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25-03-2014, 08:16 PM
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Where Do i Go?
I have no idea where to put this:
I'm trying to break down all my walls and let the world in.
I just have no idea of how to do so.
Do I meditate? If so which type of practices?
I'd appreciate your feedback.
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25-03-2014, 08:23 PM
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Hi, me again
The walls you talk about, are these fears? anxieties? oppressions?
Sure meditate, there are plenty of threads on meditation in the meditation section of the forum. But you need to work out what it is you want to achieve from letting the world in?
What is it you hope to gain from learning about yourself?
Do you want to feel differently? act differently?
You are your own creator, you can attract as much or as little in to your life.
So what it it you wish to change?
NJ
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25-03-2014, 08:30 PM
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Well, fears yes. Plenty of fears.
i feel I have to wear a mask in order to feel and act confident. Whenever I feel scared, I act the opposite. I don't let myself feel the <negative> feelings.
Apparently, I'm supposed to feel all of these feelings because it is a progression of growth.
I mean, I'm so afraid, I wont let people in. I mean, I love people as a whole. Almost obsessively so, but no individual as of yet. I just don't trust very easily.
I've seen and studied relationships. Some of them fall by the wayside. Some don't make it. Some are lasting and beautiful. But I'm too afraid to even try. I think i've got up the courage, then I spook at the last minute and change the subject. And I guess I'm afraid to risk my heart at something that could hurt it.
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25-03-2014, 08:38 PM
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Something I like to quote a lot is
Nobody can make you feel anything, unless you allow them to.
The only way you can get hurt, is if you allow yourself to get hurt, and the only way you are going to get hurt is by not taking a risk.
It sounds as though you need to begin with looking at your thoughts, you dont allow the negative feelings, but you mask them so they are still there really. So next time you feel a negative or think a negative, try seeing the positive of the situation.
I speak from someone with a social anxiety disorder, so I know what it feels like. But I also now know what all the positive feelings feel like, and they far out way the negative, and even the negative have a positive
Perhaps set yourself a task each week, to take notice of when you are feeling scared, vulnerable afraid and think okay, but what could be the positive?
and take the risk, if you feel the risk is too big, reduce it.
You need to start by changing how you think about the negative, because your never have to feel a negative if you turn it in to a positive
If that makes sense
NJ
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25-03-2014, 08:48 PM
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Well, I can talk to people...I just never let them see the real me. And which is why most people tend to not like me. <at least that is what it seems like to me>
I mean, I try to act like I'm fine and all, but lo and behold, when I hear something i don't like, a snarky comment makes its way up my throat.
I suppose I need to be myself, but people are now so used to the mask I put on, I think it would be a great shock if I suddenly changed. I don't want to be vulnerable and make myself the sudden target of everyone's amusement.
On the other hand, it would be nice if someone likes me. Panda is the only one that sees me for who I really am behind my needs-work-attitude.
Besides my parents and sisters that is. But that's a given.
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25-03-2014, 08:57 PM
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What do you have to lose if you removed your mask? if it feels like nobody likes you now, then whos to say what they would like or dislike. They probably think you are an *** who puts on this fancy persona at work etc.
End of the day you are not in others minds so you dont know what they are thinking, and more importantly you shouldnt care about anyone elses thoughts on who you are.
But that aside, I dont think that is the true reason you wear a mask, yes okay to protect yourself but, what do you think of who you are, the real you?
I dont mean to sound blunt, I am just someone who says it how I see it and talks from experience.
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25-03-2014, 09:00 PM
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You have a point there, but it will most likely take time. Lots and lots of time on my part to fully come out of my shell.
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25-03-2014, 09:02 PM
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Time and patience are essential to being aware and developing yourself
One step at a time
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