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  #31  
Old 25-04-2018, 09:09 AM
Shivani Devi Shivani Devi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captainamerica
I am sorry Shivani Devi ji ,

I will "sod-off" if you decide me too.

Here is my side of the story.
After reading it ,if you decide to forgive me its okay .Else I am thankful for all the help you gave me until now and won't be troubling you any more.

I've been under clinical depression ,insomnia and get many periods of panic attacks daily from the past 3 years ,I take about 6 pills daily and visit two doctors every week.The first thing I do in the morning after waking up is to vomit because of the panic attack.

Due to all this I cannot study or concentrate and failed in one of my classes just recently.This morning after the panic attack ,I had an idea ,I thought in my mind "Why not ask my friend Shivani Devi ji for the questions as they won't take money and having the questions before hand will ease of the pressure just a bit .(And I desperately need to let go of my pressure due to the health condition)"

And while thinking that idea my mind further romanticized the idea by saying to me-"God has helped Parmahansa Yogananda pass their exam through a miracle ,maybe Shiv-ji wants to help me that way to and not by correcting my health !"

It was never meant as a test to you.I understand now that it was a bad idea.
Hope you can forgive me and reply me to my PM.

Friends again ???
I shall be a bit more tolerant and take you off ignore, as it's a case of getting your priorities in order and had you spoken of this concern openly, instead of asking me to help you cheat, or to find a guru...I would have been more open, more loving and would be able to get Shiva to help you to help yourself.

You see, my friend, I also suffer badly with a psychosomatic illness, but I am slowly getting on top of it, without drugs...without playing the 'victim' or getting any advice from doctors.

First, let me recommend a book; "Self-Help For your Nerves" by Dr. Claire Weekes and for Panic Attacks, the best books out there are "Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway" by Susan Jeffers and "Living with IT" by Beth Ainsbett.

Now, for psychosomatic illness, I have recently downloaded a lot of helpful videos from Youtube myself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaJAIkyZGLg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erpPQDSWD0k

Now, in another thread, Davidsun also introduced me to Gestalt Therapy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dhway-iY0Bk

There is only one cure for anxiety, panic attacks and insomnia and that is just 'surrender' and 'letting go' which may involve meditation, mindfulness exercises and distraction therapies like EFT (tapping) and EMDR as well as CBT.

All it takes is for you to type in your problems into Google or Youtube and go through everything until you find one that resonates or sounds 'right' to you and then, download it and watch it every day! I have over 500 Youtube Videos on my PC...everything from "Consciousness Creates Reality" by Deepak Chopra to the DMT experiences of Terence McKenna.

Anything you ask of me, I'll just be rehashing anyway...and so, you need to amass your own personal resources that work for you.
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  #32  
Old 25-04-2018, 09:16 AM
captainamerica captainamerica is offline
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Thank you Shivani Devi ji for taking me off of your ignore list.

I am crying right now,because I was really worried and now I am relived.

Actually all of my friends and relatives (including my gf ) leave me because my health condition is reflected in my behavior.

I will never repeat the mistake again ,promise.
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  #33  
Old 25-04-2018, 09:31 AM
Shivani Devi Shivani Devi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captainamerica
Thank you Shivani Devi ji for taking me off of your ignore list.

I am crying right now,because I was really worried and now I am relived.

Actually all of my friends and relatives (including my gf ) leave me because my health condition is reflected in my behavior.

I will never repeat the mistake again ,promise.
It is okay.

Now, if you are going to ask me questions or if I am going to give you advice, you are not to ignore it and just ask more questions regardless of the answers I have already given you, capiche? If they are not right for you, they are not right for you, but I would prefer you to say it, so I know where I stand at least, okay? Have you looked into the programs offered at the Divine Life Society at Rishikesh? and you don't need and enlightened Guru as any meditation teacher will do at this stage and look into Yoga Nidra (like Shiv-ji suggested)...and if you have so much faith in your own teacher and their techniques (to give ME advice about my kundalini syndrome), have you managed to ask him about how to help YOU and follow that? or are you just happy to remain ill and try to cure everybody ELSE through those teachings? can't you see the hypocrisy of it? This is why I back off and shy away from you a lot...but I do understand and...crying is a good thing...you should do more of it. <3
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  #34  
Old 25-04-2018, 09:44 AM
captainamerica captainamerica is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shivani Devi
It is okay.

Now, if you are going to ask me questions or if I am going to give you advice, you are not to ignore it and just ask more questions regardless of the answers I have already given you, caprice? If they are not right for you, they are not right for you, but I would prefer you to say it, so I know where I stand at least, okay? Have you looked into the programs offered at the Divine Life Society at Rishikesh? and you don't need and enlightened Guru as any meditation teacher will do at this stage and look into Yoga Nidra (like Shiv-ji suggested)...and if you have so much faith in your own teacher and their techniques (to give ME advice about my kundalini syndrome), have you managed to ask him about how to help YOU and follow that? or are you just happy to remain ill and try to cure everybody ELSE through those teachings? can't you see the hypocrisy of it? This is why I back off and shy away from you a lot...but I do understand and...crying is a good thing...you should do more of it. <3

I don't have a physical teacher.I read a few scientific journals and according to scientists like Dr. James Hardt that method (along with a couple more ) should have worked in cases such as yours,so I recommended it to you.

I do try the method some times but the prerequisite of the method is to be in a calm state which I am unable to do as I am very very stressed or depressed almost the whole day.

I did look at the Divine life society and will go there in Risikesh as soon as i have the required money for travel.I also tried doing yoga nidra but it does not make me calm,but I will give it a try several more times since lord Shiv ji themselves suggested it.

You will be happy to know that one day Lord Krishna/Vasudev ji came to my dream and asked me to do something which I suppose I cannot discuss with other people.I need a physical guru to do that one thing lord Krishna wanted me to do and plus do one of my things as well.

I won't be ignoring your advice from now on,for sure,and I tried always to follow it in the past as well.

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  #35  
Old 25-04-2018, 10:05 AM
Shivani Devi Shivani Devi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captainamerica
I don't have a physical teacher.I read a few scientific journals and according to scientists like Dr. James Hardt that method (along with a couple more ) should have worked in cases such as yours,so I recommended it to you.

I do try the method some times but the prerequisite of the method is to be in a calm state which I am unable to do as I am very very stressed or depressed almost the whole day.

I did look at the Divine life society and will go there in Risikesh as soon as i have the required money for travel.I also tried doing yoga nidra but it does not make me calm,but I will give it a try several more times since lord Shiv ji themselves suggested it.

You will be happy to know that one day Lord Krishna/Vasudev ji came to my dream and asked me to do something which I suppose I cannot discuss with other people.I need a physical guru to that one thing lord Krishna wanted me to do and plus do one of my things as well.

I won't be ignoring your advice from now on,for sure,and I tried always to follow it in the past as well.

That's awesome!

Now, I understand...and if you need my help, you also need to be open and honest with me about everything!

If I don't have much to go on, then I can't look within to find the answers, as it will only be an affront.

I do not have an external Guru because Lord Shiva himself fills that role, and instead of asking me to ask Shiva, there's nothing stopping you from asking Lord Krishna/Vasudeva yourself, then leaving yourself open to whatever answers you get...without your ego instantly dismissing them.

Now, I 'get it' about how all of this reflects within myself and it's just a case of not knowing the whole 'story' or else I would understand it.

However, it takes a lot of self-surrender and you don't need to be in a 'peaceful state' to attain a 'peaceful state' or else, why bother when you are in that frame of mind to begin with?

Next time you have a panic attack...as hard as it is, go with it! realise that you've had them before and no doubt, you'll have them again and you are still alive to tell the story and so no, you didn't have a 'heart attack' or a 'stroke'...it's only your subconscious mind deciding to attack your body...and it's a sucker for your full attention...the more attention/focus you give it, the more it will torment you...and you need to learn how to say; "C'mon...do your worst! kill me! DO IT!...what are you waiting for you bloody coward?...I'm waiting...get it over and done with!" at first, this is VERY hard to do...but the more you do it, the easier it gets and your panic attacks will start to fade. Going back about 3 years ago, I used to have about 6-10 panic attacks a DAY...and now, I'll only get 1-2 a month and they go away as soon as they come when I say "oh it's YOU again...haven't you learned by now, I couldn't care less, so either kill me or pee off..." and they stop almost as soon as they start.
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  #36  
Old 25-04-2018, 10:16 AM
captainamerica captainamerica is offline
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Posts: 411
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shivani Devi
That's awesome!

Now, I understand...and if you need my help, you also need to be open and honest with me about everything!

If I don't have much to go on, then I can't look within to find the answers, as it will only be an affront.

I do not have an external Guru because Lord Shiva himself fills that role, and instead of asking me to ask Shiva, there's nothing stopping you from asking Lord Krishna/Vasudeva yourself, then leaving yourself open to whatever answers you get...without your ego instantly dismissing them.

Now, I 'get it' about how all of this reflects within myself and it's just a case of not knowing the whole 'story' or else I would understand it.

However, it takes a lot of 'self-surrender' and you don't need to be in a 'peaceful state' to attain a 'peaceful state' or else, why bother when you are in that frame of mind to begin with?

Next time you have a panic attack...as hard as it is, go with it! realise that you've had them before and no doubt, you'll have them again and you are still alive to tell the story and so no, you didn't have a 'heart attack' or a 'stroke'...it's only your subconscious mind deciding to attack your body...and it's a sucker for your attention...the more attention/focus you give it, the more it will torment you...and you need to learn how to say; "C'mon...do your worst! kill me! DO IT!...what are you waiting for you bloody coward?...I'm waiting...get it over and done with!" at first, this is VERY hard to do...but the more you do it, the easier it is and your panic attacks will start to fade. Going back about 3 years ago, I used to have about 6-10 panic attacks a DAY...and now, I'll only get 1-2 a month and they go away as soon as they come when I say "oh it's YOU again...haven't you learned by now, I couldn't care less, so either kill me or pee off..." and they stop almost as soon as they start.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shivani Devi
I do not have an external Guru because Lord Shiva himself fills that role, and instead of asking me to ask Shiva, there's nothing stopping you from asking Lord Krishna/Vasudeva yourself, then leaving yourself open to whatever answers you get...without your ego instantly dismissing them

I tried doing many times over the period of past 3 years of that experience ,Lord Krishna ji only replied once(That too was difficult to comprehend at first !) ,And I keep on trying it but I guess my channel to receive information are not as developed as yours and also my kundalini is not activated (I've heard that activated kundalini leads to the ability to channel information from a higher being).Still ,I will follow your advice and keep on trying as you told me to.There is no loss in trying for a good cause !

Your story about dealing with the panic attacks is very, very inspiring to me.Thank you so much for sharing it with me.It gives me hope.
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  #37  
Old 25-04-2018, 10:55 AM
Shivani Devi Shivani Devi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captainamerica
I tried doing many times over the period of past 3 years of that experience ,Lord Krishna ji only replied once(That too was difficult to comprehend at first !) ,And I keep on trying it but I guess my channel to receive information are not as developed as yours and also my kundalini is not activated (I've heard that activated kundalini leads to the ability to channel information from a higher being).Still ,I will follow your advice and keep on trying as you told me to.There is no loss in trying for a good cause !

Your story about dealing with the panic attacks is very, very inspiring to me.Thank you so much for sharing it with me.It gives me hope.
It is my pleasure.

I also still get nauseous and throw up in the mornings occasionally, but I have my own way of dealing with it and the only times it will happen now, is IF I don't do my 'things' to prevent it.

Firstly, quite by accident, I was given a whole lot of certain tablets by a friend...she had them in her cupboard and they were about a month 'past date' and she was going to throw them out...that didn't bother me for what tablets they were..12 hour slow-release vitamin B6 and Ginger tablets for pregnant women...I'm not pregnant, but I could see how they would benefit me:

https://www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/...ief-30-Tablets

Secondly, don't eat or drink anything within 4 hours of going to bed...and if you drink coffee or tea, don't...if you smoke, don't...and watch what you put in your body...keep the low GI stuff for the mornings.

To help with the insomnia, try some Tanpura drones at very low volume. Listen to something so incredibly boring, it will make you fall asleep anyway! There are things that will put me there...these are just examples:

30 minute slow "Om Namah Shivaya":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CnfGtZ-8nI

I will have this on 'repeat' for 8 hours...all night I will listen while I am sleeping.

I also love Japanese Koto Zen music:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkW1iTyS8dk

When all else fails, I will take some Kava Kava tablets, which is excellent for anxiety and stress...

Basically, you need to re-learn how to take care of yourself by doing things that make you relaxed...make you happy.
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  #38  
Old 25-04-2018, 10:59 AM
captainamerica captainamerica is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shivani Devi
It is my pleasure.

I also still get nauseous and throw up in the mornings occasionally, but I have my own way of dealing with it and the only times it will happen now, is IF I don't do my 'things' to prevent it.

Firstly, quite by accident, I was given a whole lot of certain tablets by a friend...she had them in her cupboard and they were about a month 'past date' and she was going to throw them out...that didn't bother me for what tablets they were..12 hour slow-release vitamin B6 and ginger tablets for pregnant women...I'm not pregnant, lol...but I could see how they would benefit me:

https://www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/...ief-30-Tablets

Secondly, don't eat or drink anything within 4 hours of going to bed...and if you drink coffee or tea, don't...if you smoke, don't...and watch what you put in your body...keep the low GI stuff for the mornings.

To help with the insomnia, try some Tanpura drones at very low volume. Listen to something so incredibly boring, it will make you fall asleep anyway! There are things that will put me there...these are just examples:

30 minute slow "Om Namah Shivaya":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CnfGtZ-8nI

I will have this on 'repeat' for 8 hours...all night I will listen while I am sleeping.

I also love Japanese Koto Zen music:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkW1iTyS8dk

When all else fails, I will take some Kava Kava tablets, which is excellent for anxiety and stress...

Basically, you need to re-learn how to take care of yourself by doing things that make you relaxed...make you happy.

I checked out your links and advice.I will follow it.

I will listen to the Om Namah Shivay 30 min. chant for sleeping today to see if it will help me in sleeping.

Thank you so much for the valuable advice !
I will definitely follow it.

Will also look at Kava Kava tablets on google.
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  #39  
Old 25-04-2018, 11:12 AM
running running is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnathanrs
What is it you experience? I’m just curious what enlightenment is to you? thanks

A great question deserves a great answer. Everyone has a different construct for enlightenment, but enlightenment to me is ascending through the stages of hell and heaven and reaching the higher levels of consciousness and escaping the universal law of karma/dharma. My purpose is to interpret the teachings of the ancient times for the modern human. I am merely following in the foot steps as my forefathers. As a guide, one should be able to interpret the teachings for others to follow. I decided to undergo this due to my frustration with the belief that there isn't a modern version of the bible, buddhas teachings, and so on. Everyday we challenge ourselves to achieve something in our reality. I am merely working as a guide for others and offering the same free service to you all, as what was offered to me through the teachings of the past ascended masters.

I am not the first, but I one of many that have climbed Mount Everest. It was through the guidance of great teachers that I accomplishment this. I merely am passing that torch for anyone who is currently undergoing this challenge themselves and am offering advice.

As for why I am taking the time to answer questions on these forums, this serves my will because it is helping me gather questions when I make a spiritual website for anyone to follow free of charge. I recently completed this journey and am still downloading all the information on the physical plane. The physical is bound by time, and thus it takes time to download all the information that happened on the spiritual plane.


ok. thanks. lets try this again. think i worded the question wrong. what is your expereince. not what you think it is. but what it is in expereince. in few words descrihe what it is you expereince in this high state.
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  #40  
Old 25-04-2018, 05:16 PM
kralaro kralaro is offline
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Johnathanrs,

Somewhere i've written a question for you, can you please answer it?
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