but i create my own emotion.

This will make me be able to charge up my emotions and have excess to other people even famous people or animals.

i think my experience was so that i can show my real higher self emotions, of being totally drained from anxiety and everything, to show my real face without anxiety or fear etc.
And that's beautiful,

You have no idea what i have been through, my hair is golden striped blonde i mean..

You have no idea how hard it was to read other peoples emotions just blank emotions in other people with them trying to read my cognitive movements xD just this blank serious stare at me for so many years. And finally it might be over!

cause in all essence we are all "just" human. wich is a good thing.

I actually feel like my eyes are charging up while being awake and sitting and playing world of warcraft i have not felt this for years

[Noodlee]

i have no idea why i wanted to drain myself for years only to rebuild all feelings again and have stronger emotions than before.