Just wanted to share this because i never have with anyone, and its one of those strange moments that stuck with me. Maybe it will impact someone for the better or even prevent a(nother) tragedy
It was a dark time when i felt trapped by parents and school bullying. (This school recently made WORLDWIDE headlines after a suicide). U likely know the persons name but i wont say now. One day in particular i finally had it all planned out, if i didnt do it i woulda ran away. I had my belongings and as much cash i could get. As i was on my way i expected many calls from people wondering where i was, but NOBODY called. (Remember that fact). That was likely the saviour, i probably just wanted the attention but never got it. I think if my phone was blowing up i woulda felt even more trapped and went through with it. I trekked it through pouring rain, out of the city and onto some train tracks attempting to reach a major bridge. But confusing highways had me take a wrong turn. If i had reached that bridge i may have jumped or crossed it to run away forever.
Anyways, having no clue where i was, pouring rain, slpashed and honked at by semi trucks driving by, it was surreal. I was defeated. Clearly must have looked out of place because a cop car eventually picked me up. Told them a ** story, they thought i was on drugs but showed no side effects.
Heres the kicker... I later found out that my phone wasnt even working. For some inexplicable reason my phone plan had been completly cancelled. Years later, thinking back i thought maybe i did it in many other realities or previous lives so the energy just transferred over which for some reason had someone cancel my phone. But i now know someone was watching over me. The phone cancellation remains a miracle.
I still dont know my major purpose other than affecting lives around me in small ways. But every dark or sad day, i think about that fateful day. I know theres more and hopefully the darkest days r behind me.
Keep your head up. Theres more than we know
Suicide attempt
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