Miss H, Hahaha!
It's like I was saying to Baile on the other thread.
Forgiveness of others is a critical watershed on our journey, so that we can love others and then finally ourselves more truly and more deeply.
And without letting go of the hatred toward others and forgiving and accepting them, we cannot fully forgive, accept, and love ourselves.
This is particularly relevant and most needed for those who have perpetrated harm or even death on others...their burden of resentment and hatred is often the greatest and so they most of all need to forgive those they have harmed or killed for whatever they have blamed their victims (term used for clarity) for doing or being. They need to forgive the victims for whatever drove them to harm or kill the victims.
They need to forgive their victims, in order to then own their actions and realise it was only ever they who took the decision to harm or kill. Only then can they seek forgiveness and reconciliation -- including forgiving themselves for whatever they did, and learning to love and accept themselves in that same spirit of forgiveness. Seeking reconciliation is the other part of it, if the victim is alive. A hard heart is a real and substantial spiritual obstacle for many who have done great harm to others...and at this place of awareness on their journey, forgiveness of others broadens and deepens the heart, healing it...and thus shows the way to healing and authentic love.
But, it's all relative to where you are on your journey.
If you are in the crib and the pram because you've yet to walk, then you need those things.
They are vital to you at that stage in your development.
Then once you've learnt to walk, you no longer need those things and nor will you (God willing) ever again...if so, it is likely just temporary.
As you've come to a different place entirely and you are transformed.
A toddler is a different creature in many ways than an infant (in that analogy), and then again an adult is again something different, you know?
I think forgiveness of others is necessary to own our stuff and then to forgive ourselves...basically, to come to love others and self more truly and more deeply. To broaden the heart. It's the key to the gateway. Forgive, love better, broaden and deepen the heart, and then pass through the gateway.
Only to find yourself radically transformed and in a different place entirely
Nothing is ever the end...always, always it is (in) the beginning.
Peace & blessings
7L